I open the browser on my phone
And then I close it
For the tenth time
I have a dozen things to do
But nothing in me wants to
So I sit here, depressed,
Dry clothes wrinkling in the dryer

Recorded as spoken word: https://soundcloud.com/user4081486/behind-me

how would you feel

if you sat behind me

as I sit at my desk

as I read poetry

as I write poetry

as I consider what's going on in my heart

as I think about how much I miss yours

could you fall in love with me again?

Not the whole me, anyway
I...can't share who I am
Not here, not now
But I write
To give you hope
There's someone else
Like you
And if you are you;
If you're the one
I'm speaking to;
The one who knows
Exactly what I'm
Hinting at;
Well,
You are pretty broken
But people improve
And they disprove
What others believe
To be absolute truth
And I
I am one of these
And you could be, too

her eyes
are far more
than pretty;
their surface is
gleaming gloss,
and just beneath,
a green
and blue
and hazel nebula
appears too vivid
to be real,
as though
a drop of blood
fell into a full glass
and turned a
soothing
mix of colors,
but lost none
of its
intensity
or
life
or
the pain
that drew it out

I'm better at
crying
than writing
a piece to
wet your eye
But because of
how I feel
as this tear
streaks
down
my
cheek
I have to try
I have to try

Written as spoken word: https://soundcloud.com/user4081486/colorado

So I hear you want to move out of town
Colorado the destination
Though you always, always had California on your mind
And CO is the exact opposite of CA
Except for ****
And except for your boyfriend

And I hear you could keep your job and work from home out of state
That would be great
So you could stay inside all winter, out of the cold
And you'd never meet a new soul
But you'd have your ****
And you'd have your boyfriend

But sadly, you'll rot away inside as you come to realize you hate this place
And though your new love is perfect at first, he becomes irate
And even though you're the sweetest thing in his life if he'd only open his eyes,
He doesn't seem to see it so clearly anymore

And the longer you stay, the further you grow away
Because you already gave him your all by moving away
And it cost him nothing.

Just like with your last boyfriend, being with you
Cost him nothing.

And now, again, when it starts to cost him anything at all,
You'll find he's not so much fun anymore.

And the truth is I know nothing about your relationship
The truth is all I'm basing this on a hunch, and some things I remember from the time we spent together
And the truth is this has nothing to do with where you go or who you know
The truth is it's just another self-centered poem about me being hurt

But I still think you're making a huge mistake
And I'm sorry
Because it's really gonna hurt when you uproot your whole life
Only to find he would never lift a finger for you
I'm sorry

I find pictures of you
I've never seen before;
The same missing feeling,
Only just a bit more