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 Nov 2014 ns
Chikadey Grace
I never knew my mother
in ways some girls know theirs
she left in winter
My sister was only two
She grabbed her stuff
and when we weren't looking
she ran through the door
she never said 'good bye'
she never cried
were we nothing to her?
It goes through my mind
at least once a day
if my mother was here
would I be in this much pain
There was a lady
that my dad married
she didn't want anything to do with me
I was just an obstacle in the family
I've had people to look up to don't get me wrong
but no one who actually wants to be my mom
My stepmom to be
is the closest I've got
but she never has wanted to be a mom
so we are more like friends
but she takes care of me
am I not worth it
is it me
why does everyone leave
no I'm not perfect
I'm covered in scars
And I feel safest
when I'm cutting
but I promised I wouldn't
so recently
I've felt insane
Never knowing my mother isn't really my problem
it's never having a real mother
 Nov 2014 ns
Dee
A Requiem to Life
 Nov 2014 ns
Dee
Unable to perceive right from wrong
Oh! How long…Oh! How long
When today’s today shall be relegated to the past
These precious moments would be forever lost,


Yesterday…
Heavens came my way
But tides kept me astray
Alas! Such was their power
A deluge, not a trickle or a shower,

How I now wish
The clock had stood still
I could’ve clasped those precious moments
Before my life just withered & ebbed away,

Now as I stand far from myself
Look back and say
Where was I?
Where was my soul?

That beautiful, blessed day
When Heavens came my way*.
Thoughts, musings
 Nov 2014 ns
Mr X
Discover
 Nov 2014 ns
Mr X
The only key to conquer the world
Is to discover one's own self....
 Nov 2014 ns
B M
Life takes me to odd places
You were one of them
From the time that I met you
I knew it would be different
It’s okay if you are into someone else
The heart wants what the heart wants
And I am positive about this
With my experiences with you
I learned more about myself
Than I thought I would
I learned that I am brave
Or at least capable of being so
I learned that deep down inside
I’m positive as ****
And
I learned that you can find friends
In the most unlikely places
Thank you for the memories
They were pretty great
And I hope that we make more
he likes someone else and i'm oddly okay with that
 Nov 2014 ns
Satsuki
I'm sorry
 Nov 2014 ns
Satsuki
It's not that I don't trust you
It's just memories of the past
Warn me not to
 Nov 2014 ns
Hannah
stolen
 Nov 2014 ns
Hannah
her naked body
splayed across her bed
arms wrapped against his lean muscular body
breathing in sync
exhale, inhale
body against body
the glass wall now broken
shattering barriers between them
collecting their uncertain love
fusing them together as one
a love unbroken;
solidified,
now has formed
every move he makes
like nothing she's ever experienced
left afterwards to rest
against his body
head against his heart
thumping, fast
then slowing down
like a butterfly wing's flutter
when sleep enfolds him in its arms
and comforts him, simultaneously as she,
oh how that night felt
with him
and oh how she misses
his once undying love,
because that night
and that burning love
has now turned to embers
and blown away with the gusts of wind,
never to be seen again
yearning to be with him
she knew that night meant forever
a bond to never be broken
but he didn't seem to realize this
and broke everything they ever had
like a crack in a line
a hole in a heart
and now scattered embers
blow across the earth
never to be ignited again
September
 Nov 2014 ns
Sylvia Plath
The photographic chamber of the eye
records bare painted walls, while an electric light
lays the chromium nerves of plumbing raw;
such poverty assaults the ego; caught
naked in the merely actual room,
the stranger in the lavatory mirror
puts on a public grin, repeats our name
but scrupulously reflects the usual terror.

Just how guilty are we when the ceiling
reveals no cracks that can be decoded? when washbowl
maintains it has no more holy calling
than physical ablution, and the towel
dryly disclaims that fierce troll faces lurk
in its explicit folds? or when the window,
blind with steam, will not admit the dark
which shrouds our prospects in ambiguous shadow?

Twenty years ago, the familiar tub
bred an ample batch of omens; but now
water faucets spawn no danger; each crab
and octopus -- scrabbling just beyond the view,
waiting for some accidental break
in ritual, to strike -- is definitely gone;
the authentic sea denies them and will pluck
fantastic flesh down to the honest bone.

We take the plunge; under water our limbs
waver, faintly green, shuddering away
from the genuine color of skin; can our dreams
ever blur the intransigent lines which draw
the shape that shuts us in? absolute fact
intrudes even when the revolted eye
is closed; the tub exists behind our back;
its glittering surfaces are blank and true.

Yet always the ridiculous **** flanks urge
the fabrication of some cloth to cover
such starkness; accuracy must not stalk at large:
each day demands we create our whole world over,
disguising the constant horror in a coat
of many-colored fictions; we mask our past
in the green of Eden, pretend future's shining fruit
can sprout from the navel of this present waste.
In this particular tub, two knees jut up
like icebergs, while minute brown hairs rise
on arms and legs in a fringe of kelp; green soap
navigates the tidal slosh of seas
breaking on legendary beaches; in faith
we shall board our imagined ship and wildly sail
among sacred islands of the mad till death
shatters the fabulous stars and makes us real.
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