I won't allow you
To question me
On old, broken mirrors
And old, shattered dreams
I won't let you see me
Based solely
On what the world did to me
Through the eyes of self-pity
So to answer your questions
Yes, I'm doing just fine
With all that has happened
I found a way to survive
Not by myself though,
I can't stand here and lie
I had some extra help
Something divine

To my best friends

a vow of loyalty

I swear to you, if a punchbuggy drives by, you will not be able to move your arm for a week.

I swear to you, I will help you finish anything you start. Especially your fries.

I swear I will impale any guy who cheats on you.

I swear any guy who breaks your heart will wonder how his limbs came to be unattached from his body over night.

I swear any ***** that gives you trouble will wonder where her eyebrows and ears when, in the morning when she wakes up.

I swear I will protect you from everything and anything I can.

I swear I will care more about your problems than you do.

I swear I will not only be more concerned about your love life than you are, but make your happiness love-wise my own personal mission in life above any of my needs.

I swear I will let you outrun me if there is a bear chasing us. Mainly because I **** at running, but also so that you can get away. No, it is mostly because I am bad at running.

Swaddle me in paperwork
To cover up the cracks
Evaluate my worthiness
To calculate my tax
Privatise the atmosphere
And charge me by the breath
Bind me into servitude
Employ me half to death
See I'm put to pasture
When I'm unfit for the herd
Then reduce me to a metaphor
And sell me by the word

**