she looked worn out and wrinkly.
her date in comparison was wearing a beige suit, but under the dusk light he looked like he was the same color as the building paint. he could almost pass as presentable.
he was a business graduate, and he recently had some sort of corporate deal that would grant him some sort of something.
she didn't care for it at all, whatever happened with him and such.
all he is to her was some old college friend of a friend, who happened to approach her a few weeks back.
it had been a while since she had talked to anyone from her old school, and she was almost bewildered that chuck asked to take her to dinner. she couldn't refuse; despite of what she thinks of him, or what he would think of her, she was not one to refuse activity.
all she is expecting now is company, and a good talk and a good dinner. she expects that from him, but not from herself.
taking her seat, she felt a bit lightheaded.
the restaurant was glamourous. it looked liked the insides of a department store furniture section. hardwood beams and hardwood posts and matte black stools with velvet cushions. the lights were incandescent; the type of light she loved, that reminded her of four o'clock sunshine and reflections upon amber fall leaves.
๐ช๐ง ๐ฐ๐ฏ๐ญ๐บ ๐ฎ๐บ ๐ฑ๐ญ๐ข๐ค๐ฆ ๐ญ๐ฐ๐ฐ๐ฌ๐ฆ๐ฅ ๐ญ๐ช๐ฌ๐ฆ ๐ต๐ฉ๐ช๐ด, she pondered. her mind began to wander.
"๐ ๐๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐
๐๐๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐๐ ๐๐ ๐๐๐๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐๐...--
"Hey, are you alright?"
she was staring at the lightbulbs. she was startled
"Oh, sorry. Long day. Can we have some water?"
they gestured to the waiter. chuck had the flair of a high class yuppie. all around her were upper middle class couples and well dressed demoiselles drinking brightly colored cocktails. she felt small.
the waiter gave them a pitcher of cucumber water and their menus.
๐ฆ๐ถ๐จ๐ฉ, ๐ค๐ถ๐ค๐ถ๐ฎ๐ฃ๐ฆ๐ณ ๐ช๐ฏ ๐ธ๐ข๐ต๐ฆ๐ณ. ๐ธ๐ฉ๐บ ๐ข๐ณ๐ฆ ๐ต๐ฉ๐ฆ๐บ ๐ต๐ณ๐บ๐ช๐ฏ๐จ ๐ต๐ฐ ๐ฎ๐ข๐ฌ๐ฆ ๐ต๐ฉ๐ช๐ฏ๐จ๐ด ๐ต๐ข๐ด๐ต๐ฆ ๐ญ๐ช๐ฌ๐ฆ ๐ข ๐ง๐ช๐ด๐ฉ๐ฑ๐ฐ๐ฏ๐ฅ.
"Order anything you'd like" said chuck. "I'm not afraid to spend tonight."
"Are you sure? We can split this later, I got paid and all-"
"Please, it'd be rude of me to make you pay. Especially now."
๐ธ๐ฉ๐ข๐ต ๐ธ๐ข๐ด ๐ต๐ฉ๐ข๐ต ๐ด๐ถ๐ฑ๐ฑ๐ฐ๐ด๐ฆ๐ฅ ๐ต๐ฐ ๐ฎ๐ฆ๐ข๐ฏ?
she looked at the menu. it had all sorts of cuisines, european and exotic. she could order something from spain and eat her way through the mediterranean and the alps and end up eating desert from japan.
๐ช ๐ต๐ฉ๐ฐ๐ถ๐จ๐ฉ๐ต ๐ต๐ฉ๐ช๐ด ๐ธ๐ข๐ด ๐ข๐ฏ ๐ช๐ต๐ข๐ญ๐ช๐ข๐ฏ ๐ณ๐ฆ๐ด๐ต๐ข๐ถ๐ณ๐ข๐ฏ๐ต
she hadn't eaten for hours. shame went out of the window.
"I'll have the fillet. And the mushroom soup. And the swordfish. And this. And this... how do you say this? Yeah that..."
chuck was stone faced. he ordered the same steak. he then asked about the wine selection. the waiter asked her the same.
"Oh, I'm sorry," she said. "I don't drink. Maybe the iced tea."
the waiter went off with their menus.
"You don't drink? I thought in college you were a connoisseur of sorts." chuck asked.
"I don't drink now. College was ancient history."
"It's been a while, huh. Do you still talk to the other guys? Your old dorm mates? Mel?"
she shuddered at the thought of mel. she hadn't even thought of that name for years.
"No, I haven't talked to them. I barely talk to anyone these days, other than work."
"Oh, okay."
their appetizers arrived. a basket of italian bread was on the side; she immediately went for a piece.
"I've been working with my old mates." said chuck. "We were part of a merger of our company and that really was a stepping stone for us-"
"Yeah, yeah, mhm." she wasn't paying any attention. she was busy buttering her bread stick.
"And that gave me a lot of opportunities and stuff. I got a new house, new car, first class on business trips..."
chuck went on clamoring about his mcmansion and second hand ferrari. it went on for a few minutes.
"Yeah, that's great." she mumbled, with bread in her mouth.
she went for the last two pieces of foccacia on the basket.
"Aren't you going to try the bread?" she asked. whether it was out of shame or politeness she did not know.
"No. You're emptying it anyways. Don't fill up."
she looked up and saw chuck with an expression of mild annoyance. she sat straight and offered him a bread stick.
"It's fine." chuck went to have a sip of his wine. "How about you, what have you been up to these days?"
somehow, she didn't expect to be asked that.
"I'm doing good. Stable office job."
"Yeah. Mhm."
there is a silence within the hubbub of diners. the bread she was eating tasted like it suddenly turned cold.
๐ง๐ถ๐ค๐ฌ ๐ฎ๐ฆ ๐ช ๐ฉ๐ข๐ท๐ฆ ๐ฏ๐ฐ๐ต๐ฉ๐ช๐ฏ๐จ ๐ต๐ฐ ๐ด๐ข๐บ.
"Soooo..." she mumbled. "The food here good?"
"You must be hungry." chuck tensed.
"Yeah, I'm sorry. I was just tired the entire day and I didn't get to eat lunch..."
"Don't apologize. This is a dinner. We're here to eat."
"Yeah, and to get together."
"Yes."
๐บ๐ฆ๐ฑ, ๐ฏ๐ฐ, ๐ต๐ฉ๐ช๐ด ๐ช๐ด ๐ค๐ณ๐ข๐ฑ. ๐ช ๐ธ๐ข๐ฏ๐ต ๐ต๐ฐ ๐ญ๐ฆ๐ข๐ท๐ฆ.
"You did order quite a lot." chuck finished his wine.
"We'll share."
"It's fine. I'm trying to reduce, actually. Been working out and all."
"Oh, are you? Back in college you were quite big."
"...yes. Yes I was."
๐ช ๐ด๐ฉ๐ฐ๐ถ๐ญ๐ฅ๐ฏ'๐ต ๐ฉ๐ข๐ท๐ฆ ๐ด๐ข๐ช๐ฅ ๐ต๐ฉ๐ข๐ต.
"Anyways..."
"Oh, excuse me." chuck had a phone call.
she looked around. everyone looked like they were enjoying themselves. she could see herself in one of the bar mirrors, with a pallid expression and subpar hair. she looked at chuck. he looked busy and executive. she could not deny that he looked well and good, but in her eyes she still sees a plump frat boy with badly oiled hair and spots painted with acne cream.
chuck's call ended as their order arrived. as it was all set she immediately started on her mushroom soup.
"Enjoy." chuck had another glass of wine.
she ate quickly. she ate her soup before it cooled down and ate her steak before it lost all of its red. she topped her italian swordfish with an orange mash potato and ate it with her salad. she downed three cups of iced tea and ordered another pitcher of it.
chuck ate his steak quietly, sipping his wine occasionally.
"You really are hungry." chuck finished his plate.
"Mhm, yes I am." she said, while admiring a piece of arugula.
chuck stared at her. she kept eating. this went on for several minutes.
"You know, I didn't expect this night to be like this." chuck leaned back.
that set her aback. she looked to see chuck looking slightly displeased.
"What do you mean?"
"Look, I have to leave in about thirty or forty five minutes. My boss needs me. Can we check out early?"
"Oh, yes, of course." she dropped her fork. chuck called for the waiter.
her lightheadedness returned. the food did not help
"What did you mean you didn't expect the night to be like this?" she asked.
"Oh, it's nothing."
"No, come on, please. I'd like to know what you mean."
chuck swirled his wine around. "It's just that it's been a while, and I thought-" chuck paused for a moment. he took a sip.
"I thought you'd be different. I mean I don't mean different but you're different in a way I didn't expect."
๐ธ๐ฉ๐ข๐ต ๐ต๐ฉ๐ฆ ๐ง๐ถ๐ค๐ฌ ๐ช๐ด ๐ฉ๐ฆ ๐ต๐ข๐ญ๐ฌ๐ช๐ฏ๐จ ๐ข๐ฃ๐ฐ๐ถ๐ต. "I don't get it."
"No, I mean- you're not whom I expected. You know, I thought you'd be that old talk from college, you know-"
she was beginning to get it. "Did you talk to Geo before?"
"Yeah, I did." he finished his wine. the bottle had two more inches left.
that ruined it for her.
"I remember you being cheerful and chatty back then." said chuck. "You know, back in the old days, you were the girl who everyone looked up to, loud scholar and activist and all. Geo and your dorm mates had a lot to say about you."
๐ฐ๐ง ๐ค๐ฐ๐ถ๐ณ๐ด๐ฆ ๐ต๐ฉ๐ฆ๐บ ๐ฅ๐ช๐ฅ.
"And they always say, 'you were a mean drunk, you always wanted to talk, always had something to talk about.' Nothing that happened in your day was uninteresting for you, they say."
she pushed her plate away. "Well it's been a while, Chuck. It's not college anymore. Not that I agree with you, just- ugh, I dont know..."
"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to say that. I didn't mean to ruin this date."
"Oh, yeah. It's a date." she feels like she needs to run away.
"But I hope you're doing well. I hope you enjoyed the food, at least."
"Okay." she said.
they sat in silence for a minute. chuck's eyes were still at her. she checked her phone. no charge.
the waiter came and went with the bill. they sat in silence as chuck finished the bottle of wine. she felt the need to say something.
"You know... I saw a weird hat earlier." she blurted.
"Hm?"
"It was round, and made of plastic. It was like a bowl..."
"You mean a hardhat?"
๐ฐ๐ฉ, ๐ฎ๐ข๐บ๐ฃ๐ฆ... "Yeah, something like that."
more silence. it was beginning to turn unbearable.
she had to think of more things to say. she looked around, looked at chuck. she remembered. "What's in the bag?" she had to ask.
"Oh, nothing. Just my stuff." he raised it up. it looked like a fresh shopping bag.
๐ฅ๐ฐ๐ฆ๐ด๐ฏ'๐ต ๐ญ๐ฐ๐ฐ๐ฌ ๐ญ๐ช๐ฌ๐ฆ ๐ช๐ต. ๐ณ๐ช๐ค๐ฉ ๐ง๐ถ๐ค๐ฌ ๐ญ๐ช๐ฌ๐ฆ ๐บ๐ฐ๐ถ ๐ธ๐ฐ๐ถ๐ญ๐ฅ ๐ฃ๐ณ๐ช๐ฏ๐จ ๐ข ๐ด๐ถ๐ช๐ต๐ค๐ข๐ด๐ฆ, ๐ฏ๐ฐ๐ต ๐ข ๐ฑ๐ข๐ฑ๐ฆ๐ณ ๐ฃ๐ข๐จ...
"Anyways, I have to go." chuck stood. it was barely thirty minutes
"Oh, I'll come with you." she stood and went. it is raining outside.
his car was parked in the back, they had to run to the shade.
"Can I have a ride?" she asked, worriedly.
"No, I'm sorry, I have to go." chuck went and left on his rip off supercar. she was left on the sidewalk, in the pouring rain.
...
she arrived home, soaking.
she went straight to the bathroom. the rain was cold on her head, and gave her shivers. the lightheadedness turned into a headache.
she kneeled on the can. she threw up steak, and swordfish, and iced tea.
she took off all of her clothes and dried herself. she went to her living room and laid down on the carpet.
๐จ๐ณ๐ฆ๐ข๐ต, she thought. ๐ซ๐ถ๐ด๐ต ๐จ๐ณ๐ฆ๐ข๐ต.
she sat and took her pen from the clothes bin. she opened her notebook.
"๐๐๐๐ ๐๐ ๐ ๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐
๐๐๐๐ ๐๐๐
๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐ ๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐๐...
๐จ๐ฐ๐ฅ๐ฅ๐ข๐ฎ๐ฏ ๐ช๐ต. ๐จ๐ฐ๐ฅ ๐ฅ๐ข๐ฎ๐ฏ.
she ripped the page off and wrote on a new one.
"๐๐๐๐๐ ๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐ ๐ ๐
๐๐๐.
๐๐๐ ๐๐๐
๐๐๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐๐ ๐๐๐ ๐๐
๐๐๐ ๐ ๐๐๐ ๐๐ ๐๐๐๐."
she closed her notebook. she stared at the ceiling once more.
๐ฅ๐ช๐ง๐ง๐ฆ๐ณ๐ฆ๐ฏ๐ต, ๐ฉ๐ถ๐ฉ. ๐ธ๐ฉ๐ข๐ต ๐ข ๐ญ๐ฐ๐ข๐ฅ.
she closed her eyes and slept.
if you reached this far, that's awesome.
i won't make all of them that long, wink, but this one had to be long so that it's made clear how boring that date was.