1:00 am
My phone buzzes
Your name appears on the screen
I tell myself
You do not really
Miss me
You've drowned
Your sorrows
Into acohol
An you're drunk  
You say you
Miss me
You want me
Your drunken words
Roll off your tongue
And into my heart
As if It has stopped beating
I cannot help
But to believe this
I have missed you
Ever since that night
With the yelling and screaming
It was over
I cannot help but to
Say I miss you too
And then
Those two words
I've been dawning to hear
Come through the phone
"I'm sorry"

pour yourself a drink
it's four o clock somewhere
and who cares if in the morning
you'll feel so much worse

pour it with shaking hands
from caffeine worse for wear
and no food that day
just as long as it hurts

let the wine spill down
in gulps of pain and regret
don't bother to measure
you'll feel a little better

let it race into your blood
all you want is to forget
your liver fails and body cries
with each sip saying 'whatever'

choose to lose your mind
and senses to getting ****** up
oblivion your only goal
hoping it'll be over soon

choose to disregard advice
because it's never enough
and neither are you as
you howl at an ignorant moon

drink down each new glass
with reckless abandon and hope
that you'll forget this night or
finally commit that deadly act

drink until you're hollowed
you empty out and heaven knows
you want to die each minute
now there's no going back

listen to voices instead of friends
to pain instead of love
part your skin to cry in red
because your eyes are stone cold

listen to acohol and pills
as the only things you trust
give up and give in because
your future is dust not gold.


*© Tara India.

I use
to have a solution to
any feeling I had

your love
acohol
blades

and everything's gone

and I sit here
thinking about my addictions

and oh how easy
it could be for me
to slip back
into old me

she's been gone
for almost a year

she's in my mind
yelling at me
saying
"dear god get me the hell out of here"
begging me
to let her be free

you texted me
I'm sorry baby forgive me,
it was the acohol talking
and now once again I dont know what to think