A broken mirror of my reflection
A shriek of pain from repeating rejection
A complex scheme
To learn a lesson
****** palms as I play psalms
Picking up the pieces of a life at risk
Started out with pricked fingers
Now I'm avoiding a ****** wrist
A deteriorating gas is pressing to exit my mind
It eats away at every sane thought left inside
Where do I go when it's my true self that I have to hide
Everything I say is a constant mistake
So I grit my teeth till they ache and I mumble words until they marinate
Working on self love but the moments like these that are within myself are the ones that I hate
I search for repression but where do I begin
When this is all I know
When there's always the question of an end
Save me from myself because Lord knows I've sinned
I'd take it all back if I could run it again
I hope he doesn't lose faith in me
He's my only friend
It seems like ever since this has began I've been blessed with a beautiful curse
I ask God for the best but I still expected the worst
Maybe this is what happens
When everything is diverse
See it in my eyes
See the rift in my soul
See the angry love
Burning a hole
See the ache for expectance
Taking a toll
Skins red but it's feels cold
For the content that makes up me
It grits down like sand
All I ever wanted
Was a loving hand
They tell me I'll be okay
But I don't think they understand
For this is not a human quality
I am merely man
I am left to supply
When commitment was my only demand
Two judges and one man
Will I be enough when I take the stand
(r.n.)