My body is the urn that holds my ashes.
No matter how I change its shape and design,
its purpose stays the same.

I’m all in, all ears
(You skip a beat)

/

As gull lifts from land, I will leave you to find kinder winds, subtler seas
-The earth has received my dues and thus sceneries come to pass.-

Not exactly that swan
lifting white grace
to the heavens
Nope
but thud and tug and ping
and whipping thud again
taking flight out across the highway
in my rear-view
Scuttled dust  
fiberglass flattened
by the truck behind
White-knuckling wheel while
       mentally    compute
split-second sounds and feels for damage...

I guess?
everything's
okay...?

First it was that blowout
Then one by one
the hubcaps lost their grips, their minds
and went their ways
to join the trash
of butts and chunks of mattress
fast-food wrappers, road-****
by the guardrail
of another day

Most recent--
Antenna disconnect
Fixed with tape 'cause
Gotta have that music
heat, AC, tires, breaks
Ya know-- important things
like that steady humming engine

Destined to be--
buckboard to the beach or heaven
whichever's first
by the time its twenty
Much nearer than I'd care to say
Ode to Car and Driver
who get there--

in all good hope, together

             :)

I've tried under the bed,
and behing the old chair,
and that space no-one goes
right under the stairs,
i've tried hiding in bed,
and in all the spare rooms,
but there's no hiding out from
the sickening gloom,
when it starts to take hold,
it just swallows me up,
and my confidence leaves me
feeling like a new pup,
and my image distorts like
some twisted old tin,
and i fight and i try not
to let this thing in,
but it's bigger than me,
in so many bad ways,
and what starts out as hours
slowly turns into days,
they all melt into one,
and i barely exist but i
can't let this demon dish
out it's cruel twist, so i medicate
now and it goes for a while,
but i see in the mirror it's
horrid cruel smile,
ain't no hiding from this thing,
whatever it's called, but i'll
fight and i'll run and i'll hide
.......and i'll crawl

(c)eileenmcgreevy@ymail.com 2018

When you,re hiding in a closet,
thinking no one really knows,
and you do the things expected,
lifestyle, hair, hell even clothes,
what,s the point in being someone,
even you can,t recognise,
when the real you is much nicer,
never mind the sad disguise,
shake the cobwebs off and show yourself,
i promise, you,ll feel better,
and the ones who,d diss you,
matter not, tell them "write a letter",
you,re unique, a one off, all your own,
don,t let them tell you different,
you may inspire some other closet dwellers,
how excellent !

(c)eileenmcgreevy@ymail.com2018    (re-edited)