sometimes my pain
is yelling at my family
not even remembering why
sometimes my anger
is crying in my room alone
being careful not to make a sound
sometimes my sadness
is standing in the rain
wishing it would wash me away
sometimes my depression
is lying in bed and wanting to get up
but not being able to lift the chains
sometimes my breath
is stolen from my lungs
feeling all of this at once
sometimes my mind
is numb and empty
feeling nothing at all
sometimes im just... there
not feeling anything
but not feeling nothing
and sometimes in those moments
i wish i was dead.

words dance across
the pages of that
worn, old paper

my eyes dart
back and forth
like small fish
hoping to find
some morsel of nourishment

but all i have found
is bitter hate and despise-
things that are inedible

but i gobble them up-
desperate for anything
your hand provides

they say do not bite
the hand that feeds you

but what if that is the
same hand that
stabs and bruises your heart?
what then, little fish?

do you continue to
**** yourself by consuming
their poisoned love?

or do you simply choose
to live and swim away?

Butterflies have wings...
So do other lovely things...
Where are mine then, God?

dreams crushed
hopes shattered
here i sit in my
thoughtless wonder

joy diminished
sadness increased
here i walk in my
thoughtless wonder

heart spoiled
brain rotted
here i tie my
thoughtless wonder

peace disturbed
anguish expanded
here i hang my
thoughtless wonder

pain interrupted
madness depleted
here i die in my
thoughtless wonder.

you should check my blog out

Nice people cry
And nice people do
What everyone wants them to.

It doesn't really matter
If they get the blame
They'll smile and take it as a gift.

They think it's important
To put everyone first,
But everyone excludes them.

Nice people
Want everyone happy,
And everyone excludes them.