Stop to breathe.
Let each moment count,
Let every heartbeat shake you,
Spend your time in gardens of roses,
Coffee shops, rooms with fading books:
Spend moments chasing hours that
Will never return.
2. Love yourself.
You cannot pour from an empty glass;
You cannot give from an empty self.
Don't wait around for those who say,
"I'll love you when you're whole," or
"I can fix all of you that is broken."
Do not believe that you are broken.
3. Love your neighbors.
Not because any man commands it;
Love your neighbors because they are trying.
And so are you.
Like them, you cannot grow without love.
Like them, you are always able to give more love.
4. It's okay to leave when they hurt you.
It's okay to go, okay to withhold forgiveness.
Some wounds don't heal.
Your worth is not based upon how well you heal.
Time has a way of teaching you,
Giving, in pain, the lessons you must learn.
5. Repeat.
You are never done.
You are never too far gone.
You will be okay.
You will love again soon.

i wanna be the sun so bad
but this moon spoons
my dark spaces so v good

standing there
by a broken tree
torn to pieces
with a toothy grin screaming
"Im. Still. Breathing."

i walk in the rain
to purge my anxieties
rediscover peace

Pain smashes the illusion of utopia
for this freedom from delusion
I give thanks.
Pain in the scheme of things
points to more than itself.

this is not a poem. this is a plea. this is me begging you to hear me when i tell you that i love you. my voice is weak and shaking like the branches of a willow in the wind. my hands are trembling like tremors under the surface of the earth. my vision is so blurred that i can barely focus my eyes as i type. i can feel the impending collapse of my lungs as they are further crushed by the weight of all my anxieties. my strength is fading, but i'm still screaming for you, only you don't seem to hear me. i'm reaching for you but you won't take hold of my hand. i swear to god i'm trying with everything i have to hold you together, but i'm terrified it's not enough. the very thought of your nonexistence consumes me in a fear i have never known. i have never been good at telling people i need them, but i can tell you how vacant this world would be if you left it. everything would change. you can't come in to my life like you did and then just leave it with no warning. you can't do that to me. you can't tell me that you want to marry me and then try to disappear without so much as a goodbye. you just can't. so i don't mean to make you feel guilty, i just need you to understand. don't you know what it would do to me if you left? how many times are you going to almost-die before you realize i will never be the same if you do?