You're staring at me from the picture frame
My brain is inflamed with your name
It's repetitious
Almost fictitious
You're thought vapor
Remnants of a forgotten caper
But your always there to some extent
Like an ancient apocalyptic event
You were chaotic
Absolutely exotic
A mystery in every sense
With an air tight defense
Against any interaction
Any social transaction
You were cold and unblinking
No emotions just pure thinking
At least on the outside
But there was something you couldn't hide
A glimpse of fire in your eyes
Something that you despised
I dug at it like a half starving miner
Attempting to penetrate with bad one liners
But I was rejected
Completely misdirected
But I kept at it
Like an alcoholic with a bad habit
You were defiant
Completely self reliant
And I was addicted
Recently afflicted
With this ailment
Resulting in the complete derailment
Of my sanity
For the sake of your vanity
I followed you like a hound to the the trail
But to no avail

A bag full of winds
Nothing ends or begins
I chose a direction
There is no correction
I just wander
Thoughts i ponder
I bathe myself in smells
I experience personal hells
I hear a child's cry
I see a woman die
I don’t know what i know
My wind does not blow
My bag deflates
I consider my fates
I realize all is fair in love and war
and its shaken me to the core
Love and war are in all things
With all the troubles they bring
I get back on my feet
I refuse to admit defeat
The sun still shines
On our impressionable minds

I gaze at the ceiling
The tiles all moldy and peeling
My blood is about to boil
The food is starting to spoil
The fridge light blew out
I'm starting to fester doubt
My eyes are ablaze
And for the rest of my days
The seeds of fear shall spread
I hear the whispers of the dead.
It has been weeks
My mind and body reeks
Left alone
You now roam
Leaving me here to rot
You were all I sought.

A salty mist sprays into the air,
As water crashes against the shore.
A lone gull glides against the wind,
Over an abandoned January beach.
The sun, a cold dot in the bleak sky.

The clouds, low, thick and suffocating
Made the world feel compact
The airport has normalized
The strange metal beasts
That fly unhindered by gravity
The clouds hang low
The beasts fly high
The sounds of Engines
And Trembling Sonics
Are now heard without context
An otherwordly screech
By some lovecraftian horror
About to pierce the veil
And plummet into our plane

We are all going to live forever
As fragments floating in the ether
As tweets and emails
Photos and blogs
Our digital footprint
Will leave an imprint
On all of our graves
On the Internet
Nothing is private
Everything is public
Nothing is fleeting
Everything is forever

Water crept up on the rocks
Soaking our already damp shoes
Seeping into our socks
we throw them off not much to lose
The water crashes onto our skin
Shocking them with a biting cold
And we can't help but grin
The warm air suffocating us
We take the plunge
And without a fuss
and soak it up like a sponge
The water so cold and clean
And warm laughter pierces the air
Its so serene
and we don't have a care.

You’re a thought half remembered
Finer details seeping and slipping though
The cracks of memory
Never solid, always fleeting

Filling in the gaps
With leaps of logic
Painting in the blanks
With complementary shades

The past never dies
The corpse is repacked
Airbrushed and glossed
So it isn't so hard to look at

Sunlight dripping through your hair
And I just can't help but stare
There's something I can't admit
That you're something I just can't quit
Your eyes sparkle like dust in the moonlight
Your gaze makes everything seems alright
Your eyes blaze like a wild fire
Fueled by pure untainted desire
The doors are ripped off the hinges
We no longer cringe
All the emotion pours outward
Glowing,magical,bright,forward
Our lips flowed slowly dripping
Slow soft but gripping
A strange sensation
A half kiss, dripping with temptation
We make eye contact
Our bodies react
The gears shift
Our thoughts drift
Far away evaporating
And its invigorating
We kiss and kiss
Eternal bliss
Dead languages on our tongues
We speak in the way of the young ones

You sent me a letter
I nearly dropped it when I picked it up
I read the return address at least three times
The letter lay on the table
Unopened
I stared at it for a while
Paced around the kitchen
Deep breath
I took the plunge
Havn't been this scared to open a letter
Since my senior year of high school
It was a monster of a letter
Ten pages double sided hand written
Letters so tightly pressed together
I thought it was one long word
I read it I read it all in one sitting
You told me where you've been all these years
Every little detail of every major event
Your dead end job
How you quit said job
Your marriage
Your divorce
Your year in a small little town in Arizona
How you ended up teaching english in Seatle
It was a lot
It was more than a lot
I walked over to my desk
And I started writing you a letter

Oh this feeling of utter alienation
This endless road trip without a destination
Trapped inside this metal monstrosity of a car
I feel like we haven't made it very far
Constantly around the same round about
Enshrouded in fog made of doubt
I'm endlessly confined
Within the labyrinth of my mind
Shifting corridors, dark spaces
Constant bombardment of familiar faces
I gaze out the tinted windows
And try and figure what no one knows
To try and bypass the security of my brain
To do so and remain sane
To see what cannot be seen
To tap into the source of inspiration

a lady with a tattoo of a foot on her foot.
2. a guy who eat three bananas in a row.
3. an old man with a nose ring like a bull and sea horse earings.
4. a guy wearing a Metalica tank top. patriots pajama pants, flip flops and he was smoking a cigarette.
5. a guy with aviators and a flaming skull tattooed on his throat.
6. a girl with blue hair.
7. a lady trying to run for a train in heels and failing.
8. a guy wearing a hood, a hat and sunglasses. but also shorts.
9. a kid who I recognized from high school but didn't remember his name.
10. a man who started to run for the train about ten seconds in he realized it was futile and started walking again.
11. at least six girls with frozen merchandise.
12. a guy who was towing his backpack in a wheeled cart.
13. Joey cullen and his girlfriend. (they had to catch the 214 bus)
14. four guys who were reading game of thrones books

His scarf flowed harmlessly in the breeze
I stood with him in that collection of trees
His midnight hair was flowing and free
There was no place i'd rather be
In the empty space between us, i positioned my hand
He grabbed it softly, as if every motion, every action was planed.
Inside fireworks burst
This is the first
On the outside, I send him a small smile
He stared into my eyes for a while
I was staring into the depths of the ocean
It seemed like an eternity and then. There was motion
In one fluid motion he closed the distance.
There was no resistance
My body responded in turn
My arms somehow found the right spot, I can't discern
Who's what  is what anymore
His lips find mine, my senses more
Things tighten
I feel enlightened
This moment is so precise
This exact feeling will not happen twice
Then he pulls away.
I'm breathless, I do not know what to say
I feel like I have forgotten how to speak
Without him, I feel a tad weak
His face is red, and all smiles

The long winding roads leading out to the sea
The sun peaking through the steely grey clouds
The dirt on the old roads have barely settled
When the tanks moved through
The wildlife was gone
As tanks plowed through
Through the grassy fields
Soldiers stumbled behind
****** and disoriented
Shots pierce the silence
For one single moment everything is still
As you see the soldiers rise from the fields like spirits from the grave
You see the long cold barrel of a gun pointed down at you
In an instant you see the spark
Then you hear the sound
Then you feel the hot steel ripping through your skin
You look down at the ****** stump that was once your leg
You realize you are on the ground
You see the same scene replayed all down the road
Then you feel the same pain again
and again and again
Till you don't feel anymore

I think I remember you
From the last vestiges of a dream.
Where reality and illusion blur
In between states of mind.
You're a memory of a memory
That one face in the crowd
In a passing car, a crowded train.
A glitch
A ghost
From a different time
From a different life.

Maureen the mean lottery playing machine
when I see her  I mutter something obsene.
sometimes it's seven am on a Saturday morning
and she shows up with no warning.
"ill take a three number on the daily,
I could call her a loser and she can just pay me
behind her there is always a line
and when she buys donuts that's a bad sign
because she's always camping out in her car
And she never goes very far
when she comes back in I can feel my heart sinking
she's my reason to maybe start drinking
"I really have to go shopping"
but not before dropping
more money on tickets  then I make all week
because fortune is what she seeks
she smokes basics but only the hard packs
when she hits the million I hope she doesn't have a heart attack
"these tickets are terrible." she keeps playing
There's a disconnect between what she's saying
and what she does
but that's because
she has a terrible affliction
a gambling addiction
"two brown cash two silver sevens and one golden spin
the odds are stacked against her so she can't win
maybe she can't see
what it looks like to me
she's blinded by a tiny prospect of glory
but sadly this is just one telling of a popular story

I explore an open heart
I celebrate its translucent embrace
It leaks secret deep colours
She surrounds my eternity
I almost remember life
In Poetry I breathe
I slowly drink in the universe
To feel the liquid rhythm never changing
I speak in abstracts and metaphors
I live to express to those who understand
To understand the tangles of the soul and mind

Twisting labyrinthine thoughts
That fork off endlessly
Into impenetrable darkness  
That leads me astray
Away from sleep
Away from solace
A downward spiral
Endless free fall

Talking on the phone is easy
But making phone calls is difficult
Thirty gut wrenching seconds
Heart beat ringing in my ears
Lungs working overtime
Every time the ringing tone resumes
I think its someone answering
My muscles tense
My lips ready to spit out
My already rehearsed lines  
But no one answers
I never leave voicemails
A worse fate is ****** upon me
Anticipating their return call

Nobody is behind me.
Nobody is behind me.
Nobody is behind me.
I double check
I feel my muscles relax
Giving into it
The pressure is rerouted
The valve is momentarily relieved

Thoughts aborted
Wills contorted
Perceptions twisting
Voices persisting
Unnatural courses
Internal forces
Intense moral storms
Light transforms
Into splintered perception
Divine deception
Everything is tainted
Broad strokes are painted
Intense fear of sunlight
Boiling with fright
This darkness is serene
So unholy,so unclean

Being attacked En masse by zubat
Oh excuse me I meant Woobat
Send out my Rapidash
Its a pity it knows flash
I leave a trail of Pokes behind
This is what happens when you grind
Saving up for an expert belt with a buckle
So i can give it to my shuckle
I run into a snorlax
Its ok i relax
I have 99 ultra *****
And one good Stalls
Catch him in no time
Ran into a female Mister Mime
Freaked out i back up into little caterpie
But I already have a butterfree
Spray some repel
Avoid the weepingbell
Make it back to pallet town
Gary and i ready to throw down

Got home from the hospital late last night
Still can't seem to find my appetite
I can't seem to sit still
There's a hole that I don't know how to fill
I've listened to my ipod non stop
Headphones so loud I feel my ears are gonna pop
The dice will fall as they may
But at the end of the day
I know that they were always loaded
I feel like my life has always been encoded
Protected by a cipher I could never completely break
I never truly understood what was at stake
Until that day last week
When you and I were hanging by the creek
We were laughing and tossing rocks
Just relaxing having good long talks
When my vision started to go hazy
and I know this is crazy
But i knew then that I was dying
And you started crying
I felt a sharp tightening in my chest
I lost consciousness as the attack progressed
I woke up in my hospital bed
The doctors told me that I should be dead
They used phrases like "suffered major cardiac event"
I asked what that meant
I told me that I had a heart attack
I was immediately taken aback
I was only seventeen
This was almost something that was unseen
Arrhythmia was the name of the disease
They said it was easy to manage with medicine and their expertise
But now I can no longer rest
Knowing that I have ticking time bomb in my chest

In the depths of my basement
Hidden behind the christmas decorations
And under the family albums
Lies a box waiting to be discovered
It holds a legend from a bygone era
The atari 2600
It may be the grandfather of gaming
But it still plays like it's 1977
It's been going strong for forty years
But my laptop called it quits after five
You have to start with the classics
Like Pacman pitfall and pong
Galaga asteroids and dig dug
All of them in glorious 8 bits
A throwback to simpler times
When there were no updates to download
Nothing to install to the hard drive
12 year Olds didn't mock you online
It was just you and a joystick

Basement dwellers
Midnight cellars
Clinging to our ideals
Replaying the old film reels
Memorizing quotes
Writing down notes
Absorbing every action
Every layer of attraction
So that we can emulate
What we can't stimulate
Our actions are rehearsed
Our speech is well versed
We've made this a science  
And we have developed a reliance
On all these false identities
These self fueled entities
Projections of perfection
A layer of protection
We forget ourselves
Put them up on the shelves
We put on new skins
So we all look like twins
Internally different but all the same

All our words wear winter clothes
Leaving little to expose
The weak sunlight taps on your face
Slow motion seems to be the proper pace

The air is heavy and deep
A stare we love to keep
Snow falling like fluff
sometimes words aren't enough

We stand in the cold
Waiting for our story to unfold
We don't feel the wind blow
Only our warm glow

Under the dim sun light
Only your blue eyes are in sight
My lips in warm bliss
As we share a winter kiss

A warm breath we share
Its a little bit to much to bear
She pulls away, eyes dancing
She gives her house a glancing

She speaks in a quiet voice
We don't have a choice
She pulls away
She can't delay

She give me a shining smile
I stand there for a while
the warmth still there
I trudge home half aware

I lay in my bed
I feel half dead
Smile still on my face
I drift to that familiar place

I want to experience something beautiful. I want to be something Beautiful. But beauty doesn’t just happen. It is earned,it is toiled for.
It is what all decent people want. People are too concerned on what they look like.  If they are too skinny or too fat or smell too like old french fries. No one is really beautiful at first glance. Pure attractiveness does not equal beauty. To me beauty is something deeper. Something much deeper. When one person truly knows someone else that is beautiful. when one person can just be with another and just be satisfied. Just honestly happy by the mere presence of the other. That is beautiful.

I remember that day
When it was too hot to hold hands but we did anyway
And the sunlight was streaming
And our smiles were gleaming
And the sunshine cascaded through your hair
And I remember the water bottle we had to share
The pavement was hot beneath our feet
And you looked so sweet
And we scouted for free air conditioning
And as if by predetermined positioning
We stumbled into a little tea shop
I watched your jaw drop
As I faithfully recited your favorite order
We sat in the booth by the window
That day was slow
We didn't talk much
We didn't need that crutch
I held your hand in mine
Sweet as grapes off the vine
We watch the great blue expanse above
And I remember what it meant to be in love.

The moment is so fleeting
I can hear your heart beating
In this perfect silence
I've developed a realiance
To the frequency of your eyes
Shimmering like the bright blue skies
I listen to your breathing
I think your worth believing

All the birds do sing
They sing about everything and anything
They are simply  hollow words
Sung by cute little birds
Floating through the peoples ears
Bringing smiles and calming fears
The birds work is never done
Because happiness is a loaded gun
But all the birds still fly around
Never allowed to touch the ground
They are to happy for such a fate
They wouldn't make it in the gate
They simply are and that's enough
Made of marshmallows and fluff

The black dragon of the eternal night
Flies over the world of light
It walks the earth enraged
Finally free of its cage
It drains the light from the sky
All that lives is sure to die
The bonds have been broken
The gates of karrin are now open
The blood will run deep
People will forever deep
But a sword will emerge
To enact a purge
To slay the dark
To erase its mark
We cling to this bead of hope
As we measure our rope

Couldn't sleep. Watched the sun rise
It was no surprise
When you showed up
With a big coffee cup
We were sitting on the bleachers
Imitating nocturnal creatures
Your eyes flared
I think you were scared
That I wasn't sleeping
That some problem was creeping
From the background to the foreground
Without a notice or sound
And I wasn't telling you.
Because I refused to believe it was true

Open your eyes and look around
Let all the colors seep through you
Let the warmth spread its all you can do
Help your feet off the ground

And just fly fly fly
And see were being leaded by the blind
It time to leave them behind
Time to ask why?

Every storm must end
You just have to see hot to get out
Eyes age, our eyes are fresh see past their doubt
Who knows whats around the bend

In the end everyone goes blind
Before you do look around one last time
See the colors feel the warmth. see the lack of grime
Then let the young see and mold there minds

Cars fly by on the highway,becoming nothing but blurs.
They race to one place or another,some don't even have anywhere to go.
They just go unknowingly to where they think they will be more happy.
The blurs cease to exist,trading all there freedoms for more fuel to nowhere.
They try to escape there life by going on meaningless trips to nowhere
never going home to where they belong and be truly happy.
People in these cars cease to have any real contact with the world relying on technology
They've traded the joys of hearing laughter and the rhythm of a good conversation for meaningless text and acronyms.
They've ceased to be people at all.
The world became drones only focused on there next trip to nowhere.
No people walk the earth only drones in their cars, becoming blurs...

Borrowed time and dying love
He craves an answer from above
He  sits with himself alone
Curled up on his bed with his phone
He stares at the bright screen
Wondering what it could mean
He is lost
He gazes at the falling frost
A harsh wind blows
He forgets all he knows
The warm touch of sunshine
The laughs of a good time.
He hides in a cocoon of sheets
Mindlessly checking status updates and tweets
He wishes for a sign
To see everything fine.
He soon falls asleep
Falling into forests dark and deep.

Emotion rising
Drafts Revising
Words rearranging
Underlying emotion unchanging
I'm a tangles mess
Under stress
Pulse quickening
It's sickening
The words won't form
This can't be the norm
It looks so easy
But all I feel is queasy
In my mind it seems so clear
But in my mouth it is only fear
You stare at me with your big brown eyes
You're munching on french fries
I feel the words weight on my tongue
A love song that refuses to be sung
I shall wait until tomorrow
Till I find some words to borrow

The world is a blank slate
To express share and relate
Love is all, love is you
Always believe in what you do
Fly high, fly free
Never fear to be what you aspire to be
Break loose, burn through the haze
Live fully for the rest of your days

I imagined your touch
It was almost too much
And the wind screamed
And I no longer dreamed
Of soft lies
Only foreign skies
Alien landscapes that stretch on forever
And my grip on reality starts to sever
Yesterday I thought I saw you across the street
I looked down at my feet
Too scared to look in your direction
Unwilling to spread the infection
That is locking eyes
Because in them I see a thousand other guys
Five minutes later, I realized it wasn't you
That nothing my eyes tell me is true
Its scary to think
That everything is written in disappearing ink
I'm starting to slip
I'm losing my grip
I can't keep track of the days
Its all a never ending haze
Strange scenes
Never ending dreams
Ever briefer spasms of lucidity
I'm losing all validity

I'm really sorry
That I broke your atari
You look at me with ****** brewing in your eyes
And a boiling rage that you just can't disguise
You mutter "Mint condition 1977"
And how you had it since you were eleven
You hold your game cartridges lovingly in you hands
And say that know one understands
I'm gonna be sleeping with one eye open tonight

You ask me about matters of the heart
Yet i don't know where to start
My heart strings are all wild
Strangling me like a loving child
Love is air and I'm starting to turn blue
So i don't know what to tell you
Perspectives change and twist
And the field is covered in mist
We all stumble about half blind
To see what exactly we can find
Find, love, experience and hold on
Hold on till the love is gone
Some candles burn quicker
Flare out like good liquor
The rare candles burn forever
People spend their entire live on this endeavor
Stumbling around the mists for that one pure light

Hair blowing in the breeze
Smiles put on with ease
Her voice are waves on the shores of my ears
Continuously wearing down my fears.
We walk down this winding street
We leave navigation to our feet
Our heads are in the clouds
Where smile to much and talk to loud
The clouds are cotton candy and the sun is a butterscotch
No time, no watch
Just you and me
To the end of eternity whenever that may be.

A head on collision
Just outside my frame of vision
A disaster in slow motion
as the car rams a guard rail by the ocean

People screaming, everything froze
I saw the drivers face
In her eyes she knows
this is the end of the race

A self imposed finish line
Straight into the salty brine

I walked down the well worn path
As the sun climbed up the sky
Light seeped through the trees
And the heat pressed down on me

There was a large rock off to the side
Like it was placed there just for weary hikers
I climbed on top of the rock
And sat there for awhile

There was something carved on the side
"Kate+Roger summer of 87"
A day, a relationship, an act of love
Forever memorialized in stone

I wondered if they are still together
If thirty years later they come back here and laugh
Or maybe only one of them does
And smiles a bittersweet smile

In the sandbox in which we all play
And the wind blows as it does every day
Shifting all the grains
Shifting under the strains
All these castles made of sand
Simply can not stand
The tides will swallow them into the sea
What is can never eternally be
They all rise and fall
With the breath of the universe that defines us all.

I inscribe my poems in chalk  
Scribble them on the pavement
Even though tomorrow it will rain
Because in the fleeting moment of its existence
I hope a stranger will stumble upon it
And be moved by the random encounter

A draft floats down the hall
All the floor boards groan
The leaves are turned, its fall
The birds have all flown
Its time to change
Were just made of lines of words
To simply exist is so strange
Striking so many different chords
Wishing you could sleep your troubles away
To dream a new land
To make it a new and exciting day
To hear a new band
No longer the same boring routine
But that is neither here nor there  
We are still here in this scene
Living with the utmost care
But the winds of change are blowing
And dreams are but the blueprints for life
So let the dreams start flowing
No time for such strife

Stale cigarette smoke
Lingers longer than you did
Half a pack of death
Half a pack of relief
Clings to my sheets
Like a ghost refusing
to be exorcised

They are shadows with knives
When one lives, all survive
Numbers uncountable, faces unknowable
The banner of peace rendered unsewable
It lies in pieces among the dead
The city hangs from a single thread
Enemies within, enemies without, soon blood will stain the land
It comes together like the cogs of a machine i don't understand.
I sit here in the flickering candle light
Listening for any sound of a fight
I hide in a cocoon of blankets
I am starving, while fat nobles hold banquets
Soon i will feel the cold embrace of death
And i will breathe my last breath
But that day is not today
If the gods are good, it will be far away
I hear shouting and screaming without warning
In the distance i hear people mourning
I crawl out my measly shack
The peasants are at the gates and will not turn back
As one voice they scream for freedom
But most are reduced to martyrdom
The guards let blood
And the people become a flood
A sea of bodies rushing the gates
I see this and thank the fates
Riding the wave
I rush towards my grave.

I pulled out my old lighter
And lit a cigarette
The night got a little brighter
As I tried to forget
All the lies that you love to tell
As you pull me down
Into our own personal hell
I can’t take this tiny town
We've taken to drinking
Because we've run out of things to say
I can feel that were sinking
That everything will fall apart any day
But now we have liquor
To make it all go quicker
And you're always screaming
That I need to stop dreaming
And get my head out of the clouds
So we can get out of these crowds
But you have to know that's *******
We're addicted to each other and we can't quit
Now its just mutual destruction
A product of our own construction  
We are a collapsing binary star
Strangely beautiful when viewed from afar