You're messaging me back
*Finally

Fresh breathe of coffee beans
Clinging and clinking of fine china mugs
Quiet Whisper’s; typing of keyboards pages flipping; sighs from about

At the coffee café
I will make a choice on a stupid ******* book about the love within one.
Maybe I’ll read about a dinosaurs’ life even though every single **** right now hasn’t even seen one.
I could read about death and get more depressed or leave the coffee café for another wasted day.

I walk outside the coffee café to chirping lullabies and cars pacing by. I lay on the grass with the book of my choice: One fish, Two fish, Red fish, Blue fish; Yes, I know Im a 16 year old girl with dark brown skin, sophisticated clothing reading a Dr. Seuss book, SUE ME; but let me be free for this rhyming time of Dr. Seuss and this stupid thing I have going on.

****
i know its typical but
i wish you still looked at me like you did
your eyes are an ocean
and im lost at sea
i forgot how to swim.

i know its typical but
i'd swallow poison
if it tasted like you.
especially
if it tasted like you.

i know its typical but
it feels like you were the only drug i need
popping painkillers never compared to
you.

i know its typical but
feeling your lips felt like
being giddy, high, drunk
you were ***** when the times got rough.

i know its typical but
i miss you

I sliced my wrist at 11:03
I’m sorry I left you
It’s too much for me
I apologized to you as I hurt myself repeatedly

I apologized to the people I feel hate me
Drama ***** my heart dry
When I have to clean my wrist every night

I’m sorry that I was a waste
But you really were my thought of day

I wish it didn’t have to end this way
But my last goodbye will be in my head
I cut too deep into your heart; I will save you the trouble and stab my arm

I’m sorry
But I’m leaving pretty soon;
Hopefully you’ll never see me again

I still love you

**The End