For so long all I wanted,
was to be lying here awake at one in the morning
knowing that I could safely roll over
to your sweet side
smell your chest and know that home
was wherever your face was.

For so long all I wanted,
was too have so much to say to you
knowing that with just one look in my direction
you wouldn't even have to ask,
because truth was
you already knew.

For so long all I wanted
was you, back to back to back again to you.
Back to when our skin was stronger
and our eyes were shut wider.
For so long all I wanted
was you, back to back to back again to you.

But the more I think about it,
contemplate the consequences of fighting for you
again and again and again.
The more I realize that what I want
is not just to get back to back to back again to you
but to go back again
to when you  were you.

For so long all I wanted,
was you. But you've only become a memory
a faded pixel in the kaleidoscope of my life
a chipped shoulder in my base.
a lover that was meant to be erased.

I love the way I fool you
into thinking I'd actually let you for one moment
step inside my bathtub while I was in the shower.
But even more than that,
I love the way I think of you
if you actually did come into my shower.
How lovely your wet skin would feel against mine.
How I'd like so very much to shampoo your curly hair.
How I'd like to tell you you're beautiful,
and how I'd kiss you quickly when you'd deny it.
How your kiss would feel against my neck
as little droplets poured down my skin like rain.
How your tongue would feel inside my mouth,
a steamy embrace that would taste just a little
bit like Dove soap and mint toothpaste.
How your fingers would feel entangling in my hair,
or how your chest would feel against my breast.
How the sound of the pressure hitting the curtain
would only stimulate the chemical reaction
happening in the limited space we allowed between our two bodies.
How we'd mold into one.
How much time we'd waste arguing about my singing,
even though deep down I agreed I was awful.
I just like to argue with you.
How I'd hypnotize you with my kiss to get you to comb my hair,
to rinse the conditioner out of it.
How slippery my fingers would be trying to trace your lips,
with you trying your best not to smile.
How many times you'd fail at trying to blow bubbles
with a bit of soap between your palms.
Or how many times I'd catch you staring at me
while you were getting lost in the sound of my laugh.
How when we saw the foggy mirrors you'd draw silly faces
while I drew baby hearts.
How you'd tell me I was stupid for believing in those fantasies,
and I'd just  laugh because I know bottomless inside you believe it in.
You believe in love.
You believe in our love.
You believe in loving me.
How when we were finished you'd try to sneak into my towel,
and I'd run away secretly begging you to catch me.
I'd run straight into the bedroom, taking a retreat up to the headboard,
and how you'd crawl up after me.
How instantly you'd wrap your arms around me, still naked
your wet lips breathing right into mine.
How my soaked hair would feel against your skin,
how it would chill you, and I'd smooth down the goose bumps like a game
Like a game I only play with you.
How it would only be you.
How I only ever want it to be you.

Pride
The sin from which all others arise
Like the ocean from which dinosaurs came
A feeling so delightful it must be sin
The feeling I get
When I tell others
About
You

Envy
How can you be just that beautiful
You're a spider silk spiral of shining eyes and glowing heart
I'm a bitter rebellion with everything to lose
A smile graces your lips while profanity steals mine

Greed
You, you, and you
An auction of hearts and I want them all
A symphony of I love you's and ringing laughs
I want you all to myself but that's
A bit
Much

Gluttony
You ignited in me a fire that ravaged
Every *****, bone and tissue
Spreading from my heart to my stomach to my mind
I want to devour you
To hear you cry
For me
Alone

Sloth
The silence in winter and the drizzling spring rain
Can no better describe
How I long to lie with you
Our bodies melting together like church candles
A prayer of quiet touches and sinful words
But no movement
Just us

Wrath
Who has done this to you
You've been wronged and dear god save me because
My blood is on fire for a stranger
A boiling in my veins struggling to escape
By means of tongue and nail and teeth
The one who's hurt you
Forever stilled

Lust
I crave you
Every nerve in my body is electrified and your touch
Is all I need to release the storm
I need you in the most primal way
A chorus of gasps and groans and high pitched words
Frenzied movements unplanned and unspoken

You are a sin

But I am seven

one morning changed the lives of 280 million people

one moment ended the lives of 44

10:03 on a Tuesday morning
in the fall of an American dream
a man is doing what he knows is right
on flight 93

four righteous men gave their all
on that tragic morning
one was deemed a lesser hero because
of who he chose to love

Loved his mom and he loved his dad
loved his home and he loved his man
but on that ****** Tuesday morning
he died an American

he bled red, white and blue
he died for his country
his courage stained the grass
and yet his bravery was not as
valuable as the other three heroes
because of whom he chose to
spend his life with

Even though he could not marry
Or teach your children in our schools
Because who he wants to love
Is breaking your God's rules

40 innocent american's crashed into
pennsylvanian soil that morning
4 monsters crashed landed
straight to hell
4 men saved hundreds of lives that day
four men
not three

He stood up on a Tuesday Morning
In the terror he was brave
And he made his choice and without a doubt
A hundred lives he must have saved

he was denied marriage to
the man he loved
he was denied by your god
he was denied his rights
but he never denied his country protection

And the things you might take for granted
Your inalienable rights
Some might choose to deny him
Even though he gave his life

the land of the free and
home of the brave became
the land of silence and
home of tragedy that morning
and the dismissal of a man's valor
was a part of that tragedy

Can you live with yourself in the land of the free
And make him less of a hero than the other three
Well it might begin to change ya
In a field in Pennsylvania

bravery is the same color
on everybody's hands;
it's not black nor white;
gay nor straight;
man nor woman;
courage is in the blood of every american

Stand up America
Hear the bell now as it tolls
Wake up America
It's Tuesday Morning
Let's roll

september 11th, 2001 was a day of unimaginable cruelty

our land was desecrated and our safety was shattered and our families were broken

never forget

  
                                           *m.k.