Grey clouds consume my mind,
Fills it with a deadly poison,
My heart feels as if it is shrinking and the pain is excruciating,
I can not hold it in,
I can not pretend that I am not hurt,
I can not lie to myself and say "It is nothing",
I can not because I am human and I feel everything,
I began to think and think of the black abyss I contain,
I can not stop thinking and I hate it,
I hate it so much,
"Stop, stop, stop"
But I can not stop feeling
I can not,
Then, I break into infinite pieces
I try to grab each piece
But there are too many and the baggage is too heavy and
I fall.

-Susan

“no,” i beg, latching onto your arm, “please, don’t go.”

you don’t even look at me. this was your fault, and you’re doing, yet i’m begging for you to stay with me.

“i can’t,” you whisper, wiping a tear from my face as you stare at my swollen lips.

“can’t what?” i ask.

“i can’t love you anymore.”

“yes, you can. why wouldn’t you be able to?” i ask, panicked. i try to meet your eyes but you won’t stop staring at my lips. your hands trail down my back and squeeze my hips.

“no, i just don’t love you anymore.”

i can't sleep.

the thought of you beside me is
possibly older than the night herself,
with only mere daydreams
to fill your absence.

who would've known
that you could feel so homeless,
in the comfort
of your own bed?

We want options but hate making choices.
Looking up to others waiting for their voices.
Easily swayed when someone claims.
This is the right one, no one to blame.

Dating, living, food it is all the same.
The abundance just makes it a game.
Who, what, where fits us best.
Giving up on the original moving onto the rest.

How to pick one and be happy.
When you are just another fish in the sea.
Not hunting for what you need.
Clouded by objects, luxuries.

They say lovebirds only need each other.
Fluff their feathers and stay together forever.
We are no different, no need for royalty.
Just make a decision and keep some loyalty.