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my heart
seems to stop
when i notice your
smile
for a second
i've lost my chance
to breathe
i'm drowning
in your
eyes
and i can't
think of a better
way to
die
she's clawing out her eyes
to see that you were
never there to begin with
How can i even begin to tell you how bad this has ****** me up.
I dont know the words to tell you.
and even if i did would you hear what im saying?
or be too busy lost in each other's eyes,
while i am lost in the dark
how long more till this feeling goes away cause i cant keep crying like this. its been too many days and i dont know how long i can hold up anymore. I cant eat, i cant sleep. nothing. Please just make it stop.
have you benefited from me?
this friendship
this love
is there anything more i can give you?
so your heart
i can touch

you try
everyday
and i know that it gets tough
but distance would mean the world to me
if only you understood that much

i know what its like in your shoes
trust me
i know
i do
but i also know that this is the only way
to stop me from hurting you

to answer your question
you have
ive learnt that sometimes the truth
can only serve to break someone
and so ill keep lying to you

your life cannot benefit from my honesty
and something i know too well
is that sometimes people grow better
without me
sometimes i just shouldnt tell

im sorry i know you dont understand
and perhaps you never will
but my heart it hurts for you everyday
but soon youll learn to tell your heart
"be still"
I know you dont understand right now. but someday i pray you will. Im sorry Luke.
every love song i listen to is always dedicated to you
 Dec 2014 Mason Wesley Skaggs
L
You are like the sea. Men will try to conquer you, they will claim to fall in love with you, try to tame you, even bury themselves in your depths; you will swallow anything that threatens your greatness. You, like the sea, not only deserves respect but commands it.

2. When a man calls you out your name, remember that "*****" is just another word for woman who dares to speak her mind. These words are daggers aimed at your throat to cut out your voice, when they use them against you, speak louder. Scream, yell, howl, let your voice be the one sound he fear the most. You cannot be silenced.

3. Love hard. Love everything. Love yourself. Love your work. Love your heart. Love your skin. Love the rain. Love the night. Love fearlessly. Let your love be thick, but once you stop loving something...or someone, don't force it.

4. You cannot experience intimacy without a measure of vulnerability. Don't be afraid of being vulnerable. It will hurt and it will get your heart racing; the feeling in the pit of your stomach will threaten to knock you over but let it happen. Vulnerability allows you to rid yourself of the poisons you've consumed from passed hurts and heartbreaks. Let the vemon leave your bloodstream, let healing take it's place.

5. They never tell you that it's fine to be comfortable with reservation. This is probably the hardest feat. Being comfortable with the fear and the doubt you feel when you step out of your comfort zone is the bravest thing you can accomplish. Embrace it, assess it and if you feel like it's too overbearing, walk away.
this is a work in progress, more to come
I bite my nails
when I'm nervous
but I took what I had
and painted them red
to match my blood.

They say red is a sensual color
They say it is ****.
But all I see in red
Is blood and drowned hopes and pain,
But maybe pain is ****.
It's oh so beautiful for the sadist to watch me fall apart.
My fingers barely connect with the keys
Making letters appear in perfectly straight lines,
Misspellings automatically corrected,
Bland sentences erased and replaced

If I ever wrote as well as I intended to
I would work for my words harder than
they've worked for me
I would form thoughts in shallow trenches
Working out every letter, digging the flow
Reopening blisters and blinking on stinging sweat,
if I ever wrote as well as I intended to

Let my verses stretch the length of the valley
Giving the earth a fraction of what
she has given to me
Let them climb the cliffs, bleeding
nubs of fingers guiding their path
Let my words fall to the sky in towers of smoke

And when I am finished
Let them be swallowed, corroded, and filled
Let them dissipate and separate, for no one else
will I ever write as well as I intend to
I shot a man
Erupted his brain into shreds
Shattered his slack jaw with my booted heel, they
laughed when his blood spilled,
flowing and simmering on the summer cement
Who do you trust?

If we could quit and begin again
If my actions had no consequence
If you were able to mask your true identity
If everyone only chased impulsive pleasure
Would we live differently?

I am afraid
that we are sinking
I am certain that we will slowly
poison ourselves until we become immune

Justifying our acquired weaknesses, ruining any and all friendly competition
Ignoring flags on the play that say there are too many
players on the defensive line

Who told you that this is real?
Trapped in one body for the entirety of this consciousness cannot
persuade me that I am here

Take me into the
vastness of smeared pink and blue
Where the birds find

a place to disappear
Lighten this heart of mine, let
me float where winds are

born, where the noise is
lost so that I may feel as
alone as I am,

truly

May I be excused?
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