we had

a training wheel

love affair.


never quite

certain of
the balance of

our relationship

or feelings.


we were

a little too

tuff, we were

a little to

Evil kienevil

in love.


everything

had a first love

grace about

it.

love's blinders

were taken off.


and for awhile

we ran

like wild horses

in each other's

hearts.


we could barely

catch our

breath.


and then

it happened.

we became

things that

you never play

with again.


I fell,

you fell.

and there was

nobody there

to stop our

fall. and


then at fourteen

years old I learned

unfortunately,


things you never

play with again.


can sometimes
be people...

She untangles
from around
me,

like a
ball of
cheap

drunken

yarn.

then finds
her way
down our
bedroom
stairs.

upon reaching
the bottom

she throws
away a
glance

in my
general
direction.


much like
a person
waiting on

a bench
for a bus

would do,


when they
see a

car go by

then realize,


there is
no one

in it that
they really
know
or care
about.


it is just

a courtesy


"I think I

might know

you nod."


no need for

I love you's

this morning.


good-bye will

suffice.


and this
evening

when the
bus comes

to bring
her back..


It will
find me
waiting,


like a

wooden

drugs store

indian

at the
bottom

of the
stairs

eager to

meet her
there.

every day

right on

time.


it is not

so much
a game

we play,


as it

it has
become
instead.

a almost

lifeless

existence a


scare crows

ritual we
act..


biding time.
every morning
we awake.


sleep walking

love through

our day.

never
realizing,


we never
had anywhere
to go

to begin

with.

This morning

while holding your

note in my

hand.


the sun

fell unexpectedly

full somersaults

from the sky.

a fiery pinwheel

of downward

motion.


a molten

avalanche

of gigantic

proportions.

crashing all

around me,

as I sat

at my

morning table

eating my Monday

ritual

of oatmeal

and wheat bread.


abiding to

doctors orders

like an old dog

trying to be

taught new

tricks.


now uncertain

of what is to

become of me,



I know only

one thing

for sure.


I would of

loved you

one more day

with all my heart,


if you

would

of let

me.

With patience he caressed my heart
His filthy hands gleefully left
Sticky black ink stains
He told me they would always remain

With determination I cut my heart out
My tainted hands painfully ripped
At blood filled sinew and muscle
I told him it would be like he never existed and grabbed a shovel

© 2013-2014 Peach

She said "I'm falling in love."

I said "I'm falling apart."