Your appreciation
Means more to me
Than any gift in return

This world is getting a bit too much for me
there are only so many times i can cry over my laptop keyboard
then worry my tears will damage it

I am so sad
I don't deserve to be sad
I sat watching a soccer match while people were massacred last night

There are elephants crying after being freed from 50 years of torturous captivity
Elephants only live for 70 years

Why was I born into this
not everyone was meant to live here
not everyone is hard enough

I am a good person, I know this
I can help people
but I will **** myself in the process
am I a coward or brave?
Do I want to be either?

My best friend is leaving me and I have cried every night while listening to Coldplay since she told me

There is a chance I am autistic, obvious enough to someone who has met me once, while my mother never picked this up
my whole life has been spent thinking I am slow, stupid, socially inept
she could have picked this up

she could have raised me whole

That text,
That call,
That's all it takes,
For the air to thin
And the mouth to dry
As the blood pressure breaks.

Palms are sweaty.
Knees are weak.
All in a moment,
The future seems bleak.

Thoughts are clouded.
Eyes go blind.
The ground pulls down
And arms are tied, useless to climb.

Body trembles with deep,
burning what ifs.
Memories resurface
As the past is relived.

But the voice within,
The weapon was ready,
Calming the breathes and heart,
Making all become steady.

Though I am stronger now,
Thanks to the time.
I'm still yours,
Even if you're not mine.

I adore the way my skin looks with yours.
Milky white against your caramel complexion.
Soft is the touch of love,
Yet heated by passion.
Pink lips part to taste,
Flesh so desirable.
I'd like to press upon you,
Souls intertwined.
Breath and beating hearts become our own music.
Time is still,
Worries lost....
You Are my Only focus.
Gently tracing curves with the lightest of finger tips.
Pushing the hair back from my face, Eyes meet,
A gaze that's held with looking beyond what's visibly seen.
Love lacks the true form of my heart colliding with yours.