a withered plant
can't flourish in winter
but we couldn't wait for spring

am i not worth the effort
anymore?
am i not worth trying for
anymore?
are we not worth improving for
anymore?
am i asking for
too much?
am i settling for
less?
i know
we cannot be perfect
but is not our love
worth reaching that for?
im not sure how much
i can take
any more
hurt
and any less
effort
can our love still last through
or is it just me?

My Love, oh how i miss you so
how the days go faster,
but time seems so slow
like a never-ending waterfall,
flowing, but with nowhere to go.

sometimes it feels like waves-
sombre tides upon the ocean.
but sometimes they feel like shockwaves,
jolts of electricity, and of overwhelming emotions.
My Love, oh how i miss you so
please make the days go faster,
and light our Love that was once aglow.

there was a young girl
who knew so little
yet felt so much
such strong emotions
she did not think of as unusual
but as she knew more and more
of the things she was not aware of before
she started to wonder
perhaps she was better off feeling nothing at all
for when you have felt so low
you know you can only feel so high
and that when you are at the bottom of it all
why even ever try to fly?

struck
like a deer
in the headlights
stuck
like a fool
in the moonlight

I wish I knew how it felt
To feel so strongly for someone
To see something so special
Invisible to the world
To be so immersed
To be so blinded
That you see nothing else
But one
Though the fear within me
Keeps me from hoping
From wanting it so fully
Wishing I could just reach out
And find my hand
Entwined with another
Tangled by fate
Or perhaps by something more special
That when the fear of falling
Seems nothing
And that when you land
You land without hurting

run away now
without knowing where to go
head towards the light
blinded by what it cannot show
say goodbye now
away from all the sorrow
run away now
it doesn't matter where you go

what sad path we walk on
        longing for things that can never be
                      stuck from where we wish to flee

a sad pair of human beings
connected under the same sky
but never to each other

I ask myself,
when?
when will i stop hurting?
when will i stop feeling?
when will i stop loving?
stop myself from loving you?
if only there was a way
to erase the memory etched into my heart
like a scar that will always remind me
of how much i loved you
and of how i thought you did, too
I ask myself,
why?
why did i start loving you?
why did you make me feel that you did, too?
why did i not notice it?
notice that you said you loved me
only to break me into tiny little pieces
so small that i can never put myself back together again
how i can never relive our memories together
without that sinking feeling in my chest
that all of it was a lie
I ask myself
a million questions
about how and where i went wrong
a million questions
of what had happened to us
and of what will
to me
without you
I ask myself
was it all for love
or was it all for tragedy?

my heart will cry for you
until tears turn to blood
until time stops and all the worlds stop spinning
until there is nothing left to love
still, my heart will cry for you
until all stars stop shining
until every living things stop breathing
and until all songs stop playing
my heart will always cry for you
forever does not exist
but my love for you is everlasting
you can break my heart
you can break everything
you can even break me, tear me into pieces
until all of me ceases to exist
until my calls stop reaching you
until my lungs stop breathing for you
you can take everything from me
you can even take away my sanity
but not until you make me stop loving you
not until then
will my heart stop crying for you

it's getting windy, it's getting cold
          i wait and wait for stories to unfold

                   but there was no such thing to be told
     just my chilled hands waiting for you to hold

i write about love
yet i know nothing of it
i dream about love
yet i know i will never get it
not the kind of love
your parents give you
nor the kind of love
your friends show you
i crave that kind of perfect love
that will make your heart feel infinite
that the warm feelings
that you cannot possibly put into words
would feel like it would
never end
that kind of perfect love
that would make your skin
feel like electricity
every time you touch
you feel a shoc-
no
that kind of love that
would make you feel
like a thunderstorm
bright and painful
yet a beautiful kind of pain
that you would willingly so
stand in the middle of a rain
i crave that kind of perfect love
that whenever you feel like
falling apart
you know someone will be there
waiting for you
to fall into their arms
and never let go
but who am i to talk about
love
when i can only
write, dream, and crave
that perfect love
i know nothing of

"I don't hear anything"
"I don't feel anything"
These words I keep repeating
as I hear and feel everything
at the same time, nothing.
I hear nothing
yet the pain is so loud.
I feel so numb and empty
yet there is a sharp pain in my chest.
These words, I keep repeating to myself.
"I'm okay."

One look at you and
I saw the smile on your face
reflect the starlights.

i'd write a hundred poems for you
i'd play a thousand songs
i'd listen to you talk
for hours and hours
wait until either one of us
falls asleep
i'd tell you everything
how your dimple shows when you smile
how you make me smile
all the time
how you make me feel
all of these emotions
that only you can put in my heart
how you make me feel
so insecure
and beautiful at the same time
i'll tell you
how much i want to hug you
to kiss you
to be in your arms
to let you know that
i'll always be here for you
until you get tired of me
i'll tell you i love you
again and again
and again
i'd do all these things for you
i'd do it all
i'd do it all a million times
just to show you
how much i miss you
and how much
i love you

The world has not ended.

But, to her, it seems like it has.

She's beaten and wounded;

She wanted it to stop.

A semicolon-

Her story is far from done.

But, before it reaches the end,

She has already had enough.

The pain is black and white
It's there but it's not
I can feel it, I'm hurting
But I'm numb
It hurts
But my heart  is so used to it
It seems like I'm okay
But I know that I'm not
I need someone to save me
But I don't want anybody to know
I'm fine, I say
I'm too numb to feel the pain