I woke up,
Mid-January,
The light hit him just right,
He looked almost holy.
I traced,
His parted lip,
Felt the softness,
Before I pressed mine.
I breathed in,
The intoxicating aroma,
It smelled like him,
And clean linens.
He woke up,
Mid-January,
The light hit him just right,
He looked almost holy.

"There is no sense in breathing,"
It was written on the wall,
In the ***** truck stop bathroom,
That made my skin crawl.
I scrubbed my hands,
And left in a scurry,
But the quote stained my skin,
Now red from fury.
"There is no sense in breathing,"
It rang in my head,
As I sped down the highway,
Now why would someone wish to be dead?
The thought spun my brain,
I didn't believe that someone so beautiful, Would be so insane.
But they were,
And they are,
And that's what it meant.
There's no sense in breathing,
If you're already dead.

9,
I was invaded,
A personal space to be kept hidden,
Was shattered with the memories,
Of the father hovering above me.
11,
I was invaded,
My brain tracing the outlines,
Of models curves,
While I refused to eat in the presence of others.
16,
I was invaded,
A duck and weave,
As I avoided the fist,
Of my boyfriend's tensed muscles.
17,
I refuse to be invaded,
My lungs a dark red,
Screaming for me as I defend myself,
And it all stops.
I was not invaded.
- M.Y.

For a person,
Whom spends the majority of,
Their night hours in their own head,
The task of falling into a deep slumber,
Is by all definitions,
Strenuous.
I wish to sleep,
My eyelids grow heavy,
My temperature drops,
But my mind does not silence,
My clock does not stop.
And when I wake,
From a sleep I can't quite remember,
Finding,
My mind is still running.

The heat from a breath
Formed a dysfunctional circle
On the glass parallel to my face
As I gasp at the drop off below me.
The empty space below my foot
Catches in my heart
The rapid beat shakes my rib cage
As I swing the appendage in semicircles.
Suddenly,
I
F
A
L
L.
- M.Y.