I am as a leaf in the river
flowing down tributaries
dew drops are my sweat and tears
winds billow and brush against me
while waters swirl beneath

whether I was in turbulence
or dancing wild
was my choice

I see it only now

as I traverse the waters
I meet many others
each with their own paths
own pasts
own histories
own stories

was it me who crossed their paths
or them mine?
who amongst leaves, you and I
could judge, or would say,
“that is a life well-lived”
when we are ceaselessly
ushered current upon currents

out

to the great beyond

there is no love
love has melded with the rain
and flowed from my cheek

there is no love
love has been confined
to the pictures we took

there is no love
love that a careless word
we forgot to say

i love you
.
means nothing
is nothing
and leads to nothing

We bring around little worlds
searching
colliding
hoping that someone
will share the same skies
in our little worlds
It doesn't hurt that much.

We carry our little worlds
against the great big one outside
and when we find
that
this big world is both more and less beautiful
than ours
reality hits us
You'll see it if you know where to look.

We cover our little worlds
our faces smiling
a facade
a breakwater
against the waves
of which
some call fate
some call living
It's okay. Even when it's not.

We hide within our little worlds
a part of us
to others unknown
our little paradise
of sands from eternal shores
in it we find peace in chaos
without we find chaos, even in peace
What we don't know can't hurt us.

We live in our little worlds
against the cruelties
of reality
of responsibility
of expectations
and of disappointments
we closed it too slowly
it has seeped in somehow
Sshhh.

And then I find

we are our little worlds
whether darkness
or in light.

no longer will i follow
creatures of convenience
trail of red petals
disguised as blood

though your name i cannot forget
regret
may haunt every line
i will etch it on paper

till the essence seeps into fibre
ink on paper
thoughts on soul
what i could give is never enough