Diba - Hello Poetry

Diba Apr 2015

My thoughts are a tangled mess of love letters scattered all over your apartment floor
give me a lighter
i want to burn it all down
the hole you tore in my heart has been empty for months
please
come home

#love #poem #poetry #sad #depression #life #heart #pain #death #you

Diba Apr 2015

sic transit gloria, glory fades

The first time I realized that I could love you enough to break me, lightning split the sky.
How’s that for a sign?
But i did not let myself love you.
I have missed the you that wanted me for long enough; you can either miss the me that wanted you or not, but it doesn't matter.
I will want myself -
I will want better for myself.
This morning when I woke, I could swear for a split-second that you were next to me.
I could have sworn I turned around to see you waking up, giving me a sleepy smile and pulling me close.
The sky was pale with the clouds that hung with their tears.
I hope those were tears of joy.
I still dream of you/
The memories still haunt me. Sometimes they’re so strong that they hit me like a brick.
I could still remember how you held my hand.
What your embrace felt like. What your smile looked like.
I could write you a thousand letters and none would really repeat how I feel towards you.
You know that. But I am unsure if there are any words left in me for you.
It feels like I have said all that I could possibly want or need to say in this way.
I could swear that your story is etched in my skin; you fill me with purpose - you were my purpose. My heart carries a profound ache for you

#love #poem #poetry #sad #depression #life #heart #pain #death #you

Diba Apr 2015

2/100

I try to avoid going to lonely places.
This lonely place is sometimes just a feeling, or a thought—but one that is able to drive me close to insane.
On the rare occasion that this lonely place is actually something bearable, there is nothing else I feel but your presence.
That day I first met you, it might seem silly but- it was my first day at the new school, and you were the first to smile at me.
It made me really really happy.
I’m saying this now; you mean a lot to me.
We’ll forget each other, we’ll forget that we ever spent a day together. And that’s fine by me, as long as we both hold ourselves steady.
You are the only lonely place I’m not afraid to visit.

#love #poem #poetry #sad #depression #life #heart #pain #death #you

Diba Apr 2015

A list of things i can't tell you

I will be honest with you, most days i wake up and my first though is you.
2. I’ve spent days in my thoughts, waiting for someone’s smile to open the door; and there you were- I’ve been waiting for you.
3. And all the songs i’ve been listening to finally made sense, i never thought they would.
4. You’re my 4.am thoughts. You have been for the past year.
5. Oh my god i love you more than you will ever know.
6. I never know what to say and i’m sorry, but if i could even find the courage to say something it would be “please don’t get tired of me.”
7.I love you, i love you so ******* much. You will always be my insomnia, my lat night thoughts.
8.I adore you.
9.I know i get annoying and i frustrate you a lot, thank you for putting up with me.
10.I will always be in some kind of love with you, i hope you know that.
11. I still love you at 4.am
12. I fell in love with you, you don’t have to love me back. But i gave you my heart, please be gentle.
13. 4 shots later and the only name i manage to slur out is yours.
14. All the songs make sense now, they were about you.

#love #poem #poetry #sad #depression #life #heart #pain #death #you

Diba Apr 2015

1/100

words that turned your eyes into oceans
glances that broke my heart into pieces
smiles that cracked my bones
you still have my heart
you always will

#love #poetry #sad #life #pain #sadness #death #hope #thoughts #you

Diba Apr 2015

For you my heart, ripped from my chest

Look, if we start fighting again please just pull out the knives you've been hiding under your pillow for so long,
and go right for my ******* heart.
Please just hurt me like you did that night i thought you were the love of my life but i ended up walking home with shaky hands and blood stained fingernails as if i'd been scratching on a wall with your words all over it
i want to feel the pain in my heart one last time
because i know you don't love me anymore
i need to feel the pain in my heart one last time
so i know it's real

#love #heartbreak #poem #poetry #sad #depression #life #thoughts #you

Diba Apr 2015

Home

I’m sorry i tried to make a home out of you
used your bones as shelter
hid my insecurities under your skin;
my jealousy under your tongue
I’m sorry i wrote all over your skin to reassure myself that you still loved me.
I’m sorry i tried to light a fire in your heart to keep myself warm
And when you left,
i felt homesick
your words bled through my heart and cracked my ribs
nights of walking home alone trying not to throw myself into traffic.
This morning a friend called me and he noticed my voice sounded different and i told him i was smiling, because i was thinking of you.
He asked about you and i told him,
i told him you were a lesson i needed to be taught, you were adventurous, spontaneous, and i loved you.
I told him you were like that one song that you never get tired of no matter how many times you listen to it, i told him you were that great.
In the end he noticed my voice was different again and i told him it was because i wasn’t smiling anymore.
I’m sorry i tried to make a home out of you;
when you are so much more than a place to hide.

#love #heartbreak #poem #poetry #sad #depression #home #lost #thoughts #spilled