A friend asked me
how to be a writer.
I wanted to say,
lock yourself in a room,
scream until you have
a poem and no voice.
Open your veins and bleed
until you know that your bones
are pure words and sorrow.
Act as if you slit your own throat
and all you can bleed
are your own regrets
and all of the darkness
you boxed up for inspiration.
Write your mom a letter,
tell her you're leaving
and you won't be back for awhile
Because being a writer is traveling
through all seven layers of Hell
and denying anything is wrong.
Forget loving yourself
when all you have is a pen and paper
fused to your wrist
and Jesus is tapping at your skull
saying turn back now.
Warn the neighbors that if they smell burning
It's just your soul
clawing at the front door trying to get in.
Learn how to be alone.
Learn how to lose everything you have
in order to feel release,
learn how to only feel deceased
from now on.
A friend asked me
how to be a writer.
All I said was
don't

Artists are often
broken people
using the fragments of themselves
to create something new
and although
being healed
feels so complete
sometimes i want to be broken again
sometimes i want open wounds
so i can use the blood
to paint sunsets
so i can use the torn off pieces of skin as a canvas
so i can carve
masterpieces with the jagged bones left behind
but I can't bring myself to break my own heart in the name of Art

Sing to me.
Calm the ferocious
                                   t r e m b l i n g
of my hands.
Rid me of the anxieties
begging access to my consciousness.

Sing to me.
Lay to rest these thoughts that swear
I will
          never
                     be
                           enough
                                         for you.
Hold me as the Earth
threatens to c
                        r
                          u
         ­                    m
                          b
                        l
         ­            e
beneath my feet.

Sing to me.
Ignite the fire laying dormant in my soul
and I will keep you warm.
Soothe these aching bones that cry for you
each time you
                l e a v e.

Sing to me.
Lull my heavy heart to sleep
on the nights that I cannot do it myself.
Love me
                as I love you.
And feel the sun from both sides.