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 Jun 2014 Jay12
nichole r
For You
 Jun 2014 Jay12
nichole r
Even through the wars,
When society kicked my feet out from under me,
Even when my knees were scraped and bloodied,
When hot fire tears burned my chapped lips,
Even when I snapped like a worn rubber band,
Whipping your skin and making you yelp,
Even when my words were dipped in poison with barb wired tips,
You were there.

You,
With your white silk feathers,
And permanent glow,
And undying flames in the hushed snow.
You,
Holding out your hands,
Palms facing the sky,
Pulling me off the dusty floor, covered with glass shards.

The words are too hard
To leave my soft lips,
So I write a quiet message
That should be screamed from rooftops:

Thank you.
I wrote this for my parents, who never give up on me.
 Jun 2014 Jay12
nichole r
my world
 Jun 2014 Jay12
nichole r
My whole world is crumbling
like a cookie
dipped in milk
pieces left drowning
because who cares
about just one cookie?

My whole world is burning
like white, crisp paper
that was lit
on fire
by a neon green lighter
the smell of smoke fills the air
ashes litter the floor
because who cares
about just one piece of paper?

My whole world is collapsing
like a happy yellow house
after a sad grey storm
chipped paint
fallen beams
wooden splinters
broken dreams
because who cares
about just one house?

My whole world is nothing
a beige wall
a blank canvas
a dropped call
a dead battery
a fizzled out light bulb
a misheard whispered word
because who cares
about just one girl?
I've watched the world
Entangle
Everything I love
Into a changing embrace.
And I only hope that
One day,
It
S t o p s
Dear Drearily Burdened Soul,
I want you to know
That every time you cry,
Each tear has the power
To pierce
Through every fiber of my being.
And I know it's hard.
I know it takes every ounce of you
to muster up that smile.
But every time you do,
Let me tell you
Those broken fibers
Mend
Like friendship bracelets
Intertwined.
And I am whole again.
For a poet,

I'm really struggling

With the right words to say

To you.
There are over a hundred ways
To capture a moment,
To freeze time for a split second,
To remember.
Others paint pictures,
Sketch memories.
Art is a good tool for reliving.
You can hear laughter through paint strokes.
You can cringe at the anger pencil marks can so vividly create.
And even subtle color choice
Can send waves,
Tsunamis,
Hurricanes,
That will wash
every last trace you have of today
And push
you back so deep into yesterday.
Art is an illusion.
But my sister liked to take photographs.
She was able to grasp with two hands
That maybe cameras
aren't too different from paint brushes.
Capture
Moments.
Capture
Memories.
But while art sheds off illusion,
There was something
Terrifying
Hair-raising
Heart-pumping
about the wholeness
of reality
photographs blew.
My sister captured images of me.
And even if you could see me
Laughing,
Snorting,
Wallowing in every form of happiness,
My sister could never really capture
me.
Something always seemed to
Go beyond the frame.
Photographs showed the world
The way I like to twirl in summer dresses
Or the way my hair looked like tumbleweed whenever it decided to imitate the wind
Or how I was always more comfortable smiling
With teeth.
If you stare hard enough,
You'd see that, yes,
I am an ugly laugher,
And the
Awkwardness
of my buck teeth flying everywhere
would distract you
From what I was laughing at.
Photographs are not the bigger picture.
Photographs can't show you
how I love indie music
Or how not-so-great I am at playing the ukulele
Or how I always save homework for later.

Seeing is believing, they say.
But don't ever
Not even for a second
Accept me
Wholeheartedly
With arms wide open
For who you see in the photograph.
I imagined this as a Spoken Word piece. I have no idea when I can recite it, or if I will ever, but this poem was begging to be written. This poem is about me, no strings attached.  :)
I promise You
I'm going to
Live
By who You are today,
Paint
With the colors of Your promises,
Jump rope
To the music of purpose in my heartbeat,
And weigh
The value of Your steadfast love.

Steady

Is the last thing I want to be
For You.
I can carry my paint,
My jumprope,
And my scale to
Every
Wretched
Corner
Of this world
Just to prove
To every living soul
That You're more than just
A hero in a storybook.
I am a tree
That is still learning how to
Keep it's roots
Under moist soil
And away from little tripping feet.
I'm used to
Yawning
In the morning
Stretching
My branches
Until they have
Dropped the apple
Slightly too far from the tree.
And though I don't have
Much air
In my hair,
The leaves still fall.
Trust me when I say
It isn't worth it being this
Tall.
Sometimes I would long to pay
To not see everything.
The view from up here
Is ironically
Frightening.

Climb these heights
And I can't promise you no
Twigs in your hair
Or scratches on your arms.
This bark is rough
And these leaves,
Stubborn.
But the next time you
Stumble upon these roots,
Remember that I am the tree
That isn't all it looks.
Little girl,
Love is not a race track
That will leave you
Running
Around in circles.
There is no finish line.
Rather
Love is the spooky road
Less traveled
With thorny bushes
That ***** the very surface
Of a well-cared for
Heart.
Love is
Not what you expect it to be.
But walk step by step
Down the cracked up land
Of that torn up road
And at the very end,
You'll find
Promise,
Gleaming under bright sunlight.
Little girl,
Such fragile fingers
Cannot grasp on to light
No matter with skin-tight grip.
You're going to want to touch
And you're going to want to grab
But little girl,
Love isn't about touch
Or skin intertwined
But about compassion
And sacrifice
And words meant
That crawl around your heart
Like vines and
Vines need that promise of sunlight
To grow.
And grow
And grow some more.
You see, little girl
Growing takes time
And if you'd only steady the
Rushing
Pitter patter of your
Ecstatic heartbeat
Then maybe you'd stop ruining love
With impatience
With desperation.

For now,

You were left with something
I'm sure will make your heart content.
Stop looking around, little girl
Love is not a scavenger hunt
Love isn't something you can find
But
Love has found you.
Go ahead,
Fall in love.
But little girl,
Let me show you that
Love is rain during drought,
Love is light when all has darkened,
And while you're falling in love,
Love is the manna from heaven

That has already fallen

In the form of a Cross.
This poem just flowed. A little messier than usual but it flowed, and it needed to be written.
Love is He who is the greatest sacrifice of all time.
For love month, I didn't want to forget what Jesus did all because He loves us.
When life gives you lemons,
Breathe
Because there is only so much you can get out of lemonade.
Take your time measuring
The sugar
To balance out
The sour taste that
Lingers
Until after.
And if you make a mistake,
If it seams the sour still screams,
Remember that it
Exists
For you to
Anticipate
Every next sweet sip.
There will be unwanted pulp.
Don't drain it out.
And there will be spills,
So many spills
Until all sweet
And all sour have run out.
But wait.
Because life always has more lemons
To throw right your way.
An old poem I like to revisit to remind me how my life sort of works. Written as one humongous chunk of a metaphor, as usual.
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