What if I were there?
       I'd sit in the dark and hope you left. I won't tell you that you make
        me nervous.
And then what? ;)
      Please don't think I care about you.
Send me a pic.
      I know you don't care about me either.
Oh yeah baby
       Is this what we have come to call intimacy?
U know what I'd do 2 u?
      Emotionless exchanges, just for a moment of pleasure and a lifetime
        of shame.
What r u wearing?
      *I don't want this. I wanted love. This isn't love.

The heat seeping into my body through my hands
The steam sticking to my face like glue
The smell of peppermint surrounds me

I close my eyes and listen to the thunderclap
I listen to the rain hit my window

I fall apart
I shatter
Into a million little pieces

I feel the tea splash onto my hand as I shake
It burns but I enjoy the pain
It reflects the pain in my heart

Footsteps
I throw up my walls
Wipe away the tears
Clean up the tea

I'm fine.

As I walk to meet you, the flashbacks set in...
          Of running to greet you out in the rain,
          Of two am phone calls that erased the pain...
          I remember whispering I love you.

With your strong hold, embrace me; keep me close.
          *I recall the first time I felt safe with you...

putting away my silent mask,
pulling away my oxygen tank,
my heart beat won't slow down,
my pulse stopped when I saw….

it's alright, you're out of my sight anyway,
I'm alright, sitting in a plane to Neverland,
it's alright, yes it's alright

cause she got those trusting lips,
and she got those thrusting hips,
I'm left out with a flat empty feeling,
but it's alright, yes it's alright

you know you scored so **** well,
yet I'm struggling with a basic plan,
but it's alright, cause you're just an imitation
of a mind game, that I tried so hard to re-create

so it's alright.

Fingers slide down your throat
It's hard to forget, as you choke
Every bite you took today
Stupid girl, disgusting shape

Watch it come back one by one
Tasting it twice is half the fun
See the colors mix and swirl
Till your marker appears in the bowl

Wash your face, wipe your mouth
Now that you're sure it's all out
Look your reflection in the eye
Smile, like you don't want it to die