so i'm sitting here
smoking of course
&i;'m curling up, holding my knees
&all; i can think
is holding back my legs
so you can **** me deeper

he growls
low & deep
in my ear
sweaty face tangled in my sweaty hair
"this is intimate"
a rumble with a giant hand squeezing my throat
"this you can not do with just anyone...'
& since i can barely breathe
i just look at him
a look that can only mean
yesbabypleasemore
i am
yours
to
hurt.

tonight
is getting closer
i can almost taste you
in the air
every time...
i discover
you
a little bit more...
you ******* scare me
& light me on fire
[all the best ones do]
...those words fall from me
like an easy, familiar panic
like my body has been waiting for yours
for seven hundred ******* years
instead of just
seven days.

when i see your name pop up on my phone
earth. stops.
i saw it today
from a ******* mile away
& if i'm being honest with you,
because i know you like it -
the thought
of you
thinking of me
reaching out to touch me
makes me *******
drip
with a heavy
need
for
you

i think i feel every single tiny
earthquake
in my big bed
alone
[which i love]
because inside
i am always
quaking.

when i wake up in the morning
and slowly
little bits of life start to
come back to me

you're one of the first things i think of
there you are
as soon as i wake up

it makes my silly little heart
flutter.

sometimes you talk such ***** **** that even a seasoned pro in ***** talk
(such as myself)
is left with nothing more than a giggle
a sharp intake of breath
and a swimming head like I just drank a bottle of champagne
sometimes your words
make me rage with need and hunger
even more than your body does
sometimes I lean against my kitchen counter
that you ****** me against
when we forgot to make it to my big soft bed
and listen to you tell me
how you want to hurt me
come closer baby
bite me until you really taste me
leave my lips swollen and red
leave my hips bruised and aching
I want to see little constellations in my flesh
from
you