Building walls
Impenetrable
To everyone
Except you

I allow you in
Just so you
Can tear me apart
From the inside out

I like it when you're tired
And when your thoughts and words go
Go go go
And never stop.
They're unfiltered
So I see the true you
All your crazy thoughts
Your weird plans
               We should invent an artificial sun
                               that runs on solar power!
And we act foolish
Completely immature and playful
And I get to see your crinkly-eyed smile
And hear your hushed giggles
Whenever you laugh at the silliest things
And it's truly beautiful

Have your ever stood on the edge
And wondered?
What does the Black feel like?
Is it that soft brush against your skin?
Which raises the hackles?
Or would it cling like tar
Hot and sticky
Seeping into your pores and
Down to your very soul
Solidly encasing it in stone.
What does it taste like?
Does it brush against your lips
A whisper, a kiss?
Or does it flow down your throat
Choking, clogging, no air.
And what smell would it have?
Would it be a gentle reminder
Of a distant memory, buried deep
Or would it slam into your senses
Like a wind carrying the scent
Of Long Forgotten memories
That wound the heart.
If I took that step, from the edge
Would the Black softly receive me
Or burn forever, relentlessly?
Would it gently beckon me or
Would it reach out its long bony fingers and
Seize me
With no choice?
Have you ever wondered?

I sat at a table with Death.
I ate from his plate while he
Pinched from my snus.
We were drinking, and not unamused.
He was quite a good listener; took in
Every word.
He laughed at my jokes, and my
Stories he heard
With a keeness about him,
Charisma and charm,
So far from a force of such terror
And harm?
Not once did he hint at my life or my
Soul.
He paid for my drinks and for
Every bowl of
Nachos they served as we sat
Through the night.
Laughing and sharing until
The first light.
The best of my times. As if on
My request.
Then Death sat his cup down, put
Thumb to his chest.
Belched and stood up, took his scythe
And said: "Boy,
You went as you wanted; with
Beverage and joy.
Now leave every worry, forget
Each regret.
Come home and lay down, you have
Earned right to rest.
No second of Life that you lived,
You'll forget.
I sat at a table with Death.

When I called for you
I didn't expect you to turn
You don't love me like I love you
I've come to learn
I knew it was over that day
when you came to me
Like a tyrant, just glaring at me
And every word you said after, oh so mean
Suddenly you don't want us to be
Suddenly ''this'' wasn't meant to be
But come on this is me!
My darling this is meee
The same you claimed to own your heart
The same you told we'd never grow apart
Am I hearing you right when you say
Your love for me has blown away?
Tell me, was it ever there?

You get up and so you're off
Not caring to turn back
I say yes, walk on
Forget that when your back was weak
I carried your burdens
Forget that when ''friends'' stuck knives in it
I tended the gashes
And yet today you're turning that back towards me
Today you're the one killing my heart
After I nursed your wounded one

Tears streaming down my face
I called for you
Silly me still needed you!
I should've known you wouldn't turn
Because since we were
Your love for me never was
Now this
I've come to learn

Breathe in-2-3, out-2-3
Your eyes snap open
Sweat beads your forehead
You feel the cold circle
Of a gun against your temple.

Breathe in-2-3, out-2-3
Your eyes squeeze close
Your finger tightens on the trigger
Will you be strong enough?
But then you stop.

Breathe in-2-3, out-2-3
Your eyes open in wonder
Your shoulders slump
The gun lays forgotton on the table
A warm hand covers yours.

Breathe in-2-3, out-2-3
Your eyes close slowly
Your lips touch
Warmth surrounds you
The world is comforting again.