"I wish you well."
                                                          ­                    



                                         ­                                     (but not too well without me)

This isn't a poem.  Seriously, where'd he go?

the first time, touched
us, otherwise strangers
delving within ourselves
our overt close encounters
past intimate imitations
of love’s labour lost and gained
we collide
again and again
crossing over, crossing under
energies focused at the hip
flowing through & into one another
endlessly
we release
feathers soaked
in each other’s essence

at day's length, arc of my spine or
hallucination i twist into desperation. divide.
falling into slow symphonies, movements, i
regain breath just a moment to gasp some regret. to think what happened or happens. willing, nothingness and me, we
touch lips and contract. an ocean if we could tear apart. some space, some time to time fulfilment could write arrears: the pain
was (is) all worth it.

yet, i'm still feeling worthless.

I think back to the sixties
taking charge of our new  life
two hippies lost in limbo
that's when I took you as my wife

we grew up very quickly
the time to play was done
we sold out and got established
now that we weren't two but one

I close my eyes just to focus
I close my eyes to make you clear
I close my eyes so I remember
I close my eyes to bring you near
I close my eyes and wer'e together
I close my eyes so I can see
I close my eyes because I miss you
I close my eyes , once more we're we

we hit the disco era running
more run away than run toward
on every street there was a prophet
selling the new word of the lord

the beatles quit and that was tragic
elvis died and that was worse
our music wasn't just evolving
our music was leaving in a hearse

I close my eyes just to focus
I close my eyes to make you clear
I close my eyes so I remember
I close my eyes to bring you near
I close my eyes and wer'e together
I close my eyes so I can see
I close my eyes because I miss you
I close my eyes , once more we're we

the eighties was about consumption
we took *******, like all the rest
you were judged by your possessions
to have the most made you the best

in the nineties things were different
our lives were both put deep on hold
the doctor called and said a tumor
I remember all I felt was cold


I close my eyes just to focus
I close my eyes to make you clear
I close my eyes so I remember
I close my eyes to bring you near
I close my eyes and wer'e together
I close my eyes so I can see
I close my eyes because I miss you
I close my eyes , once more we're we

decades no longer counted
time went by just day by day
stage four was the conclusion
I mean what else was there to say

I lost you late that summer
you passed away after a fight
you battled hard to keep on living
before you ventured to the light

I close my eyes just to focus
I close my eyes to make you clear
I close my eyes so I remember
I close my eyes to bring you near
I close my eyes and wer'e together
I close my eyes so I can see
I close my eyes because I miss you
I close my eyes , once more we're we

I have the pictures to remind me
but, you are clearer to me when
I close my eyes, let my mind wander
I go back now to way back then

I can't describe you to another
unless I see you in my mind
I close my eyes and I am happy
my life is better when i'm blind

I close my eyes just to focus
I close my eyes to make you clear
I close my eyes so I remember
I close my eyes to bring you near
I close my eyes and wer'e together
I close my eyes so I can see
I close my eyes because I miss you
I close my eyes , once more we're we

I remember leaving
I'll not forget the in between
There's nothing in the world
Can erase the things I've seen

But, today I got my papers
got a call upon my phone
My duty now is over
and I am coming home

I've missed a lot
since I've been gone
I've never seen my son
I've never held him in my arms
I missed seeing him turn one

coming home my time is over
coming home my time is through
coming home to be a father
and a husband dear, to you
coming home a tired soldier
coming home but, not the same
coming home to be a person
I'm not a rank and a last name


I missed his second birthday too
But, I won't miss any more
I wasn't there when he turned three years old
But, I'll be there when he turns four

Things have changed
Things will be new
I know this will be tough
I can only promise that I'll try
And hope that  it will be enough

I've thought about you every day
You're in my heart and soul
I'm coming home to you my love
And then together, we'll be whole

coming home my time is over
coming home my time is through
coming home to be a father
and a husband dear, to you
coming home a tired soldier
coming home but, not the same
coming home to be a person
I'm not a rank and a last name