If I "act my age"
I would only be
Acting.

I have a certain paranoia
That everyone hates me
I know it's completely irrational
But this anxiety won't stop plaguing me

I feel like a burden
For simply existing
I'm fidgety, anxious and restless
Bracelets on my wrist always twisting and untwisting

A squeamish feeling in my stomach
When I hear laughter
The whole day is now spent
Thinking about it long after

Logically I know not everyone hates me
I know the things I tell myself aren't true
But I take solace in the fact that
No one will ever hate me as much as I do

I remember your sleepy head
The bags under your eyes told stories
You looked so tired when we first met
In your sleep you carry all the worries
I've never seen eyes so sorrowful
I asked about your dreams and fears
You said "don't always try to pull,
darling my eyes have been sad for years"

When she catches his eye his heart traps her,
tearing her in two
creating a hurricane of lust ripping through her veins
Katrina's tides of raging emotion
Ike's crazed passion and urge
she longs for him
an ache in her chest weighing her soul down
crushing her lungs, compressing her conscience
forcing out its raspy whispers of lies
manipulating her to smoke his air
congesting her mind with an addiction
her body coughs with a deficiency of his presence
all she needs is a quick smile or the brush of his hand,
painting a new arousal in her eyes
even though he is blind to her existence
but she is binded to another
a rib, Adam and Eve
Lust is a snake, biting the hand that feeds it
poisoning her with deceitful eyes and white lies
all is fair in love and war
but can you pay the fine that follows
a marionette controlled by the strings of curiosity
playing tug of the war with the strings of the heart
favoring the side of confusion
she is lost
flashbacks of her lover rewind in her brain
as she risk deserting what she knows for another
what she knows starts to deteriorate
leaving a skeleton of a once happy heart
as she is thrown in the triangle of love