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Empire May 2020
Do you know how ******* alone I am
Do you know how little anyone cares
Do you know how badly I just wanna
Bleed
Empire May 2020
A glass of wine a day
Keeps the demons at bay


...until it doesn’t
Might give it a shot anyway
Empire Apr 2020
tw self harm



I can’t hold out much longer
Every night I get weaker
From this eternal fight

I just want to hold it...
My blade
But I know what I’ll do...
I can’t see it
Can’t touch it
Can’t clean it
Can’t play with it
Can’t feel it against my skin
Can’t press the tip in
No..... you know you can’t stop
This ***** is too steep
But... I’m... I’m so tired...
I just wanna fall
  Apr 2020 Empire
Vellichor
(Cutting Trigger Warning!)

She studied the blade
That she held in her hand
While she braced for the pain
She’d learned to withstand

It shined like the snow
On a cold winter’s day
And bit into her skin
In the same bitter way

It fell like the rain
Plummeting from the sky
It drenched her in pain
As it pummeled her thigh

She watched through dry eyes
She was too numb to weep
But her skin cried in blood
As the slick blade cut deep

But after each raindrop
Her blade rose like the sun
Desperate for warmth
She didn’t care what she’d done

And once it was over
Sunburns littered her skin
But for a breath she could feel
Despite the frostbite within
If you’ve struggled with cutting, you’re not alone. I’ve struggled for years and I know its pull. I know how much it must hurt for you to turn to the blade. I know that cutting can temporarily help. But in the longterm, cutting won’t fix the problem. So please put down your blade, and I’ll try to do the same.
Empire Apr 2020
I don’t know if I loved you
But I know for certain
I was in love with the idea
That someone could care so much about me
And perhaps... I got romanced by it
By the hope that I wasn’t whatever I am
You were an answer to my prayers
But in the end
The lesson I learned best from you
Is that I shouldn’t have let you in.
Why am I writing you poems again??
Empire Apr 2020
She smiled
And meant it

She laughed
And felt it

She cried
But still wanted life
Empire Apr 2020
I couldn’t help myself
I still miss you terribly
Your absence burns in my chest
I can feel myself collapsing
In the place inside you once occupied

Jawn... sweet Jawn...
What have I done...
I never deserved you
You were everything I wanted
Except mine

John... darling I’d do anything to have you back
To speak to you once again
I’d forgotten how much you meant to me
But tonight... yes, tonight I remember
I remember everything
I feel all the agony

I DIDNT DESERVE THIS
YOU WERE... you were everything to me
I know I shouldn’t have let that happen
But I did
And you broke my heart
I did something immoral tonight... I betrayed your trust, Jawn. And now I’m paying the price...
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