Once I had a friend
    and soulmate,
we were dreamin’
we could fly away
    with the wind;
    but knowing
wings are for angels,
we stood transfixed
  beneath the light
  a sky full of stars


hanging onto a dream      
we clutched so tightly,
      perched high
      on the edge
      of the world,
wondering how far
     and how high
the great wide open
     sky blue skies
           abide


believing the power
  of kept promises ―
you said you’d forever
   catch me if I fall ―
letting go of the fears,
 blindfolded hope
clinched so deeply,
    hanging onto
a wing and a prayer


I guess I wanted it
     far too much
     reaching out
  like a thirsty fool
grasping for a mirage ―
teetering on the brink
    unspoken love,
   a vast unknown
  threshold beyond
          wings


with eyes wide open
throwing caution afar ―
   in a leap of faith
I reached ― out of reach
   into the mystic wind ―
    believing in dreams,
      in destiny's tease:
       I’d learn to fly
         before I hit
        the ground


but now I’m perpetually
          free fallin’
  I see the empty space
   all around me pass
a fleeting lifetime lost ―
   still  you’re nowhere
       to be found ―
    and I remember
what’s been forgotten:

       how far down
  rock bottom befalls
  when your spinning
    round and round
      like dust eddies
        in a fog bank
      lost in the wind                             .

gusto kong lumapit sayo
ngunit, sa tuwing gagawin
ramdam ko ang 'yong paglayo
pagmamaka-awa'y dinggin

gusto kong hagkan ka muli
alam 'to ng mga bituin
bukambibig 'to sa gabi
binubulungan ang hangin

ngunit anong magagawa?
kung ayaw mo na saakin
isa lang akong mahina
gin'wa para 'kay mahalin

grab my cheek for contrast
to contort and contrive
at your will, to fit the
porcelain mask you made
for me. to mold into
what you want me to be.
you could stain me red and
I still would not be the
right shade. I can’t compare
to these conditions you
made. I will never be
the right version of me
that was assigned by you.

Hold me to the light
and even just right
I will still fall short

You drink sweet coffee early mornings and sweat
pearls down your nape on summer  nights; you
dream of want.

Zinnia’s sit in an amber vase on your kitchen table,
bacon fries in a cast iron skillet;
there is regret.  

I know you, even though
we have never
met.

Am I in love or is it just a fantasy?
My heart beats for her, finding time to skip here and there.
My soul aches to be near her.
Leaving and saying goodbye breaks my mind.
Is that love or some false emotion.
Is it love when she doesn't feel the same.

those three words you have repeated time after time again

those three words, the same, meant differently each time.



I love you.



I love you, don’t be mad.

I love you, please stay.

I love you, let’s ****.

I love you, it’s not personal.

I love you, but no.



don’t tell me that you love me,

how dare you take that weapon into my back

as I tried to walk away.

anchors cast around my ankles

that were striding towards liberation.

don’t tell me that you love me

as we walked down the streets of downtown

after a month of silence in which I thought I had lost you.

but the way that your eyes smiled

when I echoed those words back,

it was a trap I couldn’t help but to fall into.

don’t tell me that you love me

when silence was on your end

after I drove 78 miles to see you.

later I came to learn that you were

getting high with your buddy Anthony.

don’t tell me that you love me

when you’ll never love anything more

than that chemical you inject into your body.

don’t tell me that you love me

and then go **** the girl

that had your heart before me.

you brought her into the relationship

from the very start,

an unintended *******.

don’t tell me that you love me

and not hold me in the night,

turning your back, yet again

keeping me on the outside.

don’t tell me that you love me

just to drag me back in.

don’t tell me that you love me

when you made sure to destroy

every ounce of self respect I had.



don’t tell me that you love me.