.....I miss having your lips on mine
and your hips on mine.
     The echo of you
on me,
lives on in all my senses
     in memory

You brought a light into my life.
No, you brought a glow into my life.
Neon.
Stick, necklace, bracelet.
A glow under covers in a fort made of whispers, linen, love.
Except you weren't just the glow,
but also the fort.

You defended me from the bombardment I threw at myself.
I, a dedicated double agent,
and cursed to operate as such.

And like a fort,
while protecting that which was enclosed, you were the one who took the hits.
Feelings, confusion, uncertainties.
Missiles from my life that crashed into yours.

And eventually, broke everything down.
The agent's mission complete.
Starting with a fort,
Ending with just a wall left standing,
you on the other side.
Forts aren't built to be sieged from the inside out.
People aren't built to defend themselves from those they love.

They say that time heals all wounds and they also say that time wears away stone.
But what they sometimes forget is that with effort and pain,
Stone can be broken apart without waiting for the time...
...to...
...drag...
...by...
And then, instead of only useless sand,
there may still be some pieces of worth.

Is there strength left to break down the wall that's still between us?
The stone that's left in your heart?
To get to a place, where all that exists is rubble.
To be carefully sorted through,
finding the memories and remnants of times passed.
To be rebuilt into something stronger than before.

Reality, illusions, conscious perception.
Equality, happiness for all, utilitarianism, or self-focus.
Importance for everything, or the lack thereof.
Deliberate decisions, everyone shaping the future or
Superfluous turn-points, life guided by predetermination propagated.

Soulmates, eternal love, a so-called twin flame.
Life partners through all, flawless understanding, love, creation, companionship.

Progress on a local scale, exceeding bounds in technology.
Communication, resources, tools for survival.

Religion, evolution, externally guided creation.
Proof, support, faith, tradition.
Heaven, hades, oblivion.

Finite or forever.
Purpose or irrelevance.

Breathing, bathing, beds, blankets.
Singing to sleep.
Shirts, socks, smooth slippers.
Waking with warm whispers.

Hugs, hands, heartbeat-hearing.
Stress surrendered in the sight of soothing
smiles.
Listening to soft sounds of lyrical loving
laughs.

Curling up and cuddling in calming coils by candlelight.
Sensitive stroking, sweet snuggling.
Reveling, repeating, repeating.
Forever finding:

Comfort in cozy coupled closeness.

As a child I wondered why people would get drunk,
turn to drugs,
harm themselves.
But now I see, if someone told one:
"This will make the pain go away."
It would be difficult to turn oneself away.

Interesting how we think, feel, experience.
No one is the same, and we feel no one can fully understand, ourselves, as they are not the same;
but that is in itself what makes us all the same.