Its been a long time since
I had anything important to say.
Still don’t.
The focus that writing requires
is distant,
fog-like and out of reach.
I feel it misty on my skin sometimes.
I turn my hand around and its spirit
touches me softly, tenderly.
I feel it held up in silence.  
It is brief and then its gone,
or I go, or both,
and then the sun burns bright
and the clock runs fast
forward through the day
like an hourglass where
the ringing in my ears
is the roaring of the sand
through the gap,
and though it is contained,
it brings down with it everything
my mind cannot hold onto….
  
There is no focus.
Mainly guilt,
but I catch a glimpse  
once in a while in the mist,

and when the mist is on my skin
there is no roaring through the gap

rather drifting, slow,
methodical as intended…..

Just not very often

They hear the thick ripples pouring gently over the rocks.
A muddy path silently walks into the heart of the forest.
Just him and her,
the wild and the delicate,
and the voices of the night hiding unseen among the branches.
The sun is going to set.
This evening too, it will settle on the sea
Like a wise old man, walking back home
with crinkled eyes that have seen so much.

The wet mud is their bed.
He held her palm against the cold ground,
his fingers into the wetness.
Heartbeats
Her eyes fluttered open for a moment
She saw a quiet amber sun sailing on the infinite sea.
The water will devour all the daylight she thought.
How much more could she be lost?

Tiny silver stars peep out
The sky is a shade of naked blue
The sound of the water grew nearer,
and she held him so tight.

And when he'd get her eyes wet,
he'd just hug her closer to his chest
But he never stopped, because
everything is suddenly more beautiful,
and they always kept wanting more.

-

Just beyond the setting sun
Of heavens born delight
A moon so sweetly in its form
Does send its magic light

Yet there beyond its boundaries
Another point does shine
As if it watches over this
Our moment caught in time

Towards the northern corner
As it hovers in its play
Of mysteries in timeless flow
Brings forth its grand display

We fantasize its meaning
Many thoughts about begin
In dreams of lasting promises
To bring us back again

Though in its stately wonder
We find it is to show
Joining hearts together
Within its wondrous glow

For every star that follows us
And every moon we see
Forever in the heavens soft
Is there for you and me

As if we only wander
Through phases found in time
With every second precious
Since my love calls you mine

I pray that many evenings
Till the time our world does end
Within my arms I’ll hold you tight
My love to you I send

So look this night my darling
To the full moon bright above
And know this other point of light
Is my undying love

There once was a girl
Whose laugh
Indelible
Brightens up
The whole room

There once was a girl
Always seemingly
Detached
Larger than life
They say

There once was girl
Even on the days
She does not
Smile
Beautiful, they say

There once was a girl
Who goes for weeks
Sometimes
Without speaking
Tired, she says

There once was a girl
In class staring out
The window
I don’t know her
I don’t know her

It’s said
Glittering things just in the distance do not always mean that gold is just within reach
for fools gold is so much nearer to the truth

And in a similar vein
Smiles and laughter do not always denote happiness
because those in the most pain know well enough how to hide it
and that you would probably prefer it that way

And just like mining,
One has to dig past the surface
To see whats hidden within
So break out your pickaxe
and plop on your safety gear
and if you care as much as you like to say you do
Get ready to work
and dig
and get *****

Who knows what you’ll find
Diamonds or coal
Riches or nothing at all
Gold or pyrite
The truth or another lie
For even past surface level
Things can remain hidden in the dark

Just when you think you’ve reached the treasure
You’ve searched for so desperately
Your foot might fall upon something you didn’t even see
A pitfall perhaps
and down you go
Further from your goals than ever before

If there’s one thing i’ve learned in my life
It’s how to set traps and barricades
So unwary spelunkers never touch my heart
and only those who really care will get close
Close enough to free my heart from the barbed wire prison I created

My gold and treasure
My friendship
Is only for those who can earn my trust
Because while my body isn’t a temple
My soul is sacred land
Never to be desecrated by uncaring hands
And I will never let the hymns and lullabies I whisper myself to sleep with
To encourage myself
To let myself dream for a bright future
Be taken

I will never see them ruined or changed to fit the agenda of the uncaring deity you see yourself as
Instead I’ll bury them in the sacred land of my heart
Only to be found by those deserving
I will never allow myself to lose the love I have to give
For friends and family
For even after I dissipate into the end
Into the resounding, echoing, heartbreaking “Nevermore!”
My whispered lullabies will remain for those who earned the right to listen
And so for now I'll leave my treasure locked and buried
My love safe within my heart, my temple
Until you can prove to me you deserve it