I** thank you for moving out of my life.

Nowhere else is my own happiness,
Or rather it is my self-satisfaction,
Winning the 7 Minutes of pleasure.

Greatness I see in me after she departed,
Red-faced she seemed purple with shame,
Equipped with a pump I see myself,
A pump of self-satisfaction and relief,
Tasked I am with my own happiness,
Looks interesting this lonely pursuit,
Yet I know that I can be easily happy.

Advancing alone on the road of love,
Demands of my own body I listen to,
Minding not that I require a female,
If I wanted to make strong kids, 'coz
Ravishing my body has always been,
Even before I ever requested you to stay.

Maybe you can get a better husband,
Yet I am going to be really very satisfied.

This is the life I have always been loving,
Hindsight is never going to be pleasing,
I am so aware of this fact I have known,
Checked fully is that one best gift to self,
Kingly is this feeling of self-satisfaction.

Enjoy information I do in my life alone,
Just like before you or the others came,
And I now realise that before all I came,
Chiseled is my muscly pump after pumping,
Up & down, round & round, up & down,
Laid before I did in Agra like a clown,
Awesome is the feeling self-satisfied,
Tremendous is my relief each time,
Ever happier I have been pumping.

Why do I still try?

This love is like halaal
Everyday a bit of me dies
Whilst it keeps stabbing me
Bit by bit.

Now I feel like
A lone cloud
Drifting away into my paradise
Of filth and dark air.

I am standing on a cliff
And on either sides
I know I will be woebegone.

What do I do?

**How do I tell you I love you?

Where do I find peace of mind

In the crevices of deep thoughts

Or in pointless banter?

When someone pulls my love handles

Or in the last breath before I sleep?

When I recite stories to a rock

Or when I walk free

off the dependence on the greater powers?

When I relish old pictures

Or when I lose myself in the memories of music?

When do I really feel at peace?

All I taste is my own breath
Pacing faster than my thoughts

I wish I could describe what anxiety feels like.