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 Apr 2014 Dia
cigarette daydreams
It looks like no writer
can escape the clutches
of their true inspiration.
 Apr 2014 Dia
pluie d'été
please don't
press me
to your chest again
my cheek
get's a stain
that leaks into my heart
and makes me miss you
a little bit more
every time
 Apr 2014 Dia
Miss Dan
Lovely Ruins
 Apr 2014 Dia
Miss Dan
It was January when I wished to have an adventure
Like climbing a mountain; just being one with nature
But you seemed disinterested. You didn't make plans with me.
You simply said, "Don't worry. Someday. Maybe."

On Feb fourteenth, I made some chocolate parfait
Hoping we can enjoy the love-is-in-the-air day.
But you wrote me, "There are some things you have to let go."
And I thought to myself, yes some things, but not you. No.

On March, there was a pile of school stuff to work on.
Everyone was so busy to even sing me a birthday song.
As I entered the room, you just smiled and said "Hi."
And that left me thinking you forgot that today is my...sigh

End of sem, 'twas posted. Yes, we passed the exam!
With tears of joy, I gave thanks for a job well done.
I so wanted to celebrate that joyous moment with you.
But you weren't there. Worse, there was no one to talk to.

It sounds heart-breaking to know how cold you treated me.
But wait, there's more- I'm not yet done telling this story.
There were things that didn't turn out as I wanted it to be.
What happened next sums up how you ruined it perfectly.

You didn't plan that trip with me 'cause you wanted a surprise.
One day in January, you brought me to nature's paradise.
Hours of climbing up the mountains, alas we have arrived.
And that 'someday' you told me then, is a dead word given life.

I flipped that letter on valentines, and read what's written next.
"...except lollipops. Everybody loves it", that's the following text.
You said I should let go of the things that made me bitter.
And that you'd never leave me, come worse, or even better.

On my birthday, I managed to say "Hello" but nothing more.
Then I saw your doodle greeting posted on my backdoor.
"Happy birthday dear", it says. That made my day brighter.
Turns out you've worked overtime on that since two nights prior!

You went home that night when the exam results were posted.
I wasn't in the mood to talk. I'd rather sleep on my bed.
Then you placed on the table, this fruit you brought from the city.
So that's why you were missing! You bought a delish gift for me!

Looking back, I can't complain on how sad I felt initially
'Cause when I felt so down, you never failed to uplift me.
And if being with you means my every plan will not happen,
Then I'd bravely take that risk and live along these lovely ruins.
And yes, I'd love to be beautifully ruined by you.
 Apr 2014 Dia
Mike Hauser
Would it be considered suicide
If I failed to see the truth
Or listen to friends time and again
That the gun in my hand was you

Who was it that purchased the bullets
Who spun the magazine
Who left the fatal shot in the chamber
Who caused this horrific scene

As it goes it doesn't much matter
The shot has already been fired
The end couldn't have come quickly enough
The hole straight through the heart

So I ask...

Would it be considered suicide
If I failed to see the truth
Or listen to friends time and again
That the gun in my hand was you
Striking words that ignite
an inferno.
Flame that's never infinite.
Were love's burning strength ever enduring, there wouldn't be break ups.
 Apr 2014 Dia
Wednesday
I wonder if you’d want to know
I named all of my demons after you and
they haunt me in my sleep

when I was 14 I fell asleep in April and dreamed of bones and
I’m not sure I’ve really ever woken up since

when I lost 5 pounds I never saw a difference

when I lost 10 my mother said I was looking good

when I lost 20 she told me to stop and handed me food
and I became anemic

when I lost 25 I stopped drinking anything because
I felt water had calories

when I lost 30 my mother held me on her lap
and held my bones together for me

when I lost 35 I started fainting every morning and
the doctors could no longer easily find my blood pressure

when I lost 40 people started to stare and food made me cry

when I lost 45 it hurt to walk and to lay down
it hurt to eat
it hurt to breathe and
I started throwing up my empty stomach

the mind plays tricks on those that decide
nourishment is not needed

Eat.
 Apr 2014 Dia
Andrew Durst
I almost
forgot to
tell you
about
how the
stars
shine off
your smile
and the
setting sun
looks better
in your
pale blue
eyes.
and all
of the
woods and
desserts,
I'll set it all
on fire.
      And we'll
burn together
never questioning
how it could
have been.
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