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  Jul 2015 DawynSHunter
Meg B
Collection of characteristics
that the outside world
deems desirable:
empathy,
gentleness,
sensitivity,
the ability to love
deeply, madly.

Yet,
from where I stand,
the view is bleak,
for having a heart that
is big
means that it is
a hundred times more likely
to be punctured.

I wonder
how many times
my soul can
take these blows
before it withers
into
nothingness.

My body aches
of a perceived emptiness
that is
grossly
full of
an echoing,
resounding compilation
of disappointment,
anger,
and despair;
and though I am sad
in the free flowing of
my own bitter words,
I breathe in a jagged breath,
heave a large sigh,
and succumb to my
self-induced
anesthesia
as my big heart
is transplanted
with some smaller,
colder *****
that is not
riddled
with
pain
and
dismay.

I want to be
small,
simple,
average,
for there is nothing
to be desired
in anguish,
and I now
find myself
writhing in
envy of
those who possess
the gift
of
apathy.
DawynSHunter Jul 2015
You lying and promising,
sick of “I love you”apologies

You never knew
the pushing and the pulling that i went through
to tell you the truth
I ******* hate you,
and i know under all that family crap
you do too

And that's okay
the love you have for me goes half-way
Now i can finally leave you
i say Adeiu
  Jul 2015 DawynSHunter
sad baby
i hate you both
dad to me your nothing but a ghost
mom ever since i was 13 i've been crying myself to sleep
you have not once payed attention to me, never even heard me weep

all you've ever noticed are my ***** up
and i know at times i could be corrupt

over and over
reminded my about my failing grades,
which led me to begin bringing out my blade

when i told you (mom) i was depressed
you laughed at me, and said you don't even know anything about stress, how could you be depressed?

and dad what on earth happened to you
you always seem to go insane
never bothering to call
always leave me wondering where you are
you're always sick because of your daily "one too many drinks"
i used to get disappointed
but now i've learned to expect nothing less of you
DawynSHunter Jul 2015
Today
The tears have managed to slip out
Bringing about the red eyes,
choked out cries
of what life is really like
Inside these four walls

At every corner
i cave
Knowing if i stand up
i will get slammed down
down to where i curl up
dead, still wishing for a better life
inside these four walls

I live in fear for tomorrow
Afraid i might finally have the courage
to press down deep enough
to expose the anger that runs through my veins
everyday
inside these four walls

Mother and father is what they call themselves
nuturing us with love and care
protecting us from the evil that is out there
but is there a difference from the evil out there
and the evil that is stained
on these four walls

Forced to play by their rules
We follow them blindly
even with the ocassional abuse
"you're not white" excuse
marks of bruises
that show our traditional ways of life
inside these four walls.

Crying is not allowed
no sugarcoating when we're down
we live only for your purpose
of control and possession
choices made under your disgretion
indide these four walls
it's all i've ever known
there's no place like home.
DawynSHunter Jul 2015
If wishes could come true
I'd be free
no worries, no regrets
left behind me
If wishes could come true

There would be nothing holding me back
no blood ties, no memories
no more abuse
If wishes could come true

I would smile at every chance
no screaming, no shouting
no more tears for you
If wishes could come true

I would open my eyes for the world to see
no pain, no fear
no more hiding from you
If wishes could come true

I wouldn't need a birthday cake
no candles, no blowing
no more wishes
just waiting for my dreams to come true
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