Make
M
E
Your's
Dont
U
S
E
Me.

Tears bleed sorrow,
it's thorns etch upon
My sullen face.

This blows dude's, if your looking for a girl, good look with that because now most either just want a buck or a yeah. If your looking for real love, I guess your imagination is the best
Place to find it, not all women are money seekers, but duders, where are the poor cool down to earth chicks. The ones who know how to live a life as they live their poetry,
Dont know really anymore. Better off making a fake girl in my poetry calling her whoever I wanna name her, and have all the fun write's  for her I can give. Good or bad idea, dont know.

It makes me ******* sick.
Hearing you ask if I am happy,
Knowing very well that I can't be happy,
Knowing very well that when I needed you most, to just say, "there,there"
You disappeared.

I haven't been truly happy in four long years. I've grown up so much but it seems I've left only a trail of n'er shed tears.
It's a cold and bitter road, here
Looking into the past and seeing yourself,
Conquered by self defeating fear, to know I had so many chances and one left or one right, and more likely than not you'd still be near.

There is no forgiveness there's just rot. We call it moving forward, it's natural they say, but for me it's not. It's grim like the reaper and it keeps me up a lot flashes of flashes, of futures unwrought.

So you come to me now wondering how I've been. And these tortures of mind begin to circle in. I'm sly and smooth at first. But so very soon I'm pushing. Pressing. Reminding you of my desperate longing for a memory of you to end my phoney lonely self. You shut down. God you were always the best at shutting down, such an adorable abnoxious little tick.. **** I still love you. **** does it make me sick.

There is an unwriteable in my life,
An unspeakable in my mouth,
An undreamable in my sleep.
Such a hurt,
That I cannot even skirt
Around it, hint at what
The unpermitted is.
A blank space in my head
Once remembered,
Now consumed.
As a doe absorbs her kittens,
I unlearn myself,
Unwritten from existence,
And unspoken evermore.

This pounding in my head
And ringing in my ears,
Tightness in my chest
And tingling in my fingers.
This dizziness that consumes me
And fears that threaten my sanity
Rip at my heart
And make me feel like I'm going crazy.

This never ending sadness
And tears that threaten to drown me,
Irrational fears consume me
And poison my once good thoughts.
This emptiness and loneliness
And loss of energy I cannot get back
Tear my world apart
Until I no longer can go on.

Falling asleep,
But needing to write,
Too much oxygen,
Or too much right,
I owe it to her, to write right meow,
Heartbeat is realizing,
They aren't coming back that night,
Like a loyal dog it begins to calm,
Until they come back,
And feel their palm,
I don't think to stand nor sleep,
Just here wherever,
Trying to remember new memories to keep,
It's awkward, but unforced,
With delirious comfortability,
But sleep eventually conquers,
And my writing loosing eligibility,
Dizzy, but the smiling won't cease,
Waking up tomorrow, or tonight.
With an awkward peace

I wanna let you go, but if I do ill be empty. I'll go mad. Your my 24/7 but i'm your once in awhile.


a.m.

You say you understand but you do not
I see the sympathy across your face
I just wish you saw me for who I am
Saw me as more than a charity case
Stop trying to imagine what it's like
Maybe there is a God, maybe there's not
If there is, he's got a sense of humor
I mean, just look at my pitiful life
Accidental and wrong in every way
I wish he'd find better entertainment
No one understands, no one ever will
Maybe they'll hear and believe the rumors
Of why I killed myself that lonely night
They say it wasn't bullying or love
But it was just over life in itself
They say she warned her friends a million times
They just couldn't comprehend the signs
They say she doesn't blame all her friends
Just some can live life, others have to leave
Maybe in some other life, you'll see me happy

Please,
Don't be in love
With me,
I know I can't
Love you.
Yet,
She's in love
With someone else,
We're conflicted,
Misconstrued.
Our quadrangle
Leaves us dangling
On parallel love lines.