I heard it as distinct as I hear my heartbeat
in my ears. A slight, faint plaint, from the corner
of my closet.
Was it a purr? Or a breath from a lost friend
calling me to look. Marge, a phantasm, memory?
Touched my shoulder. I heard words say,
look in the little box in the corner.
I did, as I thought of looking back,
and saw two eyes peep up. Grey white furry head attached.
They seemed to say to me, I am sorry.
I heard mews then, I knew.
My Babay, a stray I took in when I  lost her, was nursing four of
earth's miracles.
I haven't cried as much since Jan 7th.
I fed her tuna milk.
and, bought me a big
cigar, alternating,
between memories,
and the newness of life.

O wind she is far though
in thy blow whisper to her
to find me on the horizon's glow
read heart's script on the first star!

O wind when thou pass by her
ask if she sings the old song
its notes make her eyes blur
aching for the lover missed for long!

O wind when thou play on her hair
and she feels the touch of my hand
strum the tune softly in her ear
I'm pining in a faraway land!

O wind when her cheeks thou kiss
wet them with thirsty lips' touch
speak to her my only dying wish
to let her know I loved her very much!

I lay in bed
My heart as heavy as lead
Breathe , in and out
Tomorrow will come, there is no doubt

Brokenness, soulfulness, woefulness

Today, the sun has risen
Such a contradiction
Darkness  surrounding
Leaving the story unwritten

Ferociousness, outspokeness, emotionless

Yesterday, looking for a do over
Constantly looking over ones shoulder
Trying to remember
Beauty is in the eye of the beholder

my eyes and saw black as white all grey
            clean as how I felt not how
much I tithed Sunday,
         rich as the hungry sharing their last bites
strong as the weakest among us, the police
                  as human like us.
Victims as examples of what not to be.
Love, as something rare, to share,
   with those I see as enemies more,
than those who know I care,
               grey as the horizon is,    before a beautiful
sun arising, money a commodity,
     humans as beings, truth as gold, love bold standing
above all, there on the altar, I married.

Alone,
in the breath of Mother, I pace
I wait.
I know of her coming;
it is inside me.
She is inside me.
Yet, I have never smelled her scent,
nor drank of her life.
I know of her like I know of the moon.
     I am pulled
into her path.
Years of flesh
could never wash away my hunger for her.
Even the sweetest cries of fallen prey
do not take
my mind from the moment
when we will finally meet.
It is my destiny.
My desire.

I lay here on the earth,
my body hidden.
My breathing shallow.
I can feel her near.
Years of waiting,
of feeling the slightest bit closer,
every moment has come to this.
I will be patient, still.

Faint sounds perk my ears,
drawing my attention to the distance.
My mind smells fear,
though I am nowhere near.
I am invisible.
The unseen.

Leaves rustle and my dark beauty emerges.
My heart slows,
for my instincts say NOW
But, I have waited so long,
I will relish this torture.

She is cautious and wary.
Eyes darting, knowing,
yet not seeing.
I am here, my love
Yet, silence is my steed.
I will be upon her before dawn.
Slowly, she creeps away.
Even slower, I follow.
She is never from my sight.
Never again
will her scent be an unknown memory.

Moment by moment
I feel her heartbeat stronger.
Am I getting closer?
No...I am further away.
I can hear her heart beat within my own.
Flutters within me
I have never known
tell me...tell me this is not my pulse.
It is hers, becoming mine.
As her blood will soon flow through me.
She shall strengthen me like no other.
She will complete me.

The forest grows thin
as we move towards light.
This is not my home.
Here, I do not feel right.
I feel like an intruder, a beast.
But, I cannot stop.
I am committed to this.
My life will continue
with her a part of me
or it will remain here and die.
So, I pursue.
       I hunt.
Closer I stalk,
narrowing the distance between my meal and I.
My hunger growls,
yet my throat does not.
The time nears that will join us into one.
Closer...              closer...            closer....
She stops and freezes.
She knows I am near.
Can she feel me as I do her?
Has her life been foreshadowed with my coming?
Does her body ache
or does it tremble in fear?
All that I am wishes to be nearer.

She moves...I take the moment to narrow the gap.
We are closer now than ever before.
I am the demon who shall devour this lamb.
I am the wolf,
I will consume her forever.

I smell her fear through my skin.
She calls to me...
to sink my teeth within
her voluptuous hide.
She freezes and turns my way.
How could she see me?
No, her gaze passes over me.
She just knows I am here.
As she turns away,
I spring from the ground.
I hear her cries as I fly through the air.

Finally, I am upon her!
Her cries muffled by my weight.
My teeth sinking into her neck.
Sweet, warm life
flowing down my throat
as I pin her harder to the ground.
She struggles violently.
Desperate for freedom
that she will never taste again.
She is mine!
Completely and irrevocably mine.
The more she struggles,
the deeper my bite sinks inside her.
Her passion flows hot into my throat.
Her body convulses as imminent death dawns.
Her heart synchs stronger with mine
as they pulse violently to Death's cadence.
Slowly, yielding, she gives herself to me.
Her body, her breath, her mind, her ***.
I drain them all and take her in.
I tear her skin, rip her flesh coming in.
I devour her life and her heart I win.

042704~8.2p

what will the night be
i have two beers left in one can
one bud rolled
one seed planted
two ways to approach this:
go to sleep,
or profoundly seek
answers. Close eyes ,
or reach deeper,
until
deeper is down and my two beers
empty the one can.
the bud no longer creeps in my skull.
so now,
I am slitted eyed weary of
becoming
of the normal.
punching
that clock.