how tragic!

the ones we want to love,
will never know the intense fire burning inside us,
for them,

and the ones we get to love,
are burning for someone else.

can’t tell at all if these thoughts are even mine, smoothing my hair out
on the lawn while the sun kisses our skin and we lay around
Spring is getting swept away and the asphalt is as hot as you
heat circumventing every shade of skinny leaved trees
and our truant is every bit of rebellion i need to escape myself
these neon signs are open and i still want steal time with you
just like the weather did and be full to the brim of light
want to dream again if this day is one, and daydream all the stinging away

we sprouted wings
reckless in our adolescent love
we flew into the sun
attracted by its warmth
we reached for affection and found one another
in times of uncertainty and change
we grasped onto the slim love we had
and forced it to sprout
to grow into a flower
that wilted after several months
we became heedless
of the warnings given to us
we moved too fast
and did flips through the air
because everything was alright
until we burnt and fell
a flaming meteor,
finally returning back to earth
"us" died a spectacular death
tragic and full of lessons

but
we have a second chance
we have learned our lesson
we have grown up and matured
and now
we can use our wings
to soar peacefully together
without touching the sun
we can fly at our own pace
we can embrace without caring
about the consequences
we are the legends that made it
icarus watches us from above,
and calls us angels.

We're almost touching.
we were walking side by side,
you're talking about cabs in your hometown.
I can feel the gravity of your hand, calling my fingers
whispering "it's alright."

We're touching but not quite.
you held my shoulder to protect me from the passing cars.
and for the first time in a long while, I felt so fragile.
In this world where I find it hard even to breathe,
you believed me.

I almost said it.
All I need is one ounce of strength to tell you every single thing that I have ever felt about you.

I want to find home in your collarbones.
Would you be kind enough to let a stranger in?
I want to seep in your being because I'm cold.
The world is harsh and my cracks are aching.

Almost.

It's late April
The weather is more like fall though
Melting snow and dry foliage
Autumn reminds me of you

We celebrated Halloween together
Pumpkin farms and feeding goats
Themed parties that didn't go right
Streaming tears in your basement
And I knew exactly how to help you

Video games on cold nights in our onesies
You singing to me
Echoing across the practice room walls
Our song
It meant so much to you and I felt it too

Something changed when I fell in love
With someone else
I still loved you too though
You thought I had commitment issues
Maybe I do
Maybe I don't
I don't want to go there now

I still remember the good times we had
It hurts to think about them now
But whenever I'm in town
I hold my breathe because I'm scared to see you
I'm scared to look closer at our relationship
I panic when it smells like October
Because it reminds me of you
Of us
And I'm too scared to think about how that makes me feel

For the heartless
You were once head over heels
And maybe they loved you too
But they clipped your wings
And charred your heart
So now you reside
In the dark parts of a crowded room
With eyes glazed over
a movie replaying in your mind
Of a memory
you wish you could forget
But if you wait
You will find someone
With a movie
The frost behind your eyes will thaw
And new growth will emerge
From the volcanic ash that is your heart
As they restore you halo
This is a message
A warning
A public safety announcement
For the heartless

persistent portraits fill the air
sky-blue hearts and broken chairs
with deeper meanings than i can fathom
i bounce off the ceiling, upside down in the gallery
whimsically indifferent to the stars
my hands are shaky and my mind is blank
but all i can remember is
the checkered sheets upon your bed
the grooves on your knuckles and the etches on your cheeks
the firmness of your muscles and the warmth i feel with you
i escape because i cannot fathom where you have gone
take me with you, my lover
im trapped inside a never-ending maze
but you have flown to the moon and above
broken hearts and sky-blue chairs.

I have been over thinking
I have been over-analyzing
about if a glance is just a glance
or if it is a ten-minute stare
that I happened to notice
the last awkward seconds of
or just you staring off into space
nowhere in particle
on one in particle
was it a strategic move
made by the boy across the classroom
or was it an instance
that you looked in my general direction
and made unwanted eye contact
does that smile mean anything
was it you being polite
after this weird encounter
or was it a friendly invitation
to talk to you
someone who has been unattainable
for so long
you have not smiled at me
in three years
so what does this smile mean
I have been over thinking
I have been over-analyzing
about the moments
that we share and shared
out past and present
though there was not much of either
they replay in my mind
and the ability to shut off my brain disappears
what can I say you make me over think
you make me over-analyze
you make my mind go haywire