My heart,
Is a jigsaw puzzle composed of
Pieces of souvenirs from wherever
Life has taken me

Sunny mounts of happiness,
Dark troughs of gloom,
Blind alleys of secret memories

Punched out remains
Of the parts that I gifted to
Those special few

Uneven buds added on
To the surface, because some gave me
Pieces of their hearts too

Marks of where it was trodden on,
Scars that show its
Brave, healed face

With pins of guilt and remorse
Studding it in memory of how
It also became the cause of others' pain

That's my heart. Not so pretty,
Not perfect, not pure,
Yet it sits in my chest, beating away
Patiently, as if entirely sure
That any moment, its wait will end
Of someone who'll admiringly
Imbibe all of its stories,
Ease away all the tense knots,
View in awe all its glories

And let its inadequacies depart,
Completing them with closeness-
Smoothening their unevenness-
By merging with them,
Heart to heart

I

not
every day
of the week
has a name.
several do without;
and last
forever.

as some
are

Mondays.

II

Let me be clear.
You have no soul.
You are
one.

III

I am thinking of a number.
Divide it by two
and you will know
what i think
of something
else...

“If I say I wouldn't be hostile,
could you say you would do the same?
If we're all made just a little bit broken,
tell me who is to blame?”

We’ve all got battle scars,
wounds from fights we’ve already lost.
You made me promise not to get this bad,
but I can’t seem to control myself around you anymore.

The voices are building up,
I promised,
and I’m still not taking back my word,
but you’ve turned your back.
And you left me in the dark.

I thought I loved you,
but I realized this whole time I was wrong.
I break at the mere mention of your name,
driving my entire life downhill.

I’m always going to be,
a broken imperfect mess.
I tried to change for you,
but there’s nothing else to change.

I’m a damaged marionette,
lying in your disapproving hands.
But this won’t be my defeat.
With my bones exposed,
I stand up and fight.

Fighting for my life back,
for all I want to be.
I might have lost the battle,
but I’m going to win the war.

Lets see how much you need me.

I’m done playing your endless games,
find a different pawn,
I’m through.

“If I say I wouldn't be hostile,
could you say you would do the same?
If we're all made just a little bit broken,
tell me who is to blame?”

To sum it all up,
I don't think anyone
has been able to
understand me as well as you did -
understand me enough to know
I needed help understanding myself.
So when you left,
you left me in this trance
where I didn't know whether
to walk back or run forward.
Instead, I lit myself on fire
thinking it would be easier
to learn from scratch
than to fix broken glass.
But either way,
I came up confused with ****** hands.

gd

"Give your heart a break from knowing his favorite color
Give your heart a break from dreaming about his lips and his eyes, remember the ones you spent countless nights getting lost in?
Give your heart a break from conversating with his shadow and start getting to know your own skin
Give your heart a break from drowning his phone in one sided apologies and hopeless "i love you's" you've done your best i guess and my darling I can't tell you why he is so cold hearted but I can tell you that there is a fire burning inside of you and your lungs are evacuated your burning building and it'll come out the right way in the end i promise and yes he's a **** but you hopelessly fall at his feet and can't help how the love you have found is killing you faster than a gunshot and quicker than an overdose, my dear I'm so ******* sorry he doesn't understand how much you love him and I'm sorry your veins have become untwined with his but you wanted to fall in love the contract clearly stated the consequences of loving this dangerous boy things are bad now but I know he'll come around i know it, after all once you fall in love the first time, you never really fall out of it but for now just do yourself a favor and give your heart break." (v.m)

I want to throw away these woes
these words of yours and mine.

You give them weight,
they'll weigh us down
like water in my lungs.

Don't drown me with what I don't believe.
I can't believe in it
I'll be pulled down too.

Kick up!
Kick up to the surface!
Toss away the chains,
we're free.

Just you and me,
no weights
no woes
not a single no.

Nods in our direction,
now is the time to go.
And breath with me.

Our words go hand in hand,
eclipses in between our lungs.
The songs go in and 'round to the same tune sung in day and night.
But I won't let us drown.

3 am and I'm wide awake
Tossing and turning in a bed too big
To soothe my lonely soul.
And as my mind wanders to you
And your arms around me
I begin to wonder if it's really you
I miss....
Or just being held.

I have hungered to be filled,
satiated down to the very fiber of
my being.

Am I crazy to crave food with such
carnal intensity?  Expecting chocolate
sugary goodness to satisfy the soul's
hunger underneath my physical craving.

But not everything has to be about God,
does it?  Sometimes, I just want to savor
the rich decadence of dark chocolate mingled
the burning fire of a chili pepper.

Am I coveting?  Am I being sinful to be too
material and sensual?  ******* it!  I bet
God loves taking a slow bite of chocolate.

I keep dividing the world into
material and spiritual.  
Maybe that's why I'm so hungry?

My fingers cannot scale a melody
or take a rule across lands, to the sea
and back again. My fingers have never
pressed these strings into sounds worthwhile,
nor have they ever held a person's hand
and not felt utterly incapable of human touch.
These fingers know only strength in binding;
in fidget and rhyme, as I try to structure confusion
into something marketable. If nothing else though,
these fingers can roll a mean joint, and hold a
beer bottle so precisely to these lips.