Am I the only one that has their demons feasting upon their souls?
They say it is easy to tie a noose around your mind,
To overcome the urges and temptations of ending your life with a suicide
They don't know the true pain and torment that is going on in my head
An epic battle that leaves me with restless nights in bed
"End your life already" they say, as they prey on me during my weakest hours
Sometimes I give into the voices, carrying the sharp blade to my wrist
Crying as I struggle to mutter three powerful words that keeps me going
Choking on my sobs, my lungs deflate with a desire to say that God loves me
I try to convince myself that God is trying to test my faith
And to just wait, wait and wait
Then my Demons will eventually go AWAY.....



~Imperfect Desire **

aching, tired, weary.

Pain?

Me?

Why ever me? My pain shrinks.

Never, oh never would that happen.

At least that's what everyone else thinks.

I cover my feelings with a mask of happiness.

Trying to hide,

Trying to shield myself from deadliness

Of my heart.

I sit here thinking, wondering, I feel,

I feel dumbstruck.

Like Alice, curious, wondering,

Wondering what's going on in this wonderland of emotions.

I feel stuck.

I don't even know who I am,

Myself!

But apparently everyone else does.

At least that's what everyone else thinks.

Me.

Me.

Me, myself, and I.

Am I the one or am I three?

No one will ever know.

Well, maybe,

Just maybe,

Everyone else will.

Remember I'm happy!

Happy.

Happy?

Am I really?

At least that's what everyone else thinks.

we are an ignorant generation, loosely saying words when we don't know what they mean. So we speak, while stuck in between truths and lies. And we will continue to sleep beneath polluted skies.

I watch as you fall
Fall to your knees

You watch me as I rise
Rise to my feet

I watch you fall to the floor
Fall upon your side

You watch me rise towards the sky
Rise straight up

I watch you fall into the earth
Fall and die

You watch me rise up high
Rise high and fly

The musician cries
As he sings a sweet song
He feels the same way
As he has for so long
The feeling of love and
The feeling of worth
Has all been crumbled
And put in the dirt
After a show he gets peace of mind
Finding room to breath
But still not all are kind

That night they caused him to crack
Pushed him to the limit
And that was that
He wrote one last song
Recorded it there, played it outloud
In case someone cared
Noose made from the strings of a guitar
He walked off the staff
And stopped his metronome heart

I can feel darkness
carving its name into my skin

Reaching for my heart
To take away my love

No protective barrier
So easily penetrated

So close now
I can feel despair

Please save me
I'm almost gone

Don't stand there
Save me...

I am now lost
To far gone

You stood there
Watched me suffer

Now feel the pain
That I once felt

I will stand here
As you scream my name

Never moving
I will watch your pain

For internity we will be together
Isn't that what we always wanted

Forever you will feel this pain
Forever you will scream my name

Forever we will share this pain
Forever we will scream each others name

I've heard it's possible to fly.
I've heard of people doing it.
Apparently if you push somebody around long enough, then they can.
I've heard they fly when they give up.
I've heard they fly without others knowing.
Apparently sticks and stones break the our bones, but words can make us fly.
I've heard that they cry.
I've heard they can't stand it.
Apparently they stop standing, and end up laying down like nothing ever happened.
I've heard that when you fly there's no turning back.
I've heard that sometimes flying breaks your neck.
Apparently when you fly you end up 6 feet in the ground.
I've heard it's possible to fly.

My heart is beating
Beating loud
Just not clear

My heart is beating
A steady beat
Yet it hurts

My heart is beating
Pumping blood through my veins
Just not enough

My heart is beating
Beating for the one I love
It just can't show her
                .......
My heart is no longer beating
No longer making a sound
It has lost its rythem
Now it is standing still
Blood now lays down in my veins

My heart has been broken
Broken by the one it truly loves

My heart is now dead in every way
Killed by the one that it loved