Dear Daddy,
Do you know what these men say to me?

With their
eyes and their mouths
when I walk on the street.

With a grin and a nod
and a look up and down.
A wink and a kiss
and a cat call heard from downtown.

With my skirt short
and my top
low,
It’s a cold world daddy
and no
doesn’t mean no.

Daddy do you know
how these men look at me?

Like I’m a piece of meat
strutting down the street?
With my head buds in
and my favorite song on.

I’m asking for it Daddy,
I’m in the wrong.

Do you know how it feels
not to wear what I like?

To walk a little faster
when I’m alone at night?

Daddy the world is my predator
and I am it's doe,
Daddy what happens
when I can’t say no?

I hadn't expected someone there
already before me.

Only lonely men come here
I heard him through my heavy breath
lonely with nothing and everything.

Down there was the sea rumbling faintly
with the froths painting themselves on the shore
like a sketch in a child's drawing book.

Height does amazing tricks, the man continued,
makes you feel invincible
stimulates you to be ****** into gravity
to fall as light as the feather.

The dusk was wrapping up the light
when I remembered having promised her
not to be late to descend.

There's a man up there, I told the gateman,
Nope, he said,
you were the only guest this evening.

She follows the words with grace.
The happiness of being alone
Holding the key to a new reality
Is all too familiar
To this little girl

Believing in you
Captured deep in your magic
I’m lost in your song

I go through the motions
Of the ocean waves
Haunted by illusions of control

I stumble and fall, into the water
Breathing it in
The poison burning my lungs
As I choke

I try to unlock
What lies beyond
But I am stiff and motionless

Emotionless
The corrosiveness
Eating at my very core

You wont see it

The lack of control
The rise and fall, of the waves
As they crash into me
As they wash me ashore

You wont see me cease to breathe
The water weighing my lungs down
The water making me bleed
With a full frontal collision

I am collateral damage
I am the aftermath of disaster
I am the sadness
Thereafter

I am the chaos, the calm,
The lightning and the fog
I am a motionless corpse

You wont see it
When I cough and stand
Brush off the sand
As I rise and stumble back into the ocean
As the waves destroy me once more
As my body is washed ashore
Again

You wont see me

When I nod and smile
While you speak
When I cheer, as you peak
When I fall to the ground
When you turn around
Never to get up again.

You give me the good ol' blues

I took you for the happy feels but the happy feels done gone

I'm close to tears again
It's not you
I'm just broken

Maybe I shouldn't have done what I just did

I took two ibuprofens
And two codeine pills

Yes I was in pain
But not the kind you think
I was suffocating
And needed to wash them down
With an ice cold drink

But now I'm numbing
The pressure subsided
I am a little lightheaded
It's not what I wanted

**** I shouldn't have done that
There's a slight thumping in my right temple
Hey?! Arent you supposed to be a painkiller?

I took you for the happy feels
Where the happy feels at?
I'm still broken, nauseous, and sad

I took you for the happy feels
But baby you give me the blues
My fork shakes as I hand it to you

Honey dont leave me
I'm lost and confused

I took you for the happy feels
But you gave me the blues

Baby baby, im red yellow and blue

Im listening to sad songs, singing the blues

Baby dont let me cry
I'm hurting

I feel each beat of my heart, pumping

You were my happy pill
Now I'm just lost and confused

I took you for the happy feels
But all you made me was blue.