I cannot eat
you from here, please,
come closer.

You are a flower
blooming in the
wrong season, no,
this isn't always about
you. So when
I sing to you I
sing to wind and
it was you who raised
my voice, so
high only
bats can hear.

Ruby or blood,
I am gonna have them both.
You don't worry
anyway because it
is my growth.

It's not ******* anymore.
And nothing to
do with pregnancy. The
stomachache is
genuine -- so pure and poor,
melodious chemical reactions of leftovers.

with a Polaroid camera
I captured you
I captured us
made us tangible
made you mine
face to face
skin to skin
rough hands
bringing me back to life
I've been cold for so long
A touch and a tremble
Ignites new flames
Consumes me
Soft sounds
Perfect chemistry
Unfamiliar devotion
Belonged to no one
Belongs to you now

Kiss my thoughts
Listen to my lips
Hold my heart
Feel my hips
Judge my motives
Understand my actions
Get drunk off of my love
Fill me with passion

I want to be your 911 and your favourite childhood blanket and I want to be your goodnight instead of your goodbye.
I want to be your favorite pair of shoes and the air beside you so that I'm always next to you and I know you're comfortable.  
I want to be my parents' "I knew she could do it" instead of their "she's not trying hard enough."
I want to be my friends' safety net and not their other 24hour emergency hotline-dial-me-when-you-need-me. I am not temporary.
I want to be a girl who smiles because the world engraved laugh lines in her gentle face and not a happy pill trapped mistake.

But I will never be those things.
I will never be those things because, in your eyes I will be the last cigarette in every pack that smells and tastes so good, but hurts your chest in the most unforgivable way.
But I will never be, for you.

And when you
            love someone;

their name
begins
to sound like
a song that
never leaves
       your
            head.


-Andrew Durst.