With Closed eyes and a grim face
Imposed lies paint a dim place
Dark and hollow with nothing around
Go ahead and scream you'll never be found
Keep going further down to your dismay
This ***** just beginning for sure it's just may
Etch up a symbol a portrait of hope
Catch up be nimble, forget about the *****
Hear the voices screaming in the night
Wake up you're dreaming, but everything's not alright
Blur out her memory one drink should do
Slur down what went wrong better yet make it two
Dig deeper into a false sense of relief
Tell yourself it didn't happen, I mean it's your own belief
Go on another liquor drenched ******
Talking to shadows, trying not to remember
You said you loved her, when was that? December.
4 years is a long time to be near
4 beers is a song, a chime to be clear
A melody to sooth and erase
But still you find yourself leading this chase?
**** if only you could forget her face
Close your eyes and drift off into sadness
Hearing the voices call in the madness
Still you'll sit just all alone
This darkness now is your "humble abode"
With no way out you soon decide
Contemplating the thought of suicide
The reality of all that was lost
All comes clear but at what cost
Now all thoughts and ambitions are tossed
Trapped in the dim dark place you come to know
You'll never get out you'll never just go
To forget her would be the key
To forget her is the lesson you see
There's no fixing or mending
No wishing or commending
It's just you and your thoughts in the dim to be

Shaking hands with warm embrace
Quaking words torn to erase
Doesn't just go away does it?
Just to know you say it does it?
With a gun to your head and them in your heart
You refuse to leave bed bc why even start
Just go to sleep at least there it's ok
That's just what you say isn't it?
A joke with no laugh I guess
Just a poke with a staff to that I digress
Becoming more convinced that you're ill
Short comings more intense almost surreal
Stop talking just to keep the silence
You stop walking just to sleep in the violence
Been drowning with no way to swim
Always frowning feeling so grimm
Someone else has them now it's over
Good for you take a bow you're sober
Why even push to be?
Why even push to see?
What's the achievement?
All it is is personal deceivement
This is who you are
This is who you are
Go back to your home
Go back to the bar

lights burn bright filling skies of grey
tonights the night that lies play
sickening and woahing an audience of one
burning a fire glowing for none
wrecking lives with plans they say to follow
tonight is the night lets pray for tomorrow
tonights the night that lies will play
some will leave you othrs will stay
burning down your statue with flames of dismay
tongues twisting lies set out to win
as young misting tides let us soak up the sin
tonights the night lies will play
tonights the night that sinners pray
forgiveness and salvation
for the ****** across the nation
yes tonights the night that lies will play
tonights the night what do you say

depression is my only confession my lord
I live a life of a sinner no saint
I am no winner but a loser so faint
I see my demons oh lord they're dressed in black
I see my demons oh lord they're calling me back
they see the splattered ink of my lies
they hear the shattered winks of my cries
I write the profanity streamed by conviction
but fueled but fueled by the insanity of an addicts addiction
not sane but not well
I say in vein I have seen hell
oh lord lead me not into temptation
for I am begging for salvation
its not just violence in the back of my site that gives fear
it's the silence in black and white that signals the end is near
no words to be spoken
I see now the line has been broken
I go now to sin again
I go now to begin the fin
lying back watching darkness unfold
nothing but silence I pray that words Ive been told
though I walk alone in the valley with the shadow of death
I pray not to take it this my last breath

being up or being down
should I swim or should I drown
demons a tailor and I have lost ties
demons a sailor and I have crossed lies
starry eyed wide a tumble
but isn't it to be true that's so humble
think it over pour my courage
I sink not sober is my porridge
flashes of lights like dreams less trying
clashed in the night dreamless I'm dying
take a step maybe a hobble
I wonder what if I was a bobble
a toss up for chance but dropped
a floss up a glace but flopped
conflicting actions with no remorse
just sifting fractions with in this course
no stop signs no lights left to flicker
no white lines no fights left to bicker
still so numb
and yet so undone
curled up alone in a ball of loss
all thoughts hurled up hear a call gosh
no writing or sense to be maid
I'm just subsiding not getting paid
pass out the nights been over
wake up do it again sober

why cant you understand
cant you see the shake in my hand
just leave and let me be ******
mentally I'm broken
physically I'm unspoken
this is hard to handle
I promise its no scandal
seas turn black where skys end
keys turn back the lies mend
all in all its a waste of time
just let me silent a mime
sew me up and tie me down
show me abrupt and cry for me drown
let your tears fall but don't be a weeze
let my fears call it won't be oh geeze
its scary everyday
its scary everyway
just want ot turn back the time
**** it all pause this for a dime
I know that I'm sick
skins just too thick
she left me now still a falsetto
I wish this feeling was just a placebo
paused the write to rethink the act
caused the fight to unsink the cracked
ship wrecked no anchor
hip checked no banker
just falling down
down
down
down
starting to drown
drown
drown
drown

I don't know why my mind does this stuff
I guess I can take it though gotta be tough
when will it stop
I mean really though when am I gonna just drop
I am the thesis of her sadness
jesus, just stop the madness
another night sitting alone
another fight my temper was blown
I guess I flipped and just tweaked
I guess It just slipped emotions peaked
calm still not keeping the cool
drawn thrill shes sleeping for school
I guess its a tempo thing
or maybe a "then go" thing
almost midnight still not sure exactly what this is
almost mid fight she said your exactly what caused this
I mean why let it cut in so deep
just leave why lose all that sleep
right?
wanting to drink
instead just sitting to think
maybe I can just blink and it'll be over
restart find some luck yeah lol a clover
a horse shoe maybe an oracle
naw just setting out looking for a miracle
its like the same thing here and there
a name thing not a hear it here heard it there
maybe shes right
maybe I should just catch a flight
out the door and onto the street
who knows the people I could meet
drunk and clueless its bound to be neat
then again why surrender to the hostility  
like why render to the thought of prosperity
probably wont sleep typical night
my thoughts up all night basically a fight
so I write and complain
maybe i'll kick something up to take in vein
just go for a walk
then we can talk maybe
I guess i'll do that that's what they say in therapy