There's something out there,
and I'm going to find it.
Some times you'll realize,
the glass slipper isn't the right fit.
Don't get discouraged,
just keep on fighting,
you'll find it get's easier as you go.

I've grown not just in size,
but inside.
I've slowly molded myself,
with the help of friends.
I've almost faced the end,
but I'm breathing,
and I'm smiling.

I don't know what's going to happen next,
I just know that I'll take it with a smile and deep breath,
I'll embrace and it take it as a brand new chance,
to become something I'm not.

This life has been brutal,
relentless and rough,
but I'm battle tested now,
thick-skinned and tough,
I'm ready for whatever,
this life has to offer,
so let's go,
bring it on.

This out of tune piano,
knows just how I feel.
Each key I play,
cries in disharmony.

No difference in the keys,
than in my life today.
No difference in my mind,
than what I play.

Broken rhythms and fragmented thoughts,
are all I have left in this splintered heart.

Why can't I find myself?
Why can't I find a way?
Why can't I live my life
without feeling my life has frayed?

The ends are frayed.

****
you
for
not
knowing
me
For
not
understanding
For
not
caring
For
breaking
me
down
****
you
f­­or
nothing
For
not
believing
For
not
seeing
For
nothing
****
you­
****
you
****
you
****
you
****
you
and
****
me

Velvet halls,
I can hear them singing.
Just to be home,
would be a blessing.

To hold you in the sheets,
and rub our cold feet,
is all I want right now.

We will grow old,
just not together.

Tell Benjamin that I love him,
and tell my mom she is my world.
Tell my sister I missed her,
and tell my brother he's a ****.

I can feel myself leaving,
don't let me go,
don't let me go,
don't let me go.

I watched as you washed your hands of me,
I can't figure out why you're leaving.

So far from perfect, I am just a man,
but I don't expect you to understand.

The leaves are changing and it's getting cold,
I'll find someone new, or so I'm told.

There's no way to explain how I feel,
my skin is smooth and cold as steel,
my heart is broken and it won't heal,
because of you.

Late nights, late thoughts have me still awake,
I don't know how much more my heart can take.

My blank white walls remind me of your face,
the day you left, you left me in this place,
I hate it.

Tear down the walls and tear up the floors,
I can't live in this house anymore,
need to forget the memories we formed,
inside these walls.
It's finally Fall.

The world is so **** dark, I can't see a thing.
I'm blinded by my own insignificance.
Something tells me I need to run away,
but I can't find the strength to stand.

Broken bones shelter this broken heart,
the outside looks okay, but I'm falling apart.
I'm trying to find the right words to say,
but I know I can't make you stay.

Lacerations on my heart,
you cut so deep,
you left so many scars.
And I thought you were not the girl,
who would take it all and run,
but clearly I was mistaken.

Now I sit here on my doorstep,
thinking of all the spider webs,
tangled up inside my head,
I can't seem to escape.

The more I struggle, the worse it gets,
like I'm fighting an undertow.
I'm fighting for my hopeless life,
maybe I'll just let go.

I hope I die real slow.

It's hard to say how he felt,
when he heard my voice,
when he opened the passenger door,
and sat right next to me.

I wasn't sure,
if what I was doing was a bad idea,
but when that man sat next to me,
I felt quite content.

The rain fell down on the street,
as he looked down at his feet,
I asked him where to go,
and he pointed ahead.

As we drove through the driving rain,
he asked me for my name,
and I told him,
and he said...

"My name is Convicton,
I moved here last year,
with my wife and my kid,
now I live here."

I looked and I smiled,
told him that was neat,
asked where he was from,
then he looked at me...

"I moved here from Haiti,
after the earthquake.
God blessed me with life,
and I'm not going to waste it."

As he told me to turn right,
I asked him why,
why did he move here,
and what made him keep trying.

And he told me, "Gods blessings,
he sends them to me,
in the forms of small things,
in the forms of thee."

And he smiled at me,
as he told me to stop.
I pulled over and told him,
it was nice to talk.

He grabbed his laundry,
and closed the back door.
I looked out the passenger window,
and waved au revoir.

He smiled at me,
and told me "God bless!".
Then he shuffled away,
into his house.

And as shifted into drive,
and slowly drove away,
I smiled and thought,
"one good deed a day".

Satan, please,
look at me.
I'm not asking,
I'm begging.

Satan, please,
punish me.
I'm not asking,
I'm begging.

Satan, please,
**** me.
I'm not asking,
I'm begging.

Satan, please,
**** me.
I'm not asking,
I'm begging.

I see you there,
in the shards of dreams.
Quietly, I walk,
but every step I take,
results in another break,
in the skies fragile skin.

I don't want to be who I am,
but there's no turning back.
I'm who I am but am I who,
you want me to be?

In the eyes of my reflection,
I see a boy,
no,
a man,
but he's trying to break free.

Nothing's quite the same anymore,
and it's not getting any better.

Fire on the skyline,
shades of days before.
I am nothing more,
than dried up, shattered dreams.

Sometimes I sit on the curb,
and watch the city come alive.
Sometimes I sit in the park,
and watch the clouds roll by.

I've been thinking and thinking about how I'm shrinking,
I've almost disappeared.

I live in a basement and I'm some what complacent,
with how I'm living in fear.

I spend every Monday, Wednesday and Friday,
exchanging strange glances with peers.

But for the first time in years,
I'm happy.

I haven't seen any of my friends,
in about over a month.
It's strange how we live our lives,
like we don't realize we live once.
There's no time for teary eyes,
your smile's as bright as the sun.
Let love and life inside,
and you'll realize your life has begun.

Look forward to each new day,
let go of the days that have passed.
This life we live is a joke,
don't forget to laugh.

I found the reason for all our lies,
to cover up our ****** up minds,
to cover up all the crimes,
committed by mankind over time.

We ****, corrupt, and capitalize,
on all the forsaken, innocent cries,
and then we try to rationalize,
our reason for profiting from their demise.

The blood is on the hands of the mindless,
sitting back, thinking these issues are timeless,
do you really think the people are buying this?
Do you really think you can keep us blinded?

No more closed doors, no more closed minds,
we need someone willing to walk the line,
someone willing to argue both sides,
someone willing to lead us, not hide.

No more government fundraiser *****,
no more vacations, answer the call,
this nation needs someone to stand strong and tall,
this nation needs us,
the people
one nation,
under God,
indivisible,
with liberty,
and justice,
for all.

Disconnect,
pull the plug.
Reboot program,
start again.
Don't try to reconnect.
Don't try to reprogram.

I'm now new,
moving on.
You'll forget,
once I'm gone.

Delete memories,
cut all ties.
Before you know it,
time goes by.

Before you know it,
memories die.

Before you know it...

I am the forgotten,
the memory,
the drifter,
the lost.

I am the stranger,
the bystander
the loser,
the tossed.

I am the deleted,
the erased.

I am the blank,
forgotten face.

I am the last breath,
you want to waste.

I am the forgotten,
and so I will remain.

Never burn your bridges,
now is not the time.
Ignorance is a disease,
and it plagues mankind.

We're slipping, down, down, down,
don't try to defend yourself.
Your actions make you who,
who you are.

The towers topple down,
onto the heads of the dead.
Heartbeat has gone quiet,
no one uses their head.

You preach for peace and love,
but you don't practice it.
Ask me where we're going,
I'd say we've gone-to-****.

And there's no question now,
we're a lost generation.
There's no question now,
we can't stop our damnation.

I keep digging,
deeper into this hole,
and the further I go,
the more I die.

It's like a I'm digging,
into my heart,
and I can't dig any farther.

I rip out roots,
I rip out rocks,
no matter how much it pains me,
I just can't stop.

Something inside,
is melting me away,
from the inside out.

Do you know me,
know my name?
Do you see me,
going insane?
Reach out to me,
ease the pain.
Just don't let me die here.

Deeper and deeper,
into the flesh,
it's such a mess,
a beautiful one.

I'm in too deep,
there's no way out,
but that's not what,
I care about.

Somewhere down here,
somewhere inside,
I am alive,
buried alive.

Blind emotions,
hold up my mask,
and it's sown to my face...
it's sown to my face...

Broken will leaves me,
shattered on the floor.
I know I'll get back up,
but I can't take much more.

Eyes are grey and they,
can't help but water.
My legs quiver as I,
wonder why I bother.

My time here isn't long,
it's here and then it's gone,
so why do I keep fighting on.

For my mother,
for my father.
For my brother,
and my grandmother.

For my friends,
and for my family.
For my kids,
which I've yet to see.

For my dog,
and for my neighbors.
For all these people,
they are my saviors.

They keep this heart,
from stopping short.
They show my life,
has some worth.
They are my heroes.

Nothing comes in a day,
instant gratification, the American way.
Give it to me
give it to me now.
I'm not waiting.

It's our new way,
we won't take no for an answer.
Make it quick,
fry it,
whatever it takes.

I'll ingest whatever it takes,
to make myself skinny by show time.
My interests are in a woman,
that I can get to love me by the end of the night.

There's always tomorrow,
but no one wants to wait that long,
when we can get what we want,
almost instantly.

Instant gratification,
more of a mind set than an actual need.
But we love to feed,
our impulsive behaviors.

Sky glassed with pink,
makes me wonder,
makes me think.
How big am I?

In a lifetime,
how bright,
how bright will I shine?
How big am I?

Is there a place,
either here,
or in space,
for me?

What good am I?
If only I tried.

But nothing goes unknown,
except the vast planes of mother Earth,
the deep caverns and crevasses.

So when will I,
shine bright?
When will I,
have my time?

God only knows,
if God even holds the cards.

So I will wait,
staring at the glassy pink sky,
wait for my time,
for my moment.

Quiet remains the room,
with paintings on the walls.
Silent is the tomb,
in which I lay in unrest.

Leave no stone unturned,
in search for sacrifice.
Live and die by word,
is to live a life of love.

No questions please, I'm a dancer,
some of the best questions,
go unanswered.

And so I will be,
what I am.
And so I will do,
all I can.

And so I will feed,
you by hand.
And so I will teach,
you to stand.

Delivered by love,
I will send you.

Catacombs of my lives,
deep and dark inside,
penetrate my awful mind,
stick the needle in deep.

I feel you in my heart,
the venom stings and burns,
but still my heart yearns,
when will I learn?

I hope you understand,
I did this because of you.
Don't mistaken it for an accident.

Breaking the bonds,
the world is collapsing from the inside out.
What's the fuss about?
You made me do it.

Demons unleashed,
from the bottomless pits of hell.
So tolls the bell,
you made me do it.

Nothing here,
is something there.
But I don't care,
you made me do it.

All my life,
I've been in pain.
All of this life,
drives me insane.
In the aftermath,
nothing has changed.
Walking this path,
I'm my own bane.

Where do I go?
This life has led me nowhere.
Does anyone know?
Why do they all stare?

All my life,
felt like a fool.
All of this life,
has me losing my cool.
In the aftermath,
just a cesspool.
Lies and hate,
I lose the duel.

Where do I go?
There's no guiding light.
Can't take it slow,
or else I'll lose sight,
of the future,
of myself.

I caught you,
in a glimpse of time.
I can't seem to find the photo,
half burnt in the fire.

Golden sky,
painted with fire.
I hear the voices,
in unison, like a choir.

Jump start my heart,
make me move.
We both know,
we have nothing to lose.

Take a photograph,
take one of me.
Then tear it apart,
and watch it bleed.

I know there's love,
I just don't know where.
I can see,
right through your stare.

Jump start my heart,
make me move.
I'm stalling out,
I'm yours to lose.

Walking so delicately,
down the riverbank.
Touching the water softly,
by the riverbank.

How I wish we still,
had it all.
Not everything is meant to be,
some things must fall.

I remember when we use to,
sit here for hours.
Looking up at the trees,
and how they towered over us.

I thought that maybe,
we weren't the same.
But turns out,
we all play love's game.

I held you and you held me,
it was magic.
But soon we drifted out of reach,
it was tragic.

We were meddling teenagers,
no surprises.
But thing fall down, crumble apart,
when we're left to our own devices.

I wouldn't say I hate you,
and I hope you don't hate me.
Things just didn't work,
and that's how it has to be.

How I wish we still,
had it all.
Not everything it meant to be,
some things must fall.

But next time,
you crumble down,
fall to the ground,
I will be there.

Next time,
you think it's the end,
and you need a friend,
I will be there.

Because although we are no longer one,
and although our time has come and gone,
I still believe in love after all,
and so I will be there.

I found you standing there,
in the corner of a big room.
I could see in your eyes,
you were a flower ready to bloom.

You were ready to go,
ready to see the world.
You were all alone,
just another lonely girl.

Like the moon in the night sky,
so far from the stars.
You were in need of a friend,
to help heal the scars.

And so I reached out,
and you took my hand,
and we explored the high mountains,
and put our toes in the sand.

We ran through the valleys,
and flew through the sky.
We walked through the forest,
and laughed till we cried.

We looked up at the stars,
so far yet so close,
so big yet so small,
we wanted them all.

And so we became stars.

I write to you now from the bunker,
beneath the surface of what was once London.
The earth around me shakes,
it quivers and quakes,
as sand falls from the cracks in the walls.

I don't want you to worry about me,
I'll return home eventually, one way or another.
I hope this letter finds you,
when the sky is blue,
and the sun shines down on our beautiful son.

I want you to always remember,
with or without me, you're the strongest girl I know.
You're going far in this world,
your voice will be heard,
and you are only are strong as you think you are.

So reach for the stars,
my love.

I'm sure we'll meet again.

I wait for the mail man,
each day I say hello,
as he puts the mail in my hand,
he just grunts and drives on.

I wave as people pass by,
sitting on my balcony,
but no one ever says hi,
they just go on their merry way.

I find it funny,
like a practical joke,
played on everyone.

It's kind of funny,
this life that we live,
it's not for everyone.

I mow my lawn,
every other weekend,
it's the same old song,
just a new day.

I watch the sun set,
sitting on my balcony,
I think of when we met,
boy, it was so long ago.

But I find it funny,
like a practical joke,
played on everyone.

It's kind of funny,
this life that we live,
it's not for everyone.

And it feels like I'm always alone,
and it feels like I'm left in the cold.
I feel like I've never been home,
maybe I haven't been so.

I watch the sun rise,
hanging from my balcony.

I'm shutting down,
permanently.

The gears in my head,
jammed with the words that you said.
They can't turn,
or spin,
or move,
you win.

I'm leaving now,
forever.

Once my wheels hit the road,
there's no coming home.
I'll vanish,
disappear,
into thin air,
and you'll never hear from me again.

Like a cloud in the sky,
I'll move on.

I'll forget everything, erased,
like your name and your face.
I'll forget you,
delete you,
and never will I,
speak of you.

Because I'm moving on.

Like a cloud in the sky,
I'm moving on.

You stare and watch me bleed,
the blood blankets my face.
I'm on my hands and knees,
is this what you wanted?

You laugh and cheer and chant,
like cultists around a sacrifice.
I can see what you can't,
even through the blood in my eyes.

I am here and I'm alive,
I am going to survive.

And what you don't know,
is that I will grow,
and be better than before.

I feel cut off at the knees,
trained to eat out of your hand.
What I would give to be free,
an arm and a leg would be fine.

I feel like a broken record,
or maybe the average televangelist.
My words repeat over and over,
but no one cares to listen.

I am here and I'm alive,
I am going to survive.

And what you don't know,
is that I will grow,
and be better than before.

I'm standing in the rain,
I'm waiting for your love,
I can't rid of this pain,
so I wait to die.

I miss your spearmint breath,
the way you kissed my lips,
I try to feel what's left,
but there's never enough time.

I'm never gonna fall again,
never gonna love a friend,
never gonna give my heart,
I'm gonna burn all your art.

Everything we have left,
is gonna burn with the rest,
I need you out of my head,
forget everything you said.

There's a fire deep inside,
it rages and it burns,
it's keeping me alive,
but I'm running out of time.

I'm standing in the rain,
I'm wasting my time,
you're driving me insane,
but I don't really mind.

I'm never gonna forget,
everything was perfect,
but everything changes,
strange how it rearranges.

I don't really mind though,
if you have to go.
I'm already insane,
so this is nothing new.

I'm waiting in the rain.

Galactic heartbreak,
spanning from planet to ocean,
to mind to soul,
nothing is whole without something.

I feel the gravity,
my spine bends and cracks,
I will go to the end of the earth for you,
but I won't come back.

You're a wonder,
a special puzzle piece.
Don't let anyone tell you differently,
you shine.

Like a sun in the sky,
you shine.
Like a star way up high,
you shine.
Like a lantern in the night,
you shine.

I can't believe you were mine.

Rip,
tear,
sever,
snap.

Break this heart in half.

Carve out my insides,
cook them, and me, alive.
Sprinkle pepper,
salt,
oregano.

Roast me nice and slow.

Feast,
eat,
enjoy your meal.

Forget my name,
our love,
not real.

And for dessert,
please eat my heart.

Now we will never be apart.

I never believed in love,
until I saw you standing there,
a flower in your hair.

I can't remember,
the last time,
I spent a day not thinking,
it's been such a long time.

Spent my life thinking you were the one,
looks like I was wrong.

My wall is covered in post it notes,
words and lines written on them,
but I still can't put them together.

I'm too busy picking up the pieces,
of a broken heart, you see.

I look for pieces scattered on the floor,
but they're just too small to see.

There just too small to see.

Foster,
this lost soul.
I let it live,
inside of me.

Harvest,
a new heart.
I let it beat,
inside of me.

Grow,
a new hope.
Let it prosper,
inside of me.

Just know,
I won't go.
Let you,
destroy me.

I heard you moved,
out of town.
Somewhere far away,
and I'm still waiting here.

And to think I was foolish enough,
to believe every word you said.
Let you and your lies,
get inside my head.

Sometimes I go to the grocery store,
just to make conversation.
Usually no one talks back.

So I give them my money,
the little I have left,
and take my candy bar,
and walk away.

I can feel them staring,
at me as I walk away.
I can feel your heartbeat,
why didn't you stay?

Read a book on moving on,
and it made me regress.
So I threw it in the fire.

I wonder if you're thinking of me,
or if I'm the only one.
I hurt just beneath the surface,
my insides are melting.

I can't seem to find,
a way to forget.
My mind says let go,
but my heart says no.

So if you're looking for me,
I'm most likely at the grocery store,
talking to all the cashiers.

Sitting at home,
I can't write.
The TV is too loud,
and Jerry Springer's not my thing.
I try to think, what exactly is my purpose,
but I always draw a blank.
Maybe I'm here to run a circus,
I only said that because it rhymes.

I just can't see life,
in my old brown eyes.
I can't seem to fight,
these feelings inside.

I go bowling on Tuesdays.
I stand there in silence,
take my turn when it comes.
I look around but no one understands me,
they just know me as Barry.
I wonder if they even care for me,
or if I'm just some lonely fool.

I just can't see life,
in my old brown eyes.
I can't seem to fight,
these feelings inside.

Dropped out of school and lost my mind.
My teacher said I'm lazy,
or maybe I just don't like school.
The thought of growing older bothers me,
it makes me uneasy.
I really don't mind getting grey hairs,
I just don't like dying.

I'm a nothing,
a no one,
a loser,
a fool.

I sit silent,
I lose myself,
I am a fool.

And I just can't see life,
in my old brown eyes.
I can't seem to fight,
these feelings inside.

I took his word,
he took his life.
He told me everything,
told me he was alright.

Life so fragile, it shatters when you touch it,
the world wasn't ready for him.
He wasn't ready for the world,
on a collision course.

The angels called for him,
and he left in the night.

The air is cold,
I see my breath.
Somehow, I think of you,
I still can't rest.

And to think it's been almost three years,
since I last saw your face.
Sometimes I can't believe it,
this worlds a cruel place.

The angels called for him,
and he left in the night.

I see your face,
in everything.
From smoke to the mirror,
I feel nothing.

Sometimes I question what I could have done,
to make sure you stayed here.
You always seemed a happy soul,
or maybe you knew the end was near.

I wish I could bring you back,
but we all know you'd disappear.
You left for a reason,
but I wish you were still here.

The angels called for him,
and he left in the night.

I always thought you were beautiful,
in my eyes, nothing less than perfection.
The way you spoke to me, so softly,
your voice like an angels, so heavenly.

I was far from the perfect man,
I tried my best to be what you wanted.
There's no doubt, I made mistakes,
always the wrong time, wrong place.

Don't make me plea and beg,
don't push my buttons,
get in my head.

I just want you to understand,
I'll always love you,
show it every chance I get.

You never liked me,
hated everything about me.

Left me to die,
but I'm still alive.

There's a sour taste in the air,
our room's been ransacked,
everything is gone.
You smile but say nothing,
you look me in the eyes,
something is wrong.

I can feel the house crumbling,
the pressure is too much,
nothing to say.
Your mouth moves, spitting venom,
but nothing comes out,
there's too much pain.

I can see you standing there,
you make no movement,
like a brick wall.
You look right through me,
like a sheet of glass,
I'm nothing at all.

Then you walk out the door,
walk right through me,
I'm nothing.
You don't look back,
don't turn back,
I'm nothing.

I've had dreams recently,
dreams of happier times,
where I have my mind.

I wake up every morning,
thinking they were real,
at least that's how they feel.

Walk into the bathroom,
see myself in the mirror,
if I listen, I still hear her.

Wash my face, brush my teeth,
swallow my pills and make believe.

I don't want to keep on fighting,
if it's just going to hurt,
even more than before.

I fear the world and all it has,
all it can take,
all that's at stake.

The odds are against me,
my chances of surviving,
as slim as getting struck by lightning,
a second time.

If I swallow these pills,
and let them control me,
what will become,
of me?

Spin my head around,
and make sure it don't stop.
The world is better blurred,
and better when your on top.

The sky is orange, red,
and even purple too.
The sun set on today,
but not on me and you.

The mind is an ocean,
vast and unknown.
It's hard to settle down,
and find a place called home.

I know I don't make sense,
most of the time.
But to me that's fine,
I don't really mind.

I hope you understand,
my condition is strange.
I like chaos and turmoil,
and hate when things change.

Please follow me,
to the ends of the Earth.
Don't stray far,
you might lose me.

The music's playing loud,
people are on their feet.
Not a single person,
is sitting in their seat.

Bass vibrates the heart,
guitar blows the mind,
lyrics save the soul,
having a good time.

Listen to the groove,
see the people move.
Time is on our side,
dancing through the night.

Everyone is free,
dancing around me.
Time is on our side,
we feel so alive.

Don't stop the beat,
don't stop the heat,
don't stop the sound,
till we hit the ground.

Music in our veins,
pumping through our hearts.
Hope you love the sound,
cause this is just the start.

Together, we are one,
tonight, we are friends,
tomorrow, we'll reminisce,
but for now, it never ends.

Some people tell me,
there's something out there.
Everyone has a calling,
yours is just not there.
Sometimes I wonder,
what they even know,
or if they even care.

Risen and fallen,
I know the feeling.
Fell face first before,
hit my head on the ceiling.
Can't seem to break out,
of these **** walls,
and they're peeling.

Everyday goes by,
nothing seems to change.
It's like I'm living days over,
they all seem the same.
Late at night, I lay in bed,
wondering exactly how,
to win this game.

So I ride the waves,
until they hit the shore.
Ride back out and repeat,
like it's not a bore.
This life I live is nothing special,
just another life,
and nothing more.

If I was smarter,
I could save the world.
If I was stronger,
I could get the girl.

If I was talented,
I'd write a song for peace.
But I'm not special,
to say the least.

I'm just here,
I'm just there.
I'm just lost,
I'm nowhere.

I'm alive,
but I'm dead.
I'm inside,
my own head.

I won't be long,
don't mind me.
My stay here,
temporary.

I'll amount,
to nothing.

Sometimes I feel,
like a tile on the floor.
A single tile,
and nothing more.

Dirt embedded,
in my cracks.
Covered in,
everyone's tracks.

Walked all over,
by the world.
In need of mending,
I go unheard.

So I lay here,
cemented in place.
Trapped in this life,
I can't escape.

Sometimes I wonder,
how much longer I have left.
I want to know how many years,
so I can make them my best.
No one knows their timeline,
but I want mine.

But if I never find out,
how much longer I'm alive,
I guess that's okay with me,
it's better a surprise.
I'll take each day with a smile,
cause that's all I can do,
and so can you.

What happened to the child,
the one that smiled all the time?
What happened to the boy,
that made the sun shine?

I don't know why I feel,
the way I seem to.
Buried in my grave, alive,
don't know what to do.

I've spent years and years,
listening to doctors say I'll be fine.
But that doesn't really mean,
I'm alright.

If I believe in the doctors,
swallow all the pills they say,
will there ever come a day,
I finally feel okay?

I wish I was taller,
stronger,
faster,
smarter.
My heart hurts,
I'm emotionally unstable,
don't sit across a table,
or a room,
and tell me about my mind.
Don't sit there and tell me,
I'll be fine.

I'm afraid of myself,
of being alone,
I have no home.

I fear the disease,
it eats at me,
and I can't stop it.

But if I keep a smile on my face,
if I wake up to a new day,
that's good enough for me,
that gives me a little faith.

Reaching back, to the past,
hoping to pull something out of the wreck.
Nothing remains, but a fiery mess,
everything has changed.

I walk alone, down a lonely road,
I can't look back,
because if I do,
I won't continue.

I fight forward, struggling onward,
I leave everything.

Every name,
every touch,
every kiss,
every bit of love.

All of it.

I'm leaving you behind.

Fear in the bones,
fears I know,
all too well.

The chaos is raw,
what's wrong,
with me.

My legs are numb,
I can't run,
trapped.

I see the fire,
burning higher,
burn alive.

Cease all ****** functions,
I've reached a junction,
I'm through.

Surrender to it,
say you knew it,
I'm weak.

Sitting here wishing on a wishing well,
praying I can escape this hell.
Slit your wrists, just to get a taste,
then spread your blood all over my face.

Let me in, but not too close,
we both know how these things go.
Just let me feel you silk soft lips,
just let me grab those bony hips.

Days go passing by,
and I still don't know why.
All the days I've spent,
and how they came and went.

Sun sets over the ocean,
I'm trapped in the Earths motion.
Rotating, day after day,
everything's repeating, the same.

Hold me tight,
don't let me go,
just let me know,
I'll be okay.

Into the late hours,
of the darkest nights,
tell me good, despite,
the blood we're losing.

Hear the buzz,
they're questioning the mountains.
The halls of decadence,
the hum resonates with sin.

Their words echo,
far beyond the stretches of our universe.
Like a chant,
like witches muttering a curse.

Do not move,
there's a dead man in the gallows.
We're on thin ice,
and the water below isn't shallow.

To fear or not,
when fear is not a choice.
Be careful when using,
the power of your voice.