I feel afraid,
afraid to hold your hand,
because I know,
I won't be your only man.

I feel afraid,
to tell you how I feel,
because I know,
that none of this is real.

I'll put my faith in tomorrow,
knowing it won't run away.
I know I have a future,
and I know that you can't stay.

So please,
don't make me,
say go.

Don't tell me,
what we have is real.
I know how,
you really feel.

Don't tell me,
you love my laugh.
This love is false,
it will not last.

I've never been one to let in,
the people who love me most.
I've been let down too much,
to let someone in too close.

So please,
don't make me,
say go.

I don't want you to go.
I just want you to know...

Lying here on a cold concrete floor,
thinking there has to be something more.
I know there's a God, but where is he now?
Please pick me up, from this lost and found.

I've been lying here, for what feels like years,
thinking about all my many fears.
So lifeless, so ready to die,
can you make me feel alive?

The room is flooding, filling with my blood,
I'm fine with drowning, 'cause I've had enough.
So watch me die, outside your one way glass,
and don't you dare save me, I want this feeling to last.

See the man on the TV,
talking to you and me.
Hear his words, so enticing,
they almost make you believe.

The world is slowly burning,
we need a savior now.
People want to believe,
but they just don't know how.

Far inside big closed doors,
sit politicians and liars.
They scheme and plot our persuasion,
and we just put on our blinders.

This cycle is getting old now,
perpetual lies and commitments.
Just set the world on fire,
and we promise we'll sit through it.

Nothings going to change here,
we don't mind burning alive.
Just make sure we all get,
a fair slice of the pie.

The world is standing there blindly,
no one stops, no one cares.
The world is stuck in sixth gear,
riding the conveyor belts they share.

I see myself in a white room,
standing, facing the television.
The news is twisting and turning,
turning and twisting our vision.

We love our nuclear baby,
we love polluting our cities.
We love to nurture bad behaviors,
we love bombing with no pity.

We love watching the TV,
we love seeing destruction.
We love all the disarray,
we love political eruptions.

Keep on marching,
mindlessly marching,
raise the corporate flags high.

Let them consume you,
while you consume their fast food,
we all have money on our minds.

Try to pick up a girl,
I get called a pervert.
She's ******* dressed,
I mean, just look at her.

Say she looks beautiful,
compliment her hair.
She says I'm thirsty,
so she "curves" me,
I'm out of here.

They think we're pigs,
because we try to show we love her.
All they want is Efron,
Tatum, Franco, Lautner.

They live in fantasy,
separate from you and me.
What are they waiting for?
Your prince isn't coming girl!

They're crazy.

I try to be the nice guy,
instead I'm told to go home.
Next time I see her,
she's put me in the Friendzone.

She likes an *******,
tells me I'm a ****.
But isn't he,
the same as me,
nothing I say works.

They get jealous,
'cause we talk to other girls.
I'm in her Friendzone though,
why does it concern her?

They live in fantasy,
separate from you and me.
What are they waiting for?
Your prince isn't coming girl!

They're just delusional!

Through atmospheres,
into outer space.
There is no bond,
we cannot break.

We'll travel through,
all time and space.
Make our great,
getaway.

No gravity,
can bring us down,
no, nothing can,
ever hurt us now.

Pioneers,
of space and love.
We navigate,
towards the sun.

The heat is strong,
but not enough.
Nothing can,
deter us.

This empty space,
your beautiful face,
is all I need,
all I need.

Farewell dreamscape,
full of mystery,
full of history,
full of life.

Farewell dreamscape,
land of love,
shining suns,
brilliant moons.

Farewell dreamscape,
my one true home,
now my mind roams,
into the unknown.

Farewell dreamscape,
my one escape,
I know I can't take,
you with me.

I fear I can't,
take you with me.

Systems fail,
we're going down.
In the air,
questions roam.
Do not care,
about you.
Break me down,
is all you do.

I'm ejecting,
I'm perfecting,
every step I take,
is away from you.

Going down,
with the ship.
You put a hole,
in the side of it.
Sabotage,
you hated me.
And so this ship,
I'm abandoning.

I'm jumping ship,
you'll sink with it,
I hope you drown,
in your ocean.

I'm escaping,
don't need your ****,
I'm sick of it,
I'm getting out of here.

Can you feel,
from far away?
Travelling sound,
can't escape.

Travelling words,
twist their shape.
World on thin ice,
filled with hate.

Together we make,
united we create,
peace.

Bombs go off,
incinerate.
One bullet,
is all it takes.

One true lie,
seals our fate.
Biggest gun,
takes the cake.

Together we make,
united we create,
peace.

It echos, untamed,
the words of man,
their actions, unchanged,
their thoughts, deranged.

We know the right path,
we remember our past,
but still be choose to craft,
a future built on mistakes,
one domino is all it takes,
destroy what we create.

But together we make,
united we create,
peace.

Together we are,
united we become,
one.

Black and white,
the starry night.
Suns shine bright,
darkness consumes.

Both the sky,
and my mind.
Over time,
I will collapse.

Love relapse,
fall into the past.
I lose my grasp,
on reality.

****** right in,
by my own sin.
I let it win,
I'm giving up.

Losing sight,
of real life,
I'm trapped in an illusion,
delusional again.

I am inevitable,
destined to do it.
Designed to fail,
and prepared to lose it.

I know I will crack,
crumble and fall.
But can I handle it,
losing it all.

Is there an escape?
A way out of here?
Or will succumb,
to my greatest fear.

Losing you,
will tear me apart.
And with you, you take,
my precious heart.

I'm deranged,
if I stay,
I will remain.
If I go,
I will change.

Can you let me go?
Will I survive,
I don't know.
If you hold me here,
I'll surely implode.

Unlock the handcuffs,
set me free,
I need new love.
I need to breathe,
your grip tightens up.

I can't open my eyes,
you keep them shut,
keep me blind.
You have my heart,
and my mind.

I will slowly die,
as you watch,
enjoying my demise.

As long as you hold,
my heart in your hand,
like piece of gold,
turning to sand.

I can feel you,
radiating unto me.

Love and pain,
we go unseen.

You're my plutonium,
my queen.

I'm nothing,
a dying ****,
maybe.

Pull me up,
roots and all please.

In the hole,
plant a seed.

Watch it grow,
watch it bleed.

Heal its wounds,
make it believe,
then toss it aside,
when it becomes a ****,
like me.

Cracking and crunching,
shredding into bits,
leaves beneath my feet,
a year gone too quick.

I reminisce,
but not for long.
I don't get hung up,
on old love songs.

The ground is soft,
my mind is lost,
my love is strong,
another year gone.  

Another love lost,
tossed aside.
They say life *****,
they sure got that right.

A harsh winter,
I'll need to survive,
but with a new year,
comes a new life.

I will rise,
from the ashes of my burnt corpse.
I will begin anew,
set sail upon a new course.

And I will begin again.

We stand on separate shores,
we stand on separate worlds,
millions of miles away.

I feel as though time and space,
hold as both at bay,
far from where our hands can touch.

From far, I can still feel your love,
but that is not enough,
what I would do just to see your face.

Just to be in the same place,
just to have the bittersweet taste,
of your lips.

But we sit on different planes,
different dimensions,
far, far away,
so I wait.

Search and see the sun,
go out and feel the rain,
just realize,
the pain will go away.

Go and smell the flowers,
breathe in the air,
move without a care.

Electric love is coming for you,
spark the heart and make it move.
Make it pump and make it jump,
love is more than me and you.

There's no need to talk,
there's no need to waste,
the precious time we have,
we're near our end, I can taste it.

Take your mask off,
and I'll take mine off too.
We both have nothing to lose.

Let the vines entangle and trap,
your heart in their tight grasp.
Don't uproot what we can't lose,
you'll find it hard to get back.

I'm a sinner,
I'm a survivor.
I'm a sinner,
I'll survive her.
I'm a sinner,
I'll revive her.
I'm a sinner,
I'm a survivor.

There is a home,
and it's waiting for me.
It travels in the sky,
over the neon cities.

I've been searching,
years have come and gone.
It eludes me still,
and I can't help but feel wronged.

I look up at the stars,
on the clearest of nights.
I chase the sun,
from the second it rises,
but still I can't find it,
my home in the sky.

Maybe I'll question,
if I'm even alive.
You're the one who told me,
I'd never survive.

From time to time,
I find myself running with the clouds.
I have little faith,
not enough to toss around.

I stare at the moon,
watch it reflect down unto me.
Is there any hope left,
for a man so petty?
I'm more than ready,
for my home in the sky.

Take me now or take me never,
my home in the sky,
I won't wait forever.

Take me now before I take it all,
and throw it away,
I'll throw it away.

I want to feel the fire,
I want to feel it dance in my heart.
I want to feel alive,
life is an art.

I'm living this life,
the way I want to live.
You may not like,
the way that I think.

But this is my life,
and I'm going to ignite,
that fire deep inside,
and come alive.

This is my life,
I'm going to live it right,
no regrets or shame,
time to play the game.

I know I live,
I know I die,
so let me live,
while I'm alive.

There's no mistake,
I'm going to face,
plenty of adversity,
but I will make the best of it.

I can't resist,
your **** twist,
your poison kiss,
it makes me die.

It makes my mind,
stretch until,
the end of time,
and burn alive.

Flesh rots away,
the feelings stay,
drive me insane,
but I can't run.

Can't find my gun,
I can't get out,
I am the one,
you called your sun.

I'm broken down,
don't make a sound,
look all around,
no one cares.

They all just stare,
as I stumble,
they all just stare,
as I crumble.

Rotted, spoiled,
like a piece of bad meat.
In need of oil,
like a rusty machine.

Gears won't turn,
fire won't burn.
Can you keep me burning?
Keep my gears turning?

I'm alone,
everyday,
thoughts surround,
my mind in waves.

I don't know,
if there's a way,
to save myself,
from my own hate.

Always fear,
the end is near,
but it keeps turning,
and I keep living,
unwilling.

Crusted over,
my eyes are closed.
There's nothing worth,
seeing anymore.

I just walk this Earth,
blind and empty.
Wondering why,
did God send me?

I need to,
get away,
from this broken,
burnt up place.

If you want,
come with me,
we can leave here,
be set free.

I'm not staying,
in this hell,
I'm better off dead,
than myself.

This fire's growing stronger,
the temperature's rising.
I'm burning alive,
there's hatred arising.

From the ashes of my charred heart,
comes a pain I cannot bear.
I'm screaming for help,
but no one seems to care.

I'm going to be honest,
I'm not okay.

There's a lover still alive in me,
a fighter, a friend.
But he's drowning in complexities,
and the tide's pulling him in.

This ocean is rising quickly,
I'm struggling to get free.
Every effort to escape fails,
as the water rushes over me.

I'm not okay.

I cannot climb this mountain,
it's taken all my hope.
The ***** is too slippery,
I can't do this alone.

I'm not okay.

Tighten your grip,
tug on the leash.
Rip out my heart,
and feed it to me.

Don't make me beg,
I'm not one to kneel.
But if you're lucky,
maybe I'll bleed.

Don't think of me,
as a lover.
Think of my dear,
as another pet.

Here for the now,
not for the later.
Life short lived,
then I'm gone.

Then you restart,
throw me aside.
All I'm saying is,
don't expect me to love you.

There's a door inside,
of my heart,
bolted shut.

No one in,
no one out.

Many before have tried,
to break it down,
to dismantle it.

But no one can,
get inside.

There's a key,
somewhere deep,
inside my chest.

Reach inside,
see what you find.

No promises,
you might be,
disappointed.

When you find,
nothing there.

I'm an empty soul,
a broken promise,
a bad cold.

I'm everything,
you hate.

So leave me,
let me be,
closed up.

I'll open my door,
when I'm ready.

Clinically insane,
on the fritz.
Exploding,
into bits.

Boggling,
my mind.
Don't worry,
I'm fine.

I'm on an adventure,
to outer space.
I'm on the moon,
I'm in your face.

Too far away,
I need my space.
Give me your love,
but make me chase it.

I'm long gone,
but I feel fine.

I'm insane,
but I feel fine.

Lost my brain,
but I feel fine.

I'm long gone,
but I feel fine.

I'm going deep,
under the sea.
Would you like,
to join me?

The waters cool,
crystal clear.
The deeper you go,
the less you fear.

I'm long gone,
but I feel fine.

I'm insane,
but I feel fine.

Lost my brain,
but I feel fine.

I'm long gone,
but I feel fine.

I know she knows she wants to be the queen of the world,
well I'm sorry girl.
Pick another profession,
maybe one with a little less attention.
She's flipping a switch she can't switch,
she's just another bad *****.

Hey,
I say,
turn the other way.

She,
she says,
I cannot change.

I,
I say,
behave with a little more class.
But she doesn't give a rats ***.

She's working and working the runway like a diva,
and trust me, there's no way to please her.
She'll teach you how to fly and help you get off the ground,
just so she can shoot you down.
She pretends you mean nothing at all,
now can you weather her storm?

Please,
don't tease,
don't tease me.

I need,
her love,
just to breathe.

She holds,
my heart,
in her hand.

It's hers,
to take,
a keepsake.

But she,
she just,
won't give a ****.
She crushes my heart in her hand.
She crushes my heart in her hand...
She crushes my heart in her...
She crushes my heart in...
She crushes my heart...
She crushes my...
She crushes...
She....

You want to tell me you don't know,
where you want to go.

I'm telling you I won't go,
anywhere with that attitude.

The stars are easily attainable,
if you try to touch the sky.

I'll go anywhere you go,
as long as you reach higher.

You are who,
who you are!
You're gonna go far,
never forget that.

You can be,
be a star!
Just be who you are,
never forget that.

Never forget that.

You say I am crazy,
crazy as can be.

I say you are lazy,
reach for the stars with me.

You are who,
who you are!
You're gonna go far,
never forget that.

You can be,
be a star!
Just be who you are,
never forget that.

Never forget that.

And I don't want you to,
be like me.
I want you to grow,
live a better life than me.

Please don't let me down,
don't let me be correct.
Prove me wrong baby,
give it your all, give it your best.

I know you have potential,
life's about taking risks.

You don't need credentials,
to prove you know how to live.
Prove you know how to live.

This world is,
mighty big.
Makes me think,
I'm too small.
Not at all,
I'm just right.
Can't complain,
I'll go insane.

I love this life,
does it love me?

Can't control,
everything.
I'm the king,
for the world.
Have you heard,
the good news?
I love you,
life does too.

There's so little time,
got all I need.

This world's cruel,
I'm out of tune.
I don't need,
your bad news.
Got my thoughts,
and loved ones.
That's enough,
for a lifetime.

Years have passed, they flew by,
I don't understand.
Still find myself asking why,
I don't understand.
Here one second and then gone,
I don't understand.
Every day, a new dawn,
I don't understand.

Why did you have to take away,
the only man who cold make me smile?
Why did he have to go so soon,
couldn't you wait a while longer?

With every dawn comes a songbird,
with every day, a new surprise.

There's a long road ahead now,
I must stand.
Have to walk it alone,
I must stand.
You were the only to,
understand.
Gave me hope and reason,
to finally stand.

You may be far away now,
but you're always in my heart.
I know you'll be watching,
from the stars.

I hope I make you smile,
from afar.

Burning,
the clock is turning.
The flame,
will never go out.

Holding,
unto your word,
hoping,
that word is enough.

The light go out but the flame burns on.
I hope this night won't last long.

Waiting,
for something tainted.
Choking,
with all the smoke.

The night goes on and the flame dims.
Your word is now irrelevant.

I choke on our love, the last of it,
inhale, exhale, cherish it.

I feel cold,
broken and old,
forgotten, sold,
tossed aside like a bad piece of meat.
Overdue,
expired,
and in a way,
underappreciated.
Wasted.
Used up.
Like an old tube of toothpaste,
or an eraser to small to hold onto,
it's shavings spread across the universe.
I know there is more,
more to me.
Potential lost,
in a carcass tossed,
into a burning fire.
Hate,
no desire,
and a fear of what I could become.
But what could I become if I tried?
A philosopher,
a hero,
a story untold.
A skydiver,
a tree climber,
or maybe just an *******.
I could be a world,
a world of possibilities.
Or I could be nothing,
lost in infinity.
But I'll never know,
guess I'll be nothing.

Shaving seconds,
manipulating minutes,
trying to beat time.

Breaking down,
without a sound,
send me a sign.

Reading waves,
vibes and phases.
I can't help,
if you don't try.

There's a world waiting,
a world worth saving,
and I see it in you.

I'll fight the battle,
I'll win the war,
I'll do all I can do.

Give me a moment,
a second at least,
I need to explain,
my heart is true.

I'll save you,
if it's the last thing I do.
I'll save you.

Troubled is the soul,
put on hold.
Stuck in transition,
limbo without permission.

Broken into pieces,
shattered in fact,
fallen off track,
down the not so beaten path.

Cold in the bones,
grown weary and old.
Fragile and weak,
and quite frankly, meek.

I feel for you poor soul,
for your life has been sold.
Sold for nothing more,
than three stones, maybe four.

Or a cheap Sunday *****?
One better than the last,
one with a vicious, broken past,
one picked out of the trash.

The years go on and on and on,
on repeat, like a bad song,
and you can't help but feel blue,
trapped in transition, without a clue.

You hold on to a battered past,
like the *****, you feel like trash,
cast aside in the waiting room,
gun to your head, your life is ruined.

And all because,
you never gave enough.

Isn't life tough?

The crooked culture,
like a preying vulture,
picks at the flesh of the feeble,
the financially unable,
but not those particularly stable.

Peel back the skin,
can't help but cringe,
the gears grind and screech,
they **** life like a leech,
fail to practice what they preach.

**** this modern love,
it makes me sick.
Possession over obsession,
and if there is an obsession,
it's with the ring.

Doesn't that sting?

The world is a mess,
fracturing under the stress.
The weight of this culture,
this modern love,
and much more,
has us racing,
spacing,
and downright chasing,
our dreams.

I’ve been treated like dirt,
been kicked around.
I have doubted my worth,
made not a sound.

Like an unaccounted for star,
I shone bright like the sun.
Begging for help,
I found no one.

A day came around,
when it finally hit.
I thought I had issues,
I ain’t got ****.

I’ve seen kids become killers,
and friends pop pills.
I’ve seen “freaks” that frankly,
just can’t stand still.

I’ve seen people I know,
take their own lives.
I’ve seen grown men cry,
when they lost their wives.

I can’t believe,
I was so selfish.
I thought I had issues,
I ain’t got ****.

There are people starving,
this world’s alarming,
there’s war and crippling disease.
To think for a second,
I had it worse,
was as selfish as can be.

I ain’t got ****,
compared to the kid,
who’s parented just separated.

I ain’t got ****,
compared to any person,
who’s lost a loved one.

I ain’t got ****,
I ain’t got ****.

If I had a millions wishes,
I'd wish every one away on you.
If I had a time machine,
I'd go back and time and tell you I love you.

There isn't a day that goes by,
where I am not thinking about you.
I spend every day and every night,
wishing that I could see you,
wishing that I could be with you,
once again.

If I could sit with you on the porch,
I surely would, one last time.
If I could share a cigarette with you,
I would if it meant you'd be by my side.

There isn't a day that goes by,
where I'm not thinking about you.
It's hard, these feelings that I fight,
I try my hardest to be strong for you,
I try my hardest, but I long for you,
to be here with me,
once again.

I miss playing cards,
and watching Discovery channel,
I miss the nights we spent alone.
Out on the front porch,
all the smoke and ***** jokes,
how I wish you would come back home.

There isn't a day that goes by,
where I am not thinking about you.
I spend every day and every night,
wishing that I could see you,
wishing that I could be with you,
once again.

Life, so magnificent,
so glorious,
so rare,
would you find yourself in me?

I think and I feel,
but is that enough?
Or do I think too much,
and not feel enough?

We all think we are living,
but being alive is not all we think.
It's what we do with this life,
what we do while we're alive,
that makes this life live.

Look at yourself,
and think,
is there life in me?
Not are you alive,
or are you living,
but is there adventure,
beauty,
an infatuation with love?
Is there music,
is there motion,
is there poetry,
is there art?

Are you full of life,
or are you just living?

Feel the energy,
all around you,
waiting to be set free.

Feel the life,
all around you,
let it consume thee.

Let there be adventure,
let there be beauty,
may you be infatuated with love.
Let there be music,
poetry in motion,
let there be art inside and out.

Let there be life,
let there be life.

I've seen suns go down,
and rise again.
I've suffered cold winters,
and felt warm Mays.

I've fallen to repetition,
broke the chain.
I've felt total heart break,
new love came.

I guess what I'm trying to say is,
don't be so down.
Everything eventually,
turns around.

Had no one to talk to,
made new friends.
Got lost in my own maze,
found the end.

Fell into a darkness,
found light around the bend.
Thought my life was over,
but love was sent.

I guess what I'm trying to say is,
when all seems wrong,
just wait because soon,
the bad will be gone.
There's always a bright side,
that will come along.

I waited so long,
I cannot stand.
Could only be strong for so long,
I'm just man.
All I do is wrong,
not my plan.
I've carried your weight for so long,
did all I can.

You need to get on your feet,
and rise up again.
You need to stand tall,
and fight my friend.

I can't be here forever,
soon I'll fade away.

Watched you grow slowly,
into a man.
Made sure you learned to be,
best you can.

And if you can't be your best,
I'm still happy you tried.
But don't be afraid to try,
and touch the sky.

I won't be here forever,
but forever, I'll be proud.

I will always love you,
that you must know.
Never let this memory,
never let it go.

We take for granted,
the water that we drink,
the air that we breathe,
the thoughts that we think.

We are forsaken,
for not remembering our past,
for forgetting our mistakes,
far too fast.

Nations kneel before us,
they worship the soil beneath our feet,
wish they had the opportunity,
we were given.

They grovel before us,
asking for a chance to be seen,
they cry and they weep,
but to no avail.

We take for granted,
the simplest of things,
from our rights as human beings,
to our diamond encrusted rings.

And still we take,
more than we give.
I'm just happy to be alive,
happy I'm allowed to live.

Understand, I make mistakes too,
I don't recycle and that might insult you.
But at least I try,
every day of my life,
to be better than,
I was the day before.

So join in with me,
in the fight to be,
better than you were before.

If we all join in,
this world will begin,
to be better than before.

Comfort me with your love,
let it wrap its arms around me,
lift me to infinity.

I feel lost in the alleys of my mind,
no guiding light or love to shine.
I fall into the dark recesses of my mind.
If only you were on time,
you'd be a savior.

Now you're just late.

I question sometimes if there is a love,
I have felt it before,
or so I think.
But since then,
nevermore.

I feel as if though,
I'm not asking for much.
Just someone to kiss and hold,
and do such things till we grow old.

Or just be my guiding light,
through these dark times.

Is that too much to ask?

I've been thinking,
but thinking can wait.
The world is fueled,
by evil and hate.

It ***** up,
all the right and leaves wrong.
Crooked men,
keep singing their song.

They corrupt and ****,
people like you.
Say they're the good guys,
the last of a few.

I know I'm higher,
than **** like them.
Better than the mud,
at the bottom of the pen.

I read papers,
they reek of sin.
I try my best,
not to let them in.

I keep my mindset,
looking forward.
Last I heard,
this world was falling apart.

I hope,
we can find.
I way to,
save all mankind.

If we don't,
it's no big deal.
We won't be here,
in one hundred years.

I'm waiting for you to come.

                 There's an open sore on my heart.

                                                         ­          It's bleeding profusely.

                                                 It's beating quite uselessly.

                                I feel my skull cracking.

                                                      ­             My head's split in half.

       My spine is bent backwards.

                                                There­ is no love afterwards.

                                                    ­                                                                 ­                         I fall silently into the night.

                                                         ­               I call quietly to hold you tight.

                                                         ­  I try mightily to do you right.

But still I find myself crawling.

When you look through the pummeling rain,
you see her standing there.
Her polka-dot red dress soaking wet,
as is her hair.

But when you reach out for her,
she disappears.
Nothing scares more,
than what you fear.

The fear of losing everything,
losing her.
Like having the world there,
in the palm of your hand,
only to drop it in the sewer.

And the grate is just to thin for you to reach in.

Sitting on a cliff,
the wind pushed him towards the edge.
Wounds he self inflicted,
on his arms and hands.

Soon he stood and then,
he let himself go.
He fell down and down,
to the ocean below.

What does it mean?
The life he lives.
It has him wondering,
what he's worth.
Is there worth,
in the time he's spent?
Or is he just the living dead.

When he crashed into the waves,
they tossed him up and down.
But he was not shaken,
he just kept trying to drown.

It wasn't till,
he saw a beach,
when he began to swim,
to loving peace.

He lived love,
and he lost.
Had he gone,
far enough?
Is there no,
turning back?
He's living death.

When he reached the shore of hymns,
night had fallen.
So he praised the moon,
guided by it's light,
he survived,
he's alive.

There is life,
and there's death.
There's an in between,
in which some of us live.
Those few of us,
lost in our heads,
we are the living dead.

Seeping through the pores in their suffocated skin,
it whirls and it whimpers in the whipping wind.
It flows through the veins of the teens,
it echoes in their unbound screams,
the angst that they feel is nothing to go unseen.

They wield a weapon more powerful than their fist,
but they still can't stop the urge of cutting their wrists.
Their minds are as strong as their bones,
which hold up their hearts broken home,
they are stronger than all the stick and stones.

I don't believe in a lot of things,
but I believe in this generation.
We're teens with open hearts,
and open minds.

I've seen heartbreak,
I've made mistakes.
I've seen bloodshed,
I've had girls **** with my head!

I've had glazed eyes,
I've watched the skies.
I've been beat down,
I've been stuck in this here town,
forever.

For what feels like forever.

And you know what I say to all this,
it's been a good life, good life.
Slapped me on the face, a gentle kiss,
and I wouldn't have had it any other way.

I've been held high,
but never glorified.
I've been treated,
like a piece of meat, yeah!

I've been shot down,
I've been around.
I've kissed feet,
and I'll never repeat this!

And you know what I say to all this,
it's been a good life, good life.
Slapped me on the face, a gentle kiss,
and I wouldn't have had it any other way.

It's been a good life, good life.

When I came into this big world,
I knew nothing of pain and sorrow.
I grew up, blinded by my blanket,
never watched the news,
because I just couldn't follow it.

Days turned months, months turned to years,
as the days continued to rocket by.
Till one day, I felt a pain inside,
the day my grandfather died.

I remember my mother calling me,
waking me from a deep slumber.
She said, "Boys, quick, come in here,
you're grandfather has died",
as she stumbled back into the in-law apartment.

I ripped off my blanket,
and in what felt like an instant,
I was by his bedside.
My aunts and my mother cried,
but I just stood there.

I felt nothing.

So I left the room,
crawled up the stairs into our house,
and sat on the couch,
alone.

I sat there for a few minutes,
thinking,
"this isn't real",
and I think for a brief moment,
I believed myself.

That was until I saw the hearse.

It slowly backed into my driveway,
eerily rolling ever so slowly,
then it came a complete stop.

A man stepped out and walked to the back or the vehicle,
he opened the two swinging back doors,
which flew open with ease.
He then pulled out what looked like a stretcher,
it was draped with a white sheet.
A few of my uncles pulled up next to the hearse,
jumped out of their trucks,
and rushed inside.

The man followed them.

And soon enough,
they all came back out.
Following them was the man with the stretcher.

Resting in it,
covered in another white sheet,
was my grandfather.

My family gathered around the back of the hearse.
Most of my aunts were crying,
with my uncles comforting them.

That was when it hit me.

I felt my chest caving in,
my lungs deflating,
my heart imploding on itself.

A lone tear fell from my eye as I watched the man ease my grandfather into the back of his hearse,
and drive away.

The man I loved,
was gone.

The man who told me ***** jokes,
was gone.

The man who made me a man,
was gone.

The only man who understood me,
was gone.

I made my way to my bedroom,
where I began to weep uncontrollably.

Never in my life had I felt such pain.

And never again,
will I feel a pain as powerful,
as I did the day,
my grandfather died.

Walking through sand,
blustering winds.
Whipping my face,
I trek through tinariwen.

Seeking peace, a new life,
Tassili n'Ajjer stands in my way.
There is not much time,
sun sets on this day.

I climb,
I walk,
I sit,
I kneel,
I feel,
the sand beneath my bare feet.

My tagelmust, takatkat and akarbey,
are all I really own.
That and the camel that follows.

I feel a colder air whipping with the sand,
so I set up for the night.
I pray with all my might.

May Set calm the storms,
and Isis deliver me home,
to my new home,
my new home.

Snow squashed beneath my feet,
colored with dirt and gasoline,
as I shuffled down the road.

I had many more miles to go,
and it looked like the snow,
wasn't letting up anytime soon.

With my pack on my back,
and my stick holding a sack,
I trudged forward, fearlessly.

To find a home,
was my only goal,
but that seemed out of reach.

So I wandered into the woods,
and pulled up my hood,
as I looked for a place to set up camp.

And the nights were cold,
my toes, they froze,
as I bundled up in my blanket.

How long would I survive?
Would I make it out alive?
Question ran rampant though my head.

Till one morning, I woke,
there seemed to be a white smoke,
that blanketed the ground.

In front of me,
something pearly,
what looked like massive gates.

At the gate, a man stood waiting,
and after much contemplation,
I approached him.

He said, "come closer my son,
you're here for all you've done,
you traveled everywhere, doing good.

And now you have earned,
what most people will yearn for,
a spot in my kingdom."

"But sir," I retorted too him,
"I never believed in you."
The man looked at me and smiled.

"I forgive everyone,
you see son,
and you deserve this."

It was then,
we began to ascend,
into his kingdom.