Years that before
Mercy neared close enough
That the blur of the scene
Disappeared in the rough
So unsure what I mean
Or where would i reconvene...
And with whom?
When we are were we are
where they are there just to consume...
Everything they could.
Selling off everything that's good.

From that blinding white clear disaster
I thought I must fight or I'll rot even faster
I fought so I might keep from finding
I'm not really right and what's left's just reminding me how  
High I shot and now why I forgot to keep track what I bought that I caught up a lesson I set out too taught

You became my idol
and I became idle.
I don't blame you,
you've always been the same.
It was my mistake
to shake the heart awake
was just
to make it break apart.

To gaze from nowhere to the sky
at night, as it is starry,
are all the ways I bare as why
for bright, I am so sorry.

There is no
knowing where we were
or what we were
there for....
therefore, there is no going back.

Woulds that have been
growing as I
compare
myself, unsure,
but with what
more
I  wish I could,                  I wish I had.

But I'm too slow.             And I lose track.
Rather than show it, I just forfeit every attack.

Like a tumbleweed
caught
on a chain-link fence
surrounding the lot
where it grew,
I have found to
be humble is to need
what I'm not,
and that pain taught me uncommon sense...
thereby
grounding what has got
me through.

Whatever I thought,
I thought I knew
If I'm freed, I will crumble
and rot, remain sinking
in nonsense that I've misconstrued.

I know I do.

Lacking ample reason, I set you on a pedestal carved out of stone.

And I said, I'll be back in a season, I'm not really gone,

I just fed what starved us; the black of the night of doubt while alone.

The allegation I believe did not require consideration
It was a gross exaggeration out of desperation
This fabrication, and every sick insinuation,
A complication of a self explanation
Of your deprivation and justification
For your manipulation to suit your temptation,
infatuation with your impersonation
Contamination
Indignation within your contamination,
An accusation of your relation became your revelation,
It was not your reputation anymore under investigation
Starving for salvation, you fed each sick implication
As if each misrepresentation in vindication were a donation
To trade your damnation for his incarceration
As if creation of a demonstration

Desperation for an explanation
For your infatuation with temptation
Deprivation justification was indignation,
Accusation of impersonation -
Realization of manipulation
Salvation from damnation
Clarification of contamination
Allegation as donation
The Incarceration cancellation
The only explanation

I woke up, I cannot find the earth.
So I spoke up, just to remind myself
I am, I am, I am
still worth a ****.
I choke up but I am.

Where is the earth,
I ache for the soil
which caught me from birth
I take for granted that I was granted the spoil.
Is it genuine if it was not a choice, am I loyal?
Has it been a gift to get a thought and voice,
or do I sit
where I get  hit
because my spot
is one that taught
my father that none
get done,
that to win is hardly ever to have won.
To begin to disregard is to sever from what you’d begun.
You've been a coward too clever to run.
Are you empowered that you never were a son?
Instead devoured forever a family by the web a liar spun?