Our hands interlock,
yet,
we couldn't be any farther away.

I try to navigate
take the longer path
hope the roads confuse me
hope they create an illusion,
not even the steadiest eyes could endure

I try to memorize what I need to explain
hope a beast surrounds me and takes my breath away
hope it leaves me with no chance to speak again

I try to persuade myself it's all going to be okay
but really
i wish it wasn't me
who had to carry the bags
explain the mess

eventually I run out of roads to take,
fake illusions to make, and their are no more beasts that could possibly harm me

so i tell them the truth

'the pain hurts every single day, and I'm afraid, his memory is never going away'

and if a tear or two falls down my cheeks
I turn my back and accept - i've done my best.

The poet inside of me,
wants to believe,
he could love me.

For when he whispered in my ear,
I couldn't dare stop the tug of my lips.

But, I had to remind myself
he's just a friend.

I may think, write, explore
yet, love for me
is nothing my pen or paper,
can create.

I'm crying
because I understand now
I let you go
why
I was afraid together we would go places
I could never go alone
and that scared me

and now I feel horrible
I'm lonely
it's my fault
I had you
but now you have her
oh, what did I do?

We spend the majority of our lives waiting.
She waits for the July heat to give her a healthy glow,
he waits for the winter ice to skate with his friends.
Regardless, we wait
and some of us are fortunate to receive the pleasure,
or the satisfaction we were waiting for.
Some of us
we wait,
and wait, yet
we don't get the picture perfect snowflakes,
or the beach trips with our friends.

Months, maybe even years,
and we get just one day
to say,
or better yet
conclude
how we really feel-or how we felt
because
our outcome
wasn't worth waiting for.
And now

the time we have to wait
is no longer there,
and were left with just one feeling

regret

most of the time
I'm not aware
where you are
or how you feel
and this should be a good thing

I know you told me to leave
and I know when I put up a fight
gripped you tight
you got mad

so I am in the right
I need to leave you be
I also need to be strong
importantly I need to move on

yet the darkness I succumb to late at night
is like a calendar
reminding me
its been so many hours, days, weeks, and months
since I last touched your face

and oh
I crave your touch
your husky voice
in my ear
saying
'i've got you'

now I have to find another
to catch me
whisper 'you're safe'