i wasted my first kiss on a girl i did not truly love,
only done in the heat of the moment and the almost desperate feeling that i would never be anything without it

her lips did not taste like what they say in the books and movies
i felt no heat or passion, regardless of how hard i tried
if anything, it felt wrong

afterwards, she told me she loved me
but i could not return her feelings;
i will never say i love someone if i truly do not,
because people do not deserve to be hurt that way,
the way i've been hurt, time and time again

the stories you hear people tell about their first kiss
always has a feel of magic to it, and the joy they spread, a good memory,
one that most would want to relive

but mine will always be about a girl i will never love
and i often find myself wishing it never ******* happened in the first place

i hope the next time you eat chocolate covered strawberries
you think of me
the way we'd share the taste of the bittersweet chocolate and the almost saccharine taste of fresh fruit between our lips
on those cold october nights

i hope the next time you listen to the crickets chirp at night
you think of how we used to snuggle up in bed late at night
attentive to nothing but the other's heartbeat and the insects outside play their songs for hours

i hope the next time you see those plaid patterns
you think of how i'd wrap myself all up in your flannels just to keep warm- the soft, woven fabrics brushing against my face

i just hope you don't forget about me the next time you kiss her

Dry your eyes,
Little girl.
Don't let them in.
They're only words.

There, now. There.
It's just a tear.
A raindrop from your  
Atmosphere.

I promise you
Clear skies again.
Brush off your knees.
Arise again.

Dry your eyes,
My little friend.
More things begin
Where others end.

So stand and shine
Despite their words.
They envy you.
Of course it hurts.