Lit up like a christmas tree
That’s the girl I want to be
Someone I only know
When you’re with me

It’s confusing
The unknown before me
The world I’ve yet to see
On my own
All alone
Filled with uncertainty
Yet free

I wanted you all the while
I was in love with someone else
But it was you who made me smile
And made my heart melt

But I didn’t want to be alone
And I knew our timing wasn’t right
So I settled for the thing I’d known
Ignoring thoughts of you that came at night

I shut off all those feelings
And told myself it was wrong
Ignoring that love should have no ceiling
And that I couldn’t live like that for long

And now I just want to tell you
How strongly that I feel
But I fear you won’t like the way I grew
And for real was not our deal

There's nothing more impossible
Than the trick of this ****
When you do what you can
But they choose to ignore it
You're labeled as an other
Because their conscience can't sit
And they tear you down
Whatever way they see fit
And you don't know why they do it
And you're not a half wit
You just trust and think the best
But the pieces don't fit
So you try to ignore them
And beg yourself not to quit
But you end up tired
And with nothing to show for it

How foolish of me
To think that love was more important
Than happiness

I made a list of the things I need
And it’s only ten lines long
You were almost all of them
Except for the very first one

I let myself skip over the first line
And didn’t even know
I saw you for how wonderful you are
Not knowing butterflies wouldn’t grow

I keep forgetting
The weight that was lifted
When you let me go

I keep forgetting
The light in my eyes
That reignited

I keep forgetting
That I am whole again
All on my own

But I won’t forget
What I’ve learned
From being hurt