Truth be told
My heart was heavy for a little while
And the weight was so much
That I was too weak to see you

But it's getting lighter day by day
And I can see you now
And boy, do I love you
Boy, do I love you

I feel like when I fell for you
I fell onto another ledge
and this time
I'm petrified of falling off

I look off the edge
of my pleasant little peak
and what I see
terrifies me

Stories of heartbreak,
of betrayed trust
and unpredictable distance
surround me

I'm terrified of what you can do to me.

I love you
I love to be with you
and I want to be with you
and know you
more

But I'm too afraid to ask
or when I do ask
I feel like I messed up
because I don't want to ask anything of you

But I know better than that

Changing who I am
to be what I think others want me to be
gets me nowhere
and is disrespectful to myself

My worth exists outside of you

but I'm scared for the part of me
that I've given to you
and what could happen to me
if you take it for good.

not until I had to leave
did I realize
just how much
I missed you

you are a part of who I am
to go without you
is like to go without
a piece of my body

it's possible to survive for a bit
but the pain grows and grows
and soon enough I realize
it's too much to bear

and so I called you
and I told you
and I love you
and I love you

i don't think i can bear it

the idea of a life
lived in the service
of those
just barely
alive
is noble

but i don't think i can bear it

it hurts
it is
heartbreaking
to witness
such brokenness

the hurt is the kind that lingers
and seeps into all your crevices
and never leaves your side
like a shadow

i don't think i can bear it
even if i can help
to ease their hurt

i don't think i can bear it

Sometimes the distance
feels oh so wide
we're out of synch
walking along a divide

Those are the times
when I feel blue
I yearn and overthink,
and wonder if you do too

But sometimes we're strong
and push the distance away
for a moment or two
like we did yesterday

We were on the same beat
both really there;
togetherness can be
found anywhere

Those are the times
when my heart smiles
and remembers that love
can travel miles and miles

The regular usage
of certain adjectives
has diminished the fortitude
to which they are entitled

But I have found some things
that have taught me their true meaning
and merit their characterization
For instance,

One ought to reserve "breathtaking"
to describe the sunflower field
that I ran to, laughing, with friends
bursting with joyful yellows and grounding greens
as far as the eye can see
reaching, yearning for the light

One ought to reserve "incredible"
to describe the dance between the sky and the river
so beautiful that it truly is difficult to believe
the way the sky looks like a painting
brushed by the passion of an artist
and the way it is reflected by the river
which adds a twinkle as the water waltzes to and fro

One ought to reserve "awesome"
to describe the bustling city
that has beauty and history tucked into every corner
and that positively sparkles in the nighttime
the city in which you have no control over the smile that makes a home on your face
and the way your eyes hurry to take it all in

Je suis contente que j'ai appris
le sens de ces beaux mots
et que j'ai eu des moments
vraiment magnifiques

Regular consumption of art
Careful observation of the outdoors
A challenge with which to grapple
Café au lait
Walking as a mode of transportation
Learning through conversation
Documenting how you feel
Going the extra mile for others (when you don't have to)
Chocolate bars eaten in their entirety
Exaggerated French accents
Shedding your inhibitions and embracing your bravery
Loved ones