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10.3k · Sep 2014
Unknown
Abigail de Jesus Sep 2014
at the end of a hallway
looking out the window at night
there is a sense of coldness seeping through my warm blood
going through me and taking over

under the bed
inside of your head
is there a demon waiting?
lurking through the cover of darkness
stealthily destroying all sense of confidence

where is the light?
i can't find the switch
i'm just reaching out into the dark
a void filled with the unknown

the present is all you know
and maybe some of your past
and your future is all that's unknown
I apologize for the lowercase, I was too lazy to press the shift button over and over again.
4.1k · Jul 2014
Forgotten
Abigail de Jesus Jul 2014
A homeless man used to sit on the sidewalk near the grocery store
But now he's gone

My best friend used to smile
But her smile is now gone

Birds used to sing outside my window
But now they're gone

The sun used to shine into my room but now I've closed the curtains

Because the love that we had is gone

There used to be love in this world but now it's gone
3.1k · Jun 2014
Rain
Abigail de Jesus Jun 2014
I used to love the rain
And now it makes me sad
The sweet memories we had of delightful pain
On my heart, there's a stain
And you may think my soul is bad
But you're the one to blame
The rain used to make me so glad
2.5k · Jun 2014
You're Hot
Abigail de Jesus Jun 2014
Um I just really like your face
This poem is a disgrace


But your face is not
I'm not even sure
2.0k · Jul 2014
Thoughts
Abigail de Jesus Jul 2014
I sometimes dream of the devil
He wants to take my soul someplace
Even though I know of his evil
I let his cold steal away of my scarred face

Now I'm hungry for pain
My heart is gone
And the devil left a stain
Where is the light that once shone?
836 · Sep 2014
Confusion
Abigail de Jesus Sep 2014
Turn this way, I'm certain
Not sure if this way is the right way
Close the final curtain
The show is long since over and I cant stay

I don't know where to go or where I'm headed
Walking into a void in blindness

They say I could be a writer
Or a lawyer, an artist
Or a nurse, a scientist
But I desire for something greater

These poems mean nothing until the stars cry my name
Begging for one more poetic sentence about their light
Dancing throughout the black space-less sky
And I still wonder why
Why do I continue to cry

Will he still stay with me even though I've been broken
The promises the stars keep may be unfulfilled when the future is open
I'm not sure where to go in life anymore
668 · Sep 2014
Childhood
Abigail de Jesus Sep 2014
Running through the backyard barefoot
I'm screaming at the top of my lungs for my missing stuffed toy
There is pink in the sky
My dad says stop crying

And I wonder what he's doing now
It's dark outside and my night lights on
I hear crickets outside and my sobs
I hope my teddy is ok
558 · Jul 2014
2am Thoughts
Abigail de Jesus Jul 2014
I'm sorry I pretended to be angry at you. I need to hear your low voice and feel your arms around me. I'm crying alone in my room and I have nothing to hold because I threw your sweater into the back of closet. I'm so confused and the razor in my bathroom continues to taunt my skin. My tears feel hot against my cheeks. I hate myself so much.
519 · Jul 2014
Your Music
Abigail de Jesus Jul 2014
You had such a good music taste and you told me to listen to those songs but I never did. And now that we're over the only thing I'm doing is listenning to them, crying. Why did I ever neglect those songs? I neglected you in general and maybe that's why you won't come back to me even though you say you still love me.
475 · Jul 2014
Disparity
Abigail de Jesus Jul 2014
Staring through the cold darkness
As the sky becomes darker

For another night of eternity
I wonder when will this end?

As I lay here
Sadness overcomes my happiness
And I cry until morning
469 · Jun 2014
His Eyes
Abigail de Jesus Jun 2014
Look up to the enchantingly dark skies
The blue of I've in the devil's eyes
Or like the coldness in his smiles
All I recall are his saddening sighs

So why is he in disparity?
This world has become too scary
And he no longer holds me in valiantly
But his voice used to hold temerity

So I spend hours fantasizing
Of bright skies and his lying
We used to spend time flying
His eyes are actually very beautiful.
448 · Jun 2014
Waste-Aways
Abigail de Jesus Jun 2014
Some people lead halcyon lives
They tend to speak with soft, quiet voices
And enjoy watching clouds go by in the skies
They desire making small, inconsequential choices
They watch the world whirl around then with awe-filled eyes

Others are the polar opposite,
Living their lives with temerity.
They prefer to never rest and sit.
They carry out decisions boldly
Their mentalities are filled with sass,
Causing other personalities to clash.

The fortunate ones have tutelage,
Knowing how to act civilized and polite.
But being able to justify the savage
They have sense to avoid a fight

But I, I am what they call a mess,
Unlike the peaceful ones, or those with boldness
The way I think is seen as madness
My opinion is not one that I scream,
I'm just avoiding the scene
I'm merely an anathema,
With a queer persona
I see what others do not,
That's the only difference I've got.
For I am philistine,
Shunned by the others, it seems.
442 · Jul 2014
Fading
Abigail de Jesus Jul 2014
As the sunset fades from the sky
As sugar disappears in tea
Please explain why

Because the love we had is fading
And my heart continues aching
Like how my lips used to after kissing
435 · Sep 2014
Teen
Abigail de Jesus Sep 2014
There was a time when I was happy
Running through a field in the evening when the sun burned pink
Crying for my stuffed toy

Ive spent hours studying for a class I dont care about
The dark circles under my eyes are windows into the darkness inside me
And I stay up at night feeling terrible
Wishing I could have happiness back

A boy broke my heart two years ago
And my first kiss with him tasted weird
And Ive found someone new

Ive changed into the thing I was scared of
The girl who gives herself away
And avoids looking into mirrors
Not wanting to see her ugly face

She donated all her stuff toys years ago except her favorite one
A stuffed elephant

She doesnt know her future yet
397 · Jul 2014
Crappy Poetry
Abigail de Jesus Jul 2014
I love you dear
But I hate you
You are the reason I tear
And the reason I write bad poetry

Deliver me from this madness
Break my heart now
Before it's too late
And I've broken myself

You know how possessive I am
Why can't you hate me
I get mad at you for no reason sometimes
I cry for no reason
I wanna slap your face but at the same time I want to kiss you
I hate you.
Abigail de Jesus Jul 2014
There is a monster clawing at my soul
Salvaging all of my love

And I've seen this creature before
It haunts my dreams as a tiger hunts prey
Fear of this monster may never go away

And as I stare at the mirror
The monster stares back
I might be a monster.
355 · Jun 2014
For Him
Abigail de Jesus Jun 2014
I fell in love with you,
But I was scared to.
I told you the secrets of mine,
And you made me feel fine.

Your face bloomed like a sweet flower,
You casted away my feelings of sour.
From your bright eyes you took my heart,
But that was just the start.
You looked so calm and beautiful despite it all,
Even when you caught me after my fall.

Each lover has a theory of their own,
Of being together, of being alone.

We stay together through every season,
But we sometimes fight without reason.
Our love goes beyond the seas and skies.
I see our love shinning inside your eyes.

You don't know that you're perfect to me,
In the mirror, what do you see?
Don't you see a smile as warm as your sweater?
Or eyes that could love forever?
Don't you see that you're perfect to me?
This is very cheesy.
347 · Mar 2015
I'm Slowly Going Depressed
Abigail de Jesus Mar 2015
I'm trapped within myself and no one cares.
342 · Jul 2014
Writers' Block [10w]
Abigail de Jesus Jul 2014
Blank paper
One's mind remains drifting
Into a bleak nothingness
I've had writers' block for awhile now..
335 · Jun 2014
Dad
Abigail de Jesus Jun 2014
Dad
He steps onto the plane of freedom
Leaving everything behind

But soon he will meet my mother
Fighting against all odds together
As the warmth faces the cold

And love

Years pass
They have three children

But they still suffer from a world away from their families
And he will grow old
And so will I
It's Father's Day.
329 · Jul 2014
Today
Abigail de Jesus Jul 2014
Today I was listenning to the radio and I heard a voice that reminded me of yours. The voice was smooth like nails on a chalkboard. But for some reason, it gave me comfort.
315 · Jun 2014
On the Outside, Looking In
Abigail de Jesus Jun 2014
I stare through the empty, unforgiving black of the dark skies
I've been isolated from the world of true lies

It is ghostly as the thought of love
Yet, as beautiful as a soaring dove

As confusing as why I am alone
As blinding as light that is shone

I've been left alone on the moon
I hope they'll come back soon
My English teacher said she liked this.
307 · Jul 2014
Dying Love
Abigail de Jesus Jul 2014
Like the red in my cheeks
You crept into my heart
Love from you is what my mind seeks
Your voice reminds me of the beauty of art

But as the sun warms my skin
I slowly grow old
And the grass on the lonely hills
Gradually fold
And the pain in my eyes become bold

As the rain stabs my window
I'll feel swollen with sadness
And sometimes I see your shadow
Just months ago you lost your madness

Please come back
That's all I ask
I wrote this a long time ago and only had the encouragement to post it until now.
Abigail de Jesus Jun 2014
How can I subjugate my feelings
When I'm weakened by your thought
With my heart singing

And you're so far away though
My love for you, you'll never know

Countless hours we've both spent
Spent dreaming of love that's absent
And there's no denying when I close my eyes
I dream of you
Abigail de Jesus Jul 2014
Stop falling in love with him
Love is a light that will merely dim
272 · Jun 2014
Dying Love
Abigail de Jesus Jun 2014
Seeing him reminds me of the bliss
That I once had in being selfish

Or how my hands would go clammy
And my heart pounding quickly

As water runs downhill
I run to my windowsill

But I don't see him standing there anymore
What happened to the feeling I had before?

Back when the world was kinder
And the sun shone brighter

So as water runs downhill
I gradually become I'll

So help bring me to my heaven
Where I'll find love without end
271 · Jun 2014
Lonely
Abigail de Jesus Jun 2014
I miss you like the sun misses the moon
This love is tedious doom

How long has the moon gone without warmth and light?
But surely, they see each other, distantly, by sight?

The Moon cries with me when darkness falls, her tears fall from the sky.
We share the pain, of such a love, that is truly a lie.

The Sun feels warmth and light,
Always.
And you feel happy, as if, in flight,
Always.
221 · Jul 2014
Lost
Abigail de Jesus Jul 2014
Do you remember the park?
Because I'm there right now, it's dark

How we used to be so in love here


But now I'm lost in this godforsaken place
I don't even remember your smiling face

I hate the angels that almost took you away



Why didn't they take me

— The End —